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Please don't feel bad about not liking or loving a close relative. My aunt says it best: You don't owe anybody anything.
Ultimately, you have to live your life for yourself. Of course, family is family, but regardless of that, there are TOXIC people in the world. And to make matters worse, one of them may be someone in your family. Be it a parent, grandparent, sibling, aunt/uncle, cousin, etc., you must rid yourself of toxic people. Some folks don't and won't EVER change. EVERYONE has a toxic person in their lives that they must rid themselves of. I have had several over the years. I am dealing with one now. You just have to resolve to live YOUR life.
Let go and let God. Ask God to help and guide you. He will. You can still have that family love for them, but you do NOT have to like them. Nor do you have to deal with anyone that brings you down simply because they are family. You will be OK. I can testify. God wants us to love and you can do that without having contact with someone who brings you down. God knows your heart.
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