Name 5 Famous People You Like to Punch

[Stef the Pef]

1. Katie Holmes and her insane hubby. The former getting a punch for actually tolerating the bat-guano-crazy stuff that comes out of the latter; plus, the two count as one because whereever they're hiding, they seem inseparable.

2. Britney Spears...seriously, she gives Louisiana a bad name. The South needs to donate her to a less classy place...like Antarctica? Penguins may dress nice, but they don't wear underwear, either.

3. Rick Perry. Stupid aggie and his okie-style toll roads can just move to Mexico!

4. Carson Daly. Can people without a personality feel punches?

5. Hillary Clinton. Gives the entire female sex a bad, wishy-washy, I'm-sticking-with-a-man-I'd-have-dumped-if-he-weren't-president name.

Bonus punches: Paris Hilton, but since it requires a brain to recognize that you've been hurt, the punch would be a moot point. Just missed the list, though. Same goes with Jessica Simpson. Michael Moore as well, but alas, the fat shields the pain and I'd need a wrecking ball to hit the guy to induce pain through all that blubber. I'd punch Ann Coulter, too, but she'd blame it on the liberals and I wouldn't get any credit! Ashton Kutcher already looks like he's been punched in the face. And a final bonus punch to Rachel Ray, who just...annoys the hell out of me.