Would You have A Problem With This?

DeltaSigStan · #1 03-12-2003, 09:58 PM

We are not able to have socials/exchanges with our sororities because we're too small. Well, our UCSD chapter, we recently found out, has been having exchanges and socials with our sororities, and even go on walk arounds to our sorority houses. They do not invite us, or even tell us.

The problem is that no one in my chapter cares. Well, they don't care about rush, community service, greek community participation, greek week, or anything else either (all they wanna do is party), but this is the particular subject. They don't care to address it, it's always "whatever".

Would you find something wrong with that? I think UCSD is being very disrespectful because they know that we can't have socials. I mean, UCSD has sororities too....

chideltjen · #2 03-12-2003, 10:34 PM

i personally have an issue with it because something similar has happened to us. We hold our philanthropy ever fall for all fraternities in IFC. The fraternities know about it and usually participate. Good times. However, for the past 2 years, another sorority in Davis has been holding a similar philanthropy on the same day as ours. And they continue to invite OUR fraternities. What's worse is that our fraternities actually go down there and participate. It got so bad the first year we had to reschedule the whole event cuz only two of our own fraternities wanted to participate in our philanthropy.

I don't understand why all the fraternities on one campus would suddenly blow off one of their own sororities to participate in a philanthropy off campus.

bottom line... yeah it would bother me.

James · #3 03-12-2003, 11:01 PM

ITs wrong on so many levels. Extremely disrespectufl. I would contact their PResident right away and either work something out with him so you can play also . . . or in the end tell him that if you don't play also, he will have to stop playing. i.e. You'll make them stop.

Evil bastards. Thats just wrong.

James · #4 03-12-2003, 11:17 PM

Look dude. they are playing in your sandbox (campus) with your toys (sorority girls) and not even inviting you to play. How messed up is that. Christ, if I were in your chapter they wouldn't do that, every time I saw one of them I would make them so uncomfortable and fearful they wouldn't be coming around . . .

Either they make arrangements for you to play also, or else they lose their campus privelages.

If your president doesn't have the balls, I would do it yourself. First be nice and get them to agree to play with you . .. if not tell them in no uncertain terms you will go directly to the Greek Advisor. In no ways are other chapters allowed to come on campus like that. The liability is incredible and most importany you are not getting anything out of it.

Quote:

Originally posted by DeltaSigStan
Thanks (hope you're not kidding lol)

Once again, the thing is that when I bring it up to the prez or anyone else, I always get:

"Whatever"

"I'm Over It"

"It's not a big deal"

BSUPhiSig'92 · #5 03-12-2003, 11:54 PM

Stan, do have a chapter advisor or some other involved alum that might be able to help out with this? I would think they might want to give your Exec a kick in the butt.

DeltaSig · #6 03-13-2003, 02:10 AM

Stan remember it only takes one to bring about change. Having u as a brother gives me inspiration since I'm not active and working as an alum (going to a cc this semester to save money). As long as we have brothers like u we'll never die. IF there are others who may feel the same do something about it. Remember it only takes one to turn the tide. If u don't know what I mean by that PM me.

shadokat · #7 03-13-2003, 10:34 AM

I concur with James. They're supposed to be your brothers, and if they want to come and play in your yard, then they should invite you!! NERVE!

33girl · #8 03-13-2003, 10:46 AM

Why don't you get together w/ another fraternity and have a double mixer? There were 2 smaller groups at Clarion that used to do that all the time. Then the girls won't bitch about having to dance w/ each other LOL.

From the other side of the coin, we used to go to Slippery Rock and party w/ the Phi Kaps there, but we met them thru our SRU sisters and would NEVER have gone there and blown our sisters off!

MoxieGrrl · #9 03-13-2003, 11:48 AM

I agree with everyone else...it's just wrong!

