Worst Wedding You've Ever Attended

[SWTXBelle]

Let's see . . . my sorority sister with whom I lived for one hellish year (she was part of a package deal - I loved Stacy, so I ended up with her and Alice). First, the invitation - a lovely Victorian era print on the front - but the text - ??? We were asked to come and watch as they celebrated their love. I called Stacy - was this an invitation? We weren't going to go - but then we were asked to be in the house party. Being properly brought up southern girls, we knew we were stuck.
SO - it's August, in San Marcos Texas. I am 6 months pregnant and already pretty darn big. The wedding is outside in a park, near the train tracks and across from the police station. The wedding is delayed because the mother of the bride has disappeared. I am sweltering in a navy blue dress and hat. The groom's side of the affair is interesting - all in jeans, cowboy shirts, trucker hats - and the bride's is in suits, ties, and dresses. Yep, she's marrying Billy Joe Bubba Redneck (and let me say - I have a Bubba in my family, and one or two rednecks, but even they know how to dress for a wedding.) Finally the mom shows up. The wedding can begin!
Alice was a dance major. So here come 4 girls in white unitards, and begin to do a modern dance interpretation of marriage. The groom's side looks decidely uncomfortable.
Finally the wedding proper can begin. Alice comes down the aisle, and they begin their vows. OH WAIT - because the mom was late, the ceremony is now late . . .and here comes the train! The minister continues to try and conduct the service, but no one can hear him.
Did I mention that I'm pregnant? Oh - and this little park has no bathrooms. FUN.
We think the end is near - but no. Every police car at the station begins to peel out, sirens blaring, lights flashing. After that, the minister finally announces they are husband and wife.
Now off to the reception. We RACE to the reception(VFW) hall (I really need a bathroom) . It's locked up. Yeah! So we wait, and wait and wait - finally an aunt of the bride comes and opens it up. Nothing has been set up - other than the cake. No one knows what to do, so I end up setting up a table for the gifts, putting together the punch, getting Stacy to get the refreshments out, and I start pouring punch. That's what I do for the next hour and a half. Finally the happy couple leave,and I then help clean up.
And that's the last I ever heard from Alice No thank you, no phone call, nothing.
Not that I'm bitter.

So what's the worst wedding you've attended/