Another Question about Rushing Legacies

southernblonde · #1 06-23-2004, 05:21 PM

I understand that legacies are pretty important to greek organizations. I am a legacy to a sorority, and I will be going through Rush in the fall (as a sophomore). I am nervous that I will not be wanted by a sorority for who I am......but for the fact that I am a legacy. If I do do decide to accept a bid (should I receive one) from this sorority, my worst fear is that I will find out that I'm not really wanted there. Can anyone give me some thoughts on sorting out my feelings of apprehension?

sugar and spice · #2 06-23-2004, 05:28 PM

Here's how most sororities phrase their policy towards legacies: they don't have to accept the girls, but they usually do have to invite them back to the second round of rush, and if they invite you back on Pref night (the last night of rush), they have to put you on their first bid list (a complicated system, but basically what it means is that if you're on their first bid list and you rank them first, you will get a bid from them). But they can drop you in the middle rounds of rush, so they're definitely not usually pressured to invite you back if they really don't want you there.

Of course there are sometimes special circumstances. If you're going through rush at a cut-throat school, they might drop you after the first round. And if you're the great-great granddaughter of a founder or something, they might be feeling a little pressure from sorority headquarters to give you a bid no matter what.

But under normal circumstances, both you and the sorority will be given a good opportunity to see if you're right for each other.

Good luck with rush and keep us posted on how it goes!

WhiteDaisy128 · #3 06-23-2004, 06:01 PM

I agree with everying S & S said. You will know which sororities you feel at home with...and the sororities will know if they are comfortable with you (regardless of if you are a legacy or not). Being a legacy will bring speacial consideration - you might be paired with a really dynamic rusher, but they will not invite you to join SOLELY because you are a legacy.

Join which-ever organization you like the best. Usually if you really like a group, they like you back just as much.

On a side note, I joined the organization to which I was a legacy and it's been an awesome experience!! We had 5 legacies in our chapter and we all had so much fun together. It was also a neat experience to share with my mom...sadly, she has since died, but I feel so much closer to her because of DG.

EXColony · #4 06-23-2004, 09:51 PM

Ditto to everything they just said - just remember to keep your heart in it!

honeychile · #5 06-23-2004, 10:12 PM

You've been given some very good advice!

I'd just like to add that, being a legacy, you shouldn't go into Recruitment thinking that your legacy sorority has to give you a bid, or that you might not prefer a different one.

If you read a few of the Rush Threads, you'll see quite a few legacies who decide that they're more comfortable with another sorority, and accept its bid (I'm a case in point - I didn't pledge my legacy sorority, as wonderful as they were!).

DGqueen17 · #6 06-24-2004, 12:06 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by honeychile
(I'm a case in point - I didn't pledge my legacy sorority, as wonderful as they were!).

Me either. I actually didn't pledge any of my legacy sororities.

ztabchbum · #7 06-24-2004, 10:32 AM

Ok, I did pledge my legacy sorority. What was even harder for me was the fact that I went to my mom's school as well and she was president of zta while she was there (she also served in MANY other offices...).

I thought, at first, I'm only being invited back because I'm a (double) legacy. And the reason I thought this was because I got dropped by the other 5 organizations just after the 1st round. ZTA was my only choice from the beginning, but I too felt that the only reason I was there was because I'm a legacy.

SO NOT TRUE! I learned the next year how wrong I was. We dropped a legacy after the 2nd round. We would have dropped her after the 1st round had she not been a legacy, but we respect the rule to invite them back again. We did, we tried really hard, but in the end, she was MUCH happier in another house.

You'll find the house that's best for you, whether it's the one you're a legacy to or not. Good luck with everything and feel free to PM me any time.

OtterXO · #8 06-24-2004, 12:46 PM

I totally agree with what everyone here has said. My chapter has dropped legacies because they weren't a good fit with our house-but we did give them extra consideration. No chapter is going to give you a bid based ONLY on the fact that you are a legacy-so don't go into rush thinking that. I also don't think that another house is going to drop you based on being a legacy to another house-I remember being very happy when we 'stole' a triple legacy from another house! From what I've read on here, in the south you may be 1 of 100 legacies going through so you definitely may get a little extra consideration from the house but they will give you a bid based on YOU, not whether or not you are a legacy. Good luck in rush!

