Life Changes

honeychile · #1 09-21-2010, 11:00 PM

We all have them, from kindergarten to first date to graduating from college to marriage, kids, divorce, etc.

I've been going through a huge one this year (since my mother died), and today was a real eye opener.

It was surreal. After all these months, the estate sale agent we hired came to prepare my mother's house - the only family home I've ever known (they lived there since 1960). My brother & I have argued a LOT about this, but I just couldn't handle this emotionally, so it was an estate sale or nothing. NINE people appeared, and spread out like a jellyfish! One to each small room, two to the large rooms, and two men for the heavy stuff. I pointed out some of the things they had troubles with, then went to work (thank heavens for self employment).

I stopped back around lunchtime, and it was amazing! It was as if Santa's elves had fixed up the workshop! Tables everywhere, one room for antiques, another for bedroom things, another for my mother's sight aids, tables of jewelry (my mother loved jewelry - I just took the good stuff), china/glassware/crystal set up in sets, Beatles records here, tools there - it was awesome! We absolutely couldn't have done this in a year, let alone four hours! It was "This is your family's life!", readied for sale.

I took a few things I hadn't been able to find before (mostly stuff that no one else would've been interested in - like 4 reels of Whipple Dam over the years), and I'm going with my brother & sil tomorrow just to see what it looked like when it was finished, and probably take some more things. I admit it, they had found my brother's teddy bear, and he (the bear) is sitting on my brother's chair at work.

While I'm thrilled that this looks like it's going to be done right, and I pray that it ALL sells well, it's such a major chapter of my life closing. Sure, the house isn't sold yet (although one of the workers is already interested), and that will be another shocker - as if having the telephone number shut off wasn't bad enough!

So, has something touched anyone else's life in such a deep way? I know that a marriage, a divorce, or that first child are all somewhat like this. Maybe somebody else has a story to tell...

PS: I'll take any & all prayers and/or good vibes for Saturday, that almost everything sells before noon! If you're in the Pittsburgh area (South Hills) and want the address, just PM me - I'm pushing this thing to the best of my ability! Or, ask me if there's something you're looking for. You might even find pictures of a very young honeychile!

unicorn · #2 09-21-2010, 11:03 PM

Just wow!

I will say prayers for you and for your family this weekend.

honeychile · #3 09-21-2010, 11:06 PM

BTW, I'll let y'all know how it went next week! I'm hoping that things like the spinning wheel & applicances go high!

VandalSquirrel · #4 09-21-2010, 11:07 PM

If you have historic photographs, diaries, maps, Sears catalogs, and so on, especially written documents, sometimes historical societies want those items. They can be invaluable to researchers and can often provide support or rejection of ideas and theories that would be lost otherwise. Sometimes you can also get a tax write off. Archaeologists and historians love wacky stuff, especially if it is hard to find. Just say no to National Geographic magazines though, so many are floating around.

If you have any Asian American items I may have a home for those, they'd be a donation to a collection but I'd help you with shipping. Figurines and small ceramic items, and anything else that may have come from China, Japan, Korea, etc., especially pre and post war.

honeychile · #5 09-21-2010, 11:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VandalSquirrel

If you have historic photographs, diaries, maps, Sears catalogs, and so on, especially written documents, sometimes historical societies want those items. They can be invaluable to researchers and can often provide support or rejection of ideas and theories that would be lost otherwise. Sometimes you can also get a tax write off. Archaeologists and historians love wacky stuff, especially if it is hard to find. Just say no to National Geographic magazines though, so many are floating around.

If you have any Asian American items I may have a home for those, they'd be a donation to a collection but I'd help you with shipping. Figurines and small ceramic items, and anything else that may have come from China, Japan, Korea, etc., especially pre and post war.

I personally have all the photographs, and much of the genealogical or history things, and I