Rec writing stories

[snowflakemom]

A daughter of a good friend of mine will be going through recruitment next fall at a competitive school. Her daughter has not signed up with our local Panhellenic and doesn't plan to. The daughter has friends from HS that are currently in a sorority at that campus and is assuming she will join that one. I told her it would be very helpful if her daughter signed up with our local Panhellenic and got a rec for every group. I told her I would love to write her daughter a rec. She asked what group I was in. I told her. She said her daughter didn't want a rec for that group. :/ I do not see this ending well *sigh*

[33girl]

Be a nice person and contact the daughter yourself and ask for her resume so you can write her a rec. She shouldn't have to pay for her mom's bigoted stupidity.

[als463]

Originally Posted by snowflakemom

A daughter of a good friend of mine will be going through recruitment next fall at a competitive school. Her daughter has not signed up with our local Panhellenic and doesn't plan to. The daughter has friends from HS that are currently in a sorority at that campus and is assuming she will join that one. I told her it would be very helpful if her daughter signed up with our local Panhellenic and got a rec for every group. I told her I would love to write her daughter a rec. She asked what group I was in. I told her. She said her daughter didn't want a rec for that group. :/ I do not see this ending well *sigh*

Wow. That's just tacky that she would say something like that to you. What an insult. Is the mother Greek? I hope the daughter isn't that hateful.

[pinksequins]

It sounds like the daughter is the problem more so than her mother: D doesn't want the rec to that group; D doesn't want to sign up with the Panhell; D assumes that she will simply choose. D sounds like a snob. Her mom sounds clueless and without sufficient experience (Greek at a competitive school) to set D straight.

While you could request the resume, brace yourself for an abrupt, "No thanks, I don't like that group. They are ------". You have already kindly offered a rec. Your graciousness need go no further.

[snowflakemom]

Both mom and daughter are really nice people but really clueless I think. Mom is not Greek so she really has no idea. Daughter probably thinks that since she has friends in a certain group, she will automatically be invited to that group (and I'm sure it's possible but I wouldn't bet on it). I know daughter will find out about the reality of recruitment soon enough but probably not in time to get the recs she needs. I won't bring it up with them again. I'll update this thread when daughter goes through recruitment.

[AnchorAlumna]

Seems like every year there are one-two-three local girls who have the same ideas. We don't find out about them until the chapter requests a rec...if they have time. Sometimes they actually call us a couple of weeks before recruitment begins. Once upon a time, we had to just say "sorry, no time to get your info out to everybody," but with e-mail, I can scan and send the information in just a few minutes.
.....if they're nice and I feel like it!

[snowflakemom]

Update to this story...
Her daughter went through recruitment and had what most girls would consider a great recruitment. However, she was released by the two chapters she really wanted (that she had friends from high school in) so she was not very happy. She did keep a full schedule every day and did end up in one of the "popular" groups. She finally decided she was happy with the sorority she joined even though it wasn't one of the two that she wanted.

Interesting experience from a rec writer's point of view.

[FSUZeta]

Very interesting. Thanks for the update.

[pinksequins]

Well, step one on the road to adulthood. I hope she learned a little bit from this experience -- don't ever assume anyrhing and you don't always get your way. Thank you for updating.