Re-Pledging?

[cdrewsurf]

Hi,

Last fall I went through FR and I received and accepted a bid to a great sorority. About three weeks before initiation, I had to de-pledge due to family and financial issues. The pledge mom, vp of financial, scholarship chair, as well as many others, were aware of the details of my situation. I was not able to come up with the money and had to leave. I now have the money and things with my family are much better . I was wondering if re-pledging this sorority would be possible, or if I had to go through FR again (which is next weekend)? If it is possible to re-pledge, should I contact the sorority or my greek life office at school? Any information on this subject would be greatly appreciated!

Thanks

[crosscaravan]

I have no experience with re-pledging myself, so take what I have to say with a grain of salt, but I'm going to throw my two cents in here...

- I think you'll be eligible for this formal recruitment, since it's been a year since you pledged (unless the timing is different because of how far into the new member period you were - I wouldn't know, due to lack of experience). I don't think it would hurt for you to register, so you may as well pay a trip to the Greek Life office and speak to someone there about your situation. If you end up having to register, well, you'll already be there to do it!
- That said, you're not guaranteed a bid, even with your former chapter. That's not to say they aren't understanding young women - I've never met any of them personally, so I really can't make any judgments of them - but there may be some who could be skeptical about it if you've had to de-pledge because of outside circumstances already, even if you have organized your finances in advance and worked things out with your family. It's just human nature to think that problems from the past might crop up again.
- If you do go through formal recruitment, you should probably be prepared for a healthy dose of skepticism coming from people in chapters that you met the first time you went through. You and your former sisters may know the details of your situation, but most likely others won't - so there may be more than just a few girls who are trying to figure out why you're doing this again, and there may be some who make up their own minds before hearing what you have to say.
- Additionally, the dynamics of the chapters could have changed with the addition of the new member class you would have been a part of, and anyone who came through in the spring. You might end up being surprised by what you find!

First and foremost, though, you should make use of the resources you have on campus. Go to your Greek Life office. Double-check to make sure contacting your ex-sisters wouldn't get them in trouble with formal recruitment coming up so soon. With so many things that differ from person to person and campus to campus, there's really not much we can do for you on a message board, aside from give you the usual generic advice.

[Always AlphaGam]

Originally Posted by cdrewsurf

Hi,

Last fall I went through FR and I received and accepted a bid to a great sorority. About three weeks before initiation, I had to de-pledge due to family and financial issues. The pledge mom, vp of financial, scholarship chair, as well as many others, were aware of the details of my situation. I was not able to come up with the money and had to leave. I now have the money and things with my family are much better . I was wondering if re-pledging this sorority would be possible, or if I had to go through FR again (which is next weekend)? If it is possible to re-pledge, should I contact the sorority or my greek life office at school? Any information on this subject would be greatly appreciated!

Thanks

This would be something you should discuss directly with the sorority ASAP.

[DubaiSis]

Start with your old friends, and I'd do that right away before they are really tied into strict silence. Even now they may not be able to tell you much, but you might be able to read between the lines about what they're feeling.

You may be able to just pick up where you left off, and depending on how competitive your campus is and how full your old chapter is, I could foresee some scenarios that would make it quite easy on you. But they may not want any part of you. I'd probably try to find that out now so you're not surprised in a couple weeks.

[Always AlphaGam]

Originally Posted by crosscaravan

I have no experience with re-pledging myself, so take what I have to say with a grain of salt, but I'm going to throw my two cents in here...

- I think you'll be eligible for this formal recruitment, since it's been a year since you pledged (unless the timing is different because of how far into the new member period you were - I wouldn't know, due to lack of experience). I don't think it would hurt for you to register, so you may as well pay a trip to the Greek Life office and speak to someone there about your situation. If you end up having to register, well, you'll already be there to do it!
- That said, you're not guaranteed a bid, even with your former chapter. That's not to say they aren't understanding young women - I've never met any of them personally, so I really can't make any judgments of them - but there may be some who could be skeptical about it if you've had to de-pledge because of outside circumstances already, even if you have organized your finances in advance and worked things out with your family. It's just human nature to think that problems from the past might crop up again.
- If you do go through formal recruitment, you should probably be prepared for a healthy dose of skepticism coming from people in chapters that you met the first time you went through. You and your former sisters may know the details of your situation, but most likely others won't - so there may be more than just a few girls who are trying to figure out why you're doing this again, and there may be some who make up their own minds before hearing what you have to say.
- Additionally, the dynamics of the chapters could have changed with the addition of the new member class you would have been a part of, and anyone who came through in the spring. You might end up being surprised by what you find!