HotDamnImAPhiMu · #9 06-24-2004, 12:57 PM

I think there are a couple of ideas behind inviting a legacy back at least once:

(1) your mom/sister/grandmother was an ABC. Obviously she had the ideals ABC looks for, and chances are, since you're a relative, you do too.

(2) you may be so nervous -- or the sisters may be! at my college we got legacies through so rarely WE were more nervous than THEY were during rush! -- that a 2nd time around will ensure everyone got a chance to calm down and be themselves.

(3) ABC owes the sister. ABC is only as strong as its women, and as much as sorority members owe their sororities, their sororities owe their members, too. Making sure they take a good long look at a sister's legacy is ABC's way of ensuring the sister doesn't feel slighted -- or like ABC thinks it's "too good for my daughter."

KappaKittyCat · #10 06-24-2004, 02:49 PM

Ditto everybody else.

If you get a bid from a sorority, it's because the members want you to be their sister. 'Nuff said.

FSUZeta · #11 06-24-2004, 04:12 PM

legacies were hotly sought after commodities not only by the legacy sorority but by the other sororities on campus. then there have been posts where legacies were dropped by some houses because they(the other sororities) were concerned that she (legacy) would eventually drop those houses in preference to joining her legacy house. it depends on the campus and the girls in the houses at the time one goes through fornal recruitment. just keep an open mind & be dazzling to all the chapters. your legacy house might be the perfect match or another house might be-you'll never know until you meet the members.

if the topic of you being a legacy comes up in the conversation during recruitment, have a pat answer ready. something like,"yes, i am a legacy to abc, but my mom has put no pressure on me to join abc. i am keeping an open mind and she is too."
best of luck to you and have fun!!

ISUKappa · #12 06-24-2004, 05:13 PM

I was a legacy and pledged where I was a leg at. During my undergrad there were times where I did feel like the only reason I got in the chapter was because I was a legacy but that had more to do with a few members as opposed to the entire chapter. And what really helped me with that was the reminder that while I was only and undergrad for four years, I'm a Kappa for life!

You are under no obligation to reveal where you are a legacy at if you are asked during recruitment. If you want to say, a response such as FSUZeta suggested is perfect. Stress that you're keeping an open mind and are looking for which chapter will fit you best.

Good luck!

OleMissGlitter · #13 06-24-2004, 05:35 PM

BE Yourself! I'm sure you will do fine!

CardinalSM · #14 06-24-2004, 05:53 PM

Being a legacy is a good thing sometimes also because other chapters are going to think you might have a leaning towards your legacy house and work harder. I know in our pledge class last fall we had an ADPi, a Phi Mu, and an Alpha Gam legacies that we all thought were going to pledge their leg houses especially since their mothers/sisters were Greek at our school. But they all told us afterwards that while they gave their legacy orgs a harder look, they knew where they belonged.

ISUKappa · #15 06-25-2004, 12:29 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ktkennyd
... However if you are flat out asked if you are a legacy DO NOT lie! Lieing is the worst thing you can do during recruitment because you usually get caught if not at that time, but later on and no one likes a liar.

I'm not saying she should lie. I'm saying she shouldn't feel like she has to answer if she is asked. She can simply say, "I prefer to not say. Even though I'm a legacy, I'm keeping an open mind about all the houses."

Personally, I think it's kind of $hitty when girls in chapters ask. I was dumb and naive during recruitment and was open when asked where I was a legacy at. The next day I was cut from over half the houses. Unless I had my fly down all day, I'm almost positive the reason why is becuase I shared that info. (yah yah, I know the chapters are the only ones that know why I was cut but I had a very good GPA, lots of activites and leadership experience and some very good conversations at most of the houses. I mean, I know I didn't gain my sense of fashion until after I had been in the house a few years, I didn't think I dressed that bad to get cut that hard!)