Holiday "brag letters"

AchtungBaby80 · #1 01-09-2004, 01:07 PM

I know it's a little late to post about this, but I didn't think about it earlier since GC was down and all. My family usually gets 2, but this year we only got the one from my stepdad's cousin in DC...but boy, it did not disappoint! I would post it but I don't want anyone to puke, because this is the same guy who last year mentioned exactly how much he made that year (OK, we're all jealous--he doesn't need to rub it in!). Did any of you all get any good ones this year?

DeltAlum · #2 01-09-2004, 01:09 PM

We always get several.

The highlight is generally from a former college girlfriend and her husband with whom we are still friends.

He is just a hoot and it is always hilarious. I look forward to it every year.

ISUKappa · #3 01-09-2004, 01:26 PM

The one that always makes our family laugh is one from my oldest sister's friend. She's a very nice lady, but kind of considers herself (and her husband and 3 kids) an honorary family member. She invited herself (and her husband and 1 kid) to my middle sister's baby shower last year the day of the shower--which was a 3 hour drive away from where they live!

Her's are classic though. Short, choppy, misspelled sentences going on about each kid, each accomplishment, each mundane detail (one year she went into great detail about her gall bladder surgery) set in about 9-point type, filling up an entire page. It's one of the most painful things I've ever seen a college graduate write! [example: Suzy is 8. Suzy is in 3rd grade. She likes dolls. She got a doll for her birthday. Suzy likes dance. and on and on and on. . .] The lady would definitely benefit from a few sessions with Schoolhouse Rock!

ThetaGrrl · #4 01-09-2004, 01:36 PM

I have the worst brag letter story...

An acquaintance of mine started hers out by telling IN DETAIL about giving childbirth last summer. Now, we all should have quit reading after that little train-wreck, but then she goes on to say how she's pregnant again (complete with details on the actual conception).

Three words...

TOO MUCH INFORMATION

CrimsonTide4 · #5 01-09-2004, 01:37 PM

this is a funny thread. . .can you all post the letters. Maybe not that pregnancy one though.

Hootie · #6 01-09-2004, 02:00 PM

You know you're desperate for attention when you send out holiday brag letters, with family photo to people you haven't talked to in 10 years...

I saw one on my parent's table and it was from someone they hadn't heard from in about that long. It was sorta weird.

KillarneyRose · #7 01-09-2004, 02:08 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by AchtungBaby80
I would post it but I don't want anyone to puke, because this is the same guy who last year mentioned exactly how much he made that year (OK, we're all jealous--he doesn't need to rub it in!). Did any of you all get any good ones this year?

C'mon Dana! After that, you HAVE to post it! I swear on the great DZ pink lycra catsuit that I won't puke!

honeychile · #8 01-09-2004, 02:13 PM

I swear on my azure blue catsuit, I like the Christmas letter! I/We've only received 2 or 3 over the years which were totally obnoxious, but for the most part, it saves the sender a lot of time - if it's thought out well. I know that when my dad passed away, I simply could not write that on every card, so the Christmas letter was a godsend to me!

Quote:

Originally posted by ThetaGrrl
I have the worst brag letter story...

An acquaintance of mine started hers out by telling IN DETAIL about giving childbirth last summer. Now, we all should have quit reading after that little train-wreck, but then she goes on to say how she's pregnant again (complete with details on the actual conception).

Three words...

TOO MUCH INFORMATION

There is only one way to handle these. After sitting through three videos of friends giving birth, I now say that I will only watch the birth video if I can watch a video of the conception first.

Strangely, no one has taken me up on my offer!

ThetaGrrl · #9 01-09-2004, 03:01 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by honeychile

There is only one way to handle these. After sitting through three videos of friends giving birth, I now say that I will only watch the birth video if I can watch a video of the conception first.

Strangely, no one has taken me up on my offer!

LMAO! That is quite possibly the funniest thing I've heard all morning!

GeekyPenguin · #10 01-09-2004, 03:26 PM

I HATE THESE LETTERS. I begged my mom to let me send a sassy one out this year that said something along the lines of "Our daughter GeekyPenguin had a tough year. Her boyfriend, GPBoy, passed away in May, and the WI state labs are backed up, so she still doesn't know why. The good news is that GeekyPenguin informed us that she wants to get more in touch with her Catholic faith, so she is now attending Marquette University. We are delighted to have her closer to home and to pay $17,000 more a year in tuition than we were before."

Rudey · #11 01-09-2004, 04:13 PM

What are these letters? is it for people who don't want to buy a box of cards? so sorta like those mass emails: "Hi huys, I'm in france. hope you're having fun?"

-Rudey

jh124 · #12 01-09-2004, 04:14 PM

I will admit...I send them. But I don't brag, I try to tell it like it is. As in, we bought a new house but it reeks of stinky feet - stuff like that. I try to make them humble and humerous. This is our life, this is what we're up to. Could be better, could be worse.

polarpi · #13 01-09-2004, 04:33 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by honeychile
I swear on my azure blue catsuit, I like the Christmas letter! I/We've only received 2 or 3 over the years which were totally obnoxious, but for the most part, it saves the sender a lot of time - if it's thought out well. I know that when my dad passed away, I simply could not write that on every card, so the Christmas letter was a godsend to me!

I agree....the Christmas letter is wonderful, especially when you're like me who feels the need to write personal notes to everyone, and you send out more than 100 cards

Quote:

There is only one way to handle these. After sitting through three videos of friends giving birth, I now say that I will only watch the birth video if I can watch a video of the conception first.

Strangely, no one has taken me up on my offer!

I'll have to remember this for when my friends start having children...I can't imagine why they haven't taken you up on the offer, honey!

OleMissGlitter · #14 01-09-2004, 04:47 PM

My parents recieve one every year from this one family with whom they are friendly with in New Orleans. Anyway, this family (no names to protect their innocence), writes the craziest stuff. This year we got to learn how Matt, who's a junior in highschool, is no longer taking hormone shots to grow because in the past 5 years he's grown 4 inches. Then the mother wrote about how Matt wants to attend a university that has an engineering program even though he is being tutored for math right now.

She then writes about herself and from all those years of carrying her teaching bag on her left shoulder she had to finally get surgery and she is enjoying her new shoulder! She also wrote this, which broke my heart, about her daughter who attends Mercer in GA and how she is a sophomore but she didn't get into a sorority this year for the second time and her two roommates are Chi O's and that is all she really wants to be! I was like, oh my gosh! How rude! Then she wrote that all her husband does besides go to work is play the stock market. It was absolutely the most sappy, dorky, letter alive. I would have been mortified if that was my mother who wrote a letter like that. Oh, one more thing she wrote about how she is singing in the choir at her church.

astroAPhi · #15 01-09-2004, 05:00 PM

There was this family who sent us an outrageous one every year. My dad had gone to optometry school with the husband, and his wife wrote these obnoxious letters talking about how great her husband's business was doing, how their kids were these absolutely amazing, talented, smart kids (puke)... we would sit there and make fun of the letters all the time.

Then my sophomore year of college we found out that the husband committed suicide.

We haven't gotten a letter since. He was a really nice man, his wife was just a bit stuck on herself.