First and foremost, though, you should make use of the resources you have on campus. Go to your Greek Life office. Double-check to make sure contacting your ex-sisters wouldn't get them in trouble with formal recruitment coming up so soon. With so many things that differ from person to person and campus to campus, there's really not much we can do for you on a message board, aside from give you the usual generic advice.

I don't know...I've seen/heard about so many cases where the Greek Life office are just clueless about things NPC. It really depends on where she goes to school.

I'm not schooled on all things NPC Green Book but the bid she accepted should be good and binding for one calendar year and may be re-pledged within that time. We had a girl who found herself in a similar situation in the Fall but Initiated in the Spring (we did COB) because her bid was still good. I know the OP's case is different because she's approaching the one year mark very soon.

The chapter might just give their sorries and best wishes to her, but I really think she should contact the sorority as soon as possible.

[Lightning Bug!]

I don't want to get your hopes up, but this happened to a very close friend in my pledge class, who was someone I'd known in middle school from a summer program, and then was in my rush group freshman year. She and I ran to the house together and were the first ones there after receiving our bids.

The circumstances were different - basically she was a top student who did not perform to her or her parents' expectations her first semester in college. Basically a very smart girl who did a little too much staying out late with that first taste of freedom, and when the grades came in, her parents abruptly said "no more dues." Instead of getting a job to pay her own dues and work out a payment plan with the chapter, she decided to depledge the week before initiation and get her act together. She parted on excellent terms with the chapter and her pledge class - basically everyone was heartbroken. We all loved her, but we understood her decision (we had fun but were not an over-the-top party sorority, so we also were concerned about her grades (she was super, super smart) and partying too hard), and our officers very specifically told her that they hoped she'd be back. We all cried our first couple of days of initiation week, we were so sad and shocked she wasn't with us.

She did extremely well academically the second semester, so her parents said if she wanted to rerush in the fall of her sophomore year, they'd support her financially as long as she kept her grades up. She went through rush all over again (I do not know the details of whether she had the option to repledge without rushing or whether she wanted to reconsider her decision), it was very hard for us to see her during rush rounds and not run over and hug her, and she repledged with us that fall and initiated with her new pledge class.

The point I want to emphasize again is that it was a big deal when she had to depledge, and pretty much the entire chapter, from President to Pledge Class Chair to Pledge Class, begged her to do whatever she could to make it back home to us. And we were totally sincere - without going into Membership Selection - given how well she did second semester, there was no real debate at all about wanting her back when she went through rush her second time.

So I guess what I'd ask you is did you get any signals like this from your chapter when you de-pledged? If so, then yes, as others recommended, you should contact the sorority ASAP to tell them you are re-rushing, before silence begins. They will not be able to promise you a bid, but if you want to rejoin, I think this is one specific instance where they should know that before rush. If they are nice girls, they are most likely not going to run out and tell the other sororities not to bother with you because you're going XYZ again. They may also know if you do have to go through rush again or not (probably yes, but maybe not).

And you never know, you might change your mind in rush - I'd at least keep your mind open, should you end up with options. Some other chapters may know what happened at XYZ, and others may just come out and ask you, but if you are not at a super competitive school, it might not hurt you too much - my friend who rerushed had a full party list every round, but I did not go to a super competitive school, and she was a real stand out in rush parties. And she didn't dwell on the past - she made it as clear as possible, when asked, that what happened then was not going to crop up again. Anyway, again, I don't want to get your hopes up, but I think the terms on which you parted with the sorority are sort of key here.

[crosscaravan]

Originally Posted by Always AlphaGam

I don't know...I've seen/heard about so many cases where the Greek Life office are just clueless about things NPC. It really depends on where she goes to school.

That's true. I mostly meant she should check with the Greek Life office about the silence rules first - since they can differ from campus to campus. Sorry if that wasn't clear! My chapter has had issues with being hit with rush infractions when PNMs approach us about anything, even when we just give them the standard "Sorry, we're not supposed to talk about that at this time," and since formal recruitment is due to start at her campus next weekend, they may already be in the really strict part of their silence period. I'd hate to see something like that happen elsewhere, especially in a case like this where it's not a "dirty rush" situation, but someone who honestly just wants information.