I saw the funniest thing on Maury today

[DeltaSigStan]

I called in sick to work, so I came across some paternity tests, which are always amusing. Well, this one was just hilarious.

Maury, on stage by himself, says "This is Joe". They then show a picture of a dorky white dude.
"This is Kate". They show a picture of a chubby white girl.
"And THIS is their son Nathan". They show the pic:

This kid has to be at least half black.

So they bring the mother out, and the husband is so dumb he's always thought it was his son, even though it was OBVIOUS he wasn't.

"People always ask how stupid my husband is, how can he not see?". She's just never wanted to tell him until now.

So they bring the husband on. She reveals the secret, and he runs off crying like Justin Timberlake on Punkd.
"How could you do this to me?"

It was spectacular.

So, they do the paternity test, and he says he's stil praying and thinks it's his, but of course, the test proved negative.

He said he would take care of the kid, but they did an update and he had just up and left when they got home!

I guess you had to have seen it, plus, it's probably fake, but they pulled it off well if so.

[ASUADPi]

I totally saw that!!!!!

I started watching prior to them showing a picture of the child and it was just the mom and "dad" on the stage talking. She is "begging for forgiveness" and he is saying "I'll still be a dad".

Then they show the picture of the kid and I'm thinking "oh my god you are a moron".

I don't want to get all technical with genetics here but come on. Two white parents (assuming that none of their family members is black) are going to have a half black child. Common sense.

I hated to "be mean" to this guy because he was so distraught but its like "your an idiot, that kid is soooo not yours".

Just my two cents.

[PM_Mama00]

Do you think ALL the paternity tests are true on there? I always wonder, when a girl is SWEARING that she hasn't been with anyone else, and is totally distraught about it, and the test comes up negative.... does anyone else wonder? Seems like it's never who they think it is.

[Senusret I]

OOOOOH I wish I had seen that today!

[DeltaSigStan]

Originally posted by PM_Mama00
Do you think ALL the paternity tests are true on there? I always wonder, when a girl is SWEARING that she hasn't been with anyone else, and is totally distraught about it, and the test comes up negative.... does anyone else wonder? Seems like it's never who they think it is.

I'm pretty sure some are fake, but damn, they're hilarious sometimes.

There's this one time this dude wasn't the dad, so he ran into the audience going "Where my boy at? I got some dirt on my shoulder that needs brushing off," and his friend preoceded to get rid of said dirt lol.

Or the always great "12 men tested, is ANYONE the daddy?" themed shows.

The worst was the guy who couldn't get an erection cause he rode a bike 50 miles every day, and he found out his wife was cheating on him, with a steady BF, and she was like "You have to consider how many times I'VE sat there crying like he is, I guess it's just not enough."

That's F*CKED up, the update said he was taking viagra though.

[AOII*Azra-elle]

I saw that one and I was like damn! HELLO! That kid isn't yours! But hey, they had one episode where the girl was white as white can be and the guy was a very DARK african american and the child was white with curly blone hair and blue eyes. The test showed that the guy was the father. Hey it happens! My friend's son is white with blonde hair, but he looks like his dad who is not white! Crazy...

[smiley21]

can maury do anything else? is it his life mission to find every baby's daddy? i remember watching the same topic in a college cafeteria four years ago. to do that topic almost every episode, some HAS to be fake.

[Kevin]

These shows crack me up.

I enjoy a good laugh at the misfortunes that others bring upon themselves.

[ASUADPi]

I too love these shows. Not to be mean to the people on the show but geez how many men do these women sleep with. I remember seeing one case where Maury brought her one not once, not twice but three times with three different men for a paternity test. You got it, none of the men turned out to be her childs father. I was like "what the heck".

But then again I watched Maury the other day and they had on four women (three that were either ex girlfriends or and ex wife) and his current wife and his mother. The three women were all claiming that their total of five children were his. He and his new wife (whom he became "dating" while he was either "dating" or "married" to one of the other women) claimed there weren't. His mom was calling him a moron and pissed because he wasn't stepping up to the plate and taking care of his kids. Well in the end it turned out that all FIVE were his kids. What a moron. LOL.

[breathesgelatin]

I enjoy watching these shows, but I feel bad that I do. Oh well.

[smiley21]

maury should start the My Baby's Daddy Foundation

[adpialumcsuc]

Originally posted by smiley21
maury should start the My Baby's Daddy Foundation

So True...These are the only shows he does any more

[OrigamiTulip]

Wait, he doesn't do the "Is this person a guy or girl?" gender-bending shows anymore? Those were always the best.

[ASUADPi]

betarose I totally agree. I love seeing the "are they male or female shows". I'm usually totally wrong on my guesses too. LOL.