I don't know if you are privy to his information, but find out next time they plan on having an event on your campus. Then, get your chapter together and just show up. Play it off all friendly-like, and maybe they'll pick up on the fact that you guys want to be doing these things with or without them.

Good luck with this whole deal!

Kevin · #10 03-13-2003, 12:23 PM

It's wrong AND insulting for them not to invite you. I'll agree with everyone else here. If your chapter doesn't do something about it and it bothers you, your reasons are valid. Take matters into your own hands. They are SUPPOSED to be your brothers remind them that they aren't acting like it. They could have just committed this faux pas because of lack of attention to detail (hell of a detail but it happens).

Kevin · #11 03-13-2003, 02:26 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by DeltaSigStan
I thank all of you for the support, but, honestly, I can't do much. My house is so intent on being the party house that it's FUBAR.

Example:

We knew about our basketball game vs. Phi Kap ALL WEEK. so the day comes, and "I'm too tired from playng basketball earlier", "I'm over it", "I have to go study", and other coutless excuses come into play. Once again, we had to forfeit the game. OUr sports chair is none too pleased......

Believe me, there are some individuals who are tired of the way it is and want change, but they are out numbered by those who just don't care, and have accepted that that's the way our house is going to be.

And many of the guys who want to change have also accepted it so much that they don't care anymore.

My back's against the wall here, because I exactly don't have leverage to do anything. Everything I want to do for the house is "being like all the other fraternities, and we're not in the business of making clones". I can schedule community service, try to talk to sororities for socials, but the guys won't go. I'd probably get blasted for it too.

Have you considered talking to your alums or someone at HQ? This sounds like a serious problem that could lead to something potentially as bad as a lost charter if it continues.

SoCalGirl · #12 03-14-2003, 03:11 AM

Now as far as going to your or UCSD's chapter president....BS.....this is a matter for THE SOCIAL CHAIRS!!!!!! So please go to your social chair and ask if there's been any kind of communication w/ their social chair. If there has, what's been said. I know before I graduated our chapter was forever trying to plan something, ANYTHING with our State chapter. But we always ran into major schedule conflicts (in large part due to the semester vs quarter system) or a big ole game of phone tag.

After I graduated our chapter president happened to be old friends w/ State's ADPi pres. So they started planning things together. Couldn't get together w/ our own girls that live behind ADPi though.

But it's not like there was no effort. The next president was old friends w/ some sisters from State, finally they were able to plan a sisterhood event or two.

Moral of the story...keep trying, and if you have connections with either fraternities or sororities at UCSD (hell, or even CSU San Marcos) start making some phone calls! Couple 3ways and 4ways never hurt anyone.

p.s. the sandbox and toys reference....odds are the sororities are not hosting socials at their house. So either the UCSD Delta Sigs are holding the events at 3rd party vendors or, much more likely, which ever bro's house got designated "The House" for the year. So yes, State's toys, but not their sandbox.

PhiDeltUCI · #13 03-14-2003, 03:15 AM

Oh Man,

DeltaSigStan i pmd you earlier about this, but damn, replace sdsu witn UCI and Delta Sig with Phi Delt and you have EXACTLY what i have been saying for the past month about our chapter. i feel your pain, it sucks to see something you love grinding itself into the ground.

DeltaSigStan · #14 03-14-2003, 03:51 AM

Sorry guys, I've said too much. I deleted all the posts I made in this thread except the original. I'm not trying to be a coward or anything, but the actions I'm looking to take for MYSELF (which I will not mention as to not jinx myself) might be slighted by my other posts. I can't allow certain people to see them as to not ruin what I want to do. Don't worry, they're plans for the better, but I don't wanna jinx it because it's 50/50 that they're going to be carried out.

DeltaSigStan · #15 03-14-2003, 11:32 PM

When we have this UCSD party here, do you think I should talk to the guys myself? It may be an awkward time but I need them to know that some of us feel displeasure.

BTW, the last time they had a party at our house they thrashed it and didn't clean up.