Dating Commandments

CrimsonTide4 · #1 03-17-2003, 04:53 PM

Today I was driving and was thinking of my Dating Commandments. . .

I. Thou shalt not wear a jheri curl, braids, or an unruly afro.

II. Thou shalt not have gold in thy mouth or excess of the "BLING" on thy hands or around thy neck.

III. Thou shalt not have more than one baby mama.

IV. Thou shalt not think books are boring. Thou shall not have more pornos than books.

V. Thou shall be gainfully employed.

VI. Thou shalt not be a former resident of the state penal system.

VII. Thou shalt not EVER lift thy hand to me unless it is to caress me or hug me.

VIII. Thou shall have a strong spiritual base and be lead by God to be the man of the house as God has decreed in the Bible.

IX. Thou shalt have goals and dreams that you are actively working to accomplish as well as respect my goals and dreams.

X. Thou shall be romantic and spontaneous, have a great sense of humor, and be adventurous,

RedefinedDiva · #2 03-17-2003, 06:07 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by CrimsonTide4
III. Thou shalt not have more than one baby mama.

Thou shalt not have more than one (two, at the most) baby with aformentioned baby momma unless thou hast been wed.

Honeykiss1974 · #3 03-17-2003, 06:19 PM

XI. Thous shall not have hair that is longer than mine.

CrimsonTide4 · #4 03-17-2003, 07:08 PM

IIIb. Thou shall not have ANY kids out of wedlock at all if approaching me (CT4).

Dionysus · #5 03-17-2003, 08:21 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by CrimsonTide4
Today I was driving and was thinking of my Dating Commandments. . .

I. Thou shalt not wear a jheri curl, braids, or an unruly afro.

II. Thou shalt not have gold in thy mouth or excess of the "BLING" on thy hands or around thy neck.

III. Thou shalt not have more than one baby mama.

IV. Thou shalt not think books are boring. Thou shall not have more pornos than books.

V. Thou shall be gainfully employed.

VI. Thou shalt not be a former resident of the state penal system.

VII. Thou shalt not EVER lift thy hand to me unless it is to caress me or hug me.

VIII. Thou shall have a strong spiritual base and be lead by God to be the man of the house as God has decreed in the Bible.

IX. Thou shalt have goals and dreams that you are actively working to accomplish as well as respect my goals and dreams.

X. Thou shall be romantic and spontaneous, have a great sense of humor, and be adventurous,

Thou Shalt not boss me around. I'm your girlfriend, not your daughter.

Thou Shalt not demean me. If you do so I'll make YOU cry.

Thou Shalt not eat up all of my food without asking me. If there's a last cupcake, chicken breast, cup of juice, etc. PUH-lease tell me ahead of time. Nothing pisses me off more than having my mouth water for something to find out someone ate it up!

Thou Shalt not hook up with my friends.

Blue Violet · #6 03-17-2003, 09:45 PM

..I couldn't resist

Thou SHALL kiss me "first"
Thou shall make sure I am "finished" before you fall asleep!

1savvydiva · #7 03-18-2003, 05:47 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Blue Violet

Thou shall make sure I am "finished" before you fall asleep!

LOL!!!

Thou shalt not get my number if you preface your introduction with "Ay gurl, what yo name is?

Thou shall put in as much work as I do

Thou shalt not hog the remote

Thou shalt not try to talk to ME when the game is on!

Thou shall clean up the kitchen (or at least help) if I cook!

Thou shalt NOT leave your dirty clothes on the floor

Thou shalt NOT leave the toilet seat up

Thou shall cherish me at all times
Thou shall allow yourself to be cherished by me likewise!

DeltaBetaBaby · #8 03-18-2003, 06:01 AM

Thou shall not whine about me going with male friends to do things you don't like (shopping, theater, etc.) unless you are ready to back that up by taking me yourself.

Thou shall not think that make-up sex is a substitute for an actual apology.

Thou shall engage in morning nookie, if I so choose, on days that we don't have to get up.

Thou shall make me breakfast after aforementioned nookie, even if we are at my place.

Edited to add:
Does anyone know the difference between "shall" and "shalt," or in which context each is used?

lil_sunshine · #9 03-18-2003, 01:12 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Honeykiss1974
XI. Thous shall not have hair that is longer than mine.

The only time thou shall have longer hair than mine is if it's in locks! That way, I can twirl mine fingers in thy hair!

CrimsonTide4 · #10 03-18-2003, 01:12 PM

I said DATING not SEX!!

9dstpm · #11 03-18-2003, 02:36 PM

Thou shall have an understanding of the Lifetime channel. You are not required to watch it with me, but please do not complain when I watch.

Thou shall also be quiet when the Lifetime Movie is on.

DeltaBetaBaby · #12 03-18-2003, 04:31 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by CrimsonTide4
I said DATING not SEX!!

Oh...sorry to hijack your thread, but I haven't had quality time with the man in a few weeks, so I have one thing on the brain.

ClassyLady · #13 03-18-2003, 04:31 PM

Thou shalt NEVER reach for my remote control without asking.

Thou shalt not talk during Trading Spaces.

Thou shalt not have braids, locks, an S-curl, a jheri curl, or an afro. (I need a man with a hair cut.)

Thou shalt not touch me with your feet.

Thou shalt never curse or use any obscenities towards me.

FeeFee · #14 03-18-2003, 05:05 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ClassyLady

Thou shalt not talk during Trading Spaces.

Unless you are a big fan of Trading Spaces like me.

Thou shall know how to properly conjugate a verb when speaking and writing.

Thou shall practice proper dental hygiene.

Thou shalt not use a plethora of obscenities when speaking to me.

Thou shalt not have a mouth full of gold teeth in the mouth.

Thou shall know how to dress properly for occassions.

Thou shalt not kiss and tell.

Thou shall display proper etiquette.

lil_sunshine · #15 03-18-2003, 05:50 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by FeeFee
Thou shall know how to properly conjugate a verb when speaking and writing.

Thou shall practice proper dental hygiene.

Thou shalt not use a plethora of obscenities when speaking to me.

Thou shalt not have a mouth full of gold teeth in the mouth.

Thou shall know how to dress properly for occassions.

Thou shalt not kiss and tell.

Thou shall display proper etiquette.

AMEN TO THAT, my fellow bone jiggling partna!!!!!!!!!

Thou shall not disrespecteth me in public nor in front of thy parents or other family members. If I sense any sign of disrespect, thou shall be prepared to either have their DAYUM BONES JIGGLED or be beaten by mine pimp stick!!!