What Do You Do?

Diva_01 · #1 01-26-2004, 11:46 PM

Say the only person you have ever loved was in jail for three years. He has told you that he was okay with being friends and you having relationships with other people as long as you were honest with him, however, he is making some life changing decisions (actually utilizing his jail time and making a change

), such as making a new profession for himself and setting goals for when he is released. He has decided that the next woman he chooses to be with will be based on a relationship (and friendship) without sex until they make a total commitment to each other, even if that means waiting until marriage. You know you love this man, but you don't know if you can wait three years. However, if you become involved with someone else, he may choose someone else to settle down with and you may have missed your chance.

So...What do you do?

tld221 · #2 01-27-2004, 01:15 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Diva_01
Say the only person you have ever loved was in jail for three years. He has told you that he was okay with being friends and you having relationships with other people as long as you were honest with him, however, he is making some life changing decisions (actually utilizing his jail time and making a change ), such as making a new profession for himself and setting goals for when he is released. He has decided that the next woman he chooses to be with will be based on a relationship (and friendship) without sex until they make a total commitment to each other, even if that means waiting until marriage. You know you love this man, but you don't know if you can wait three years. However, if you become involved with someone else, he may choose someone else to settle down with and you may have missed your chance.

So...What do you do?

i'd wait until u see this in effect. people make decisons and "changes" but u dont know until it actually happens.

3 years is a long time...and while hes making changes in his life, so will you. he can be the "one," but youre probably "the one" for someone else out there. so if u wait around for him, you may miss your chance--with someone else.

of course, maybe you should stay around, be his ride or die chick or somethin. but how u know hes going to run iinto ur arms when he gets out? i mean, he says hes okay with you having other relationships. only guys i know that say that to their SO's is when theyre eithre looking to get out the relationship, or want to throw it back in ur face if it ever comes up.

he's talking the talk...will he be walkin the walk 3years down the line? and will u still love him after 3 years? no one knows. just live and see what happens.

jus my .02

Diva_01 · #3 01-27-2004, 01:23 PM

I agree. I told my girl that she can't put her life on hold because of a mistake that he made, and that's how I am. If its meant to be it will be...

Life has a way of righting its wrongs, so live. We are too young to not have fun...

ClassyLady · #4 01-27-2004, 04:59 PM

I think I'd tell him to holla at me when he gets out. Not trying to be smart, but honestly, I would be a friend to me and then wait to see what he does when he comes home. A lot of guys make "life changing decisions" when they're locked up, but when they come home it's a different story. It's easy to study for a profession and be truly devoted to God when you are in jail. But when you come home and you can't find a job, and your friends aren't your friends any more, a lot of that stuff goes right out the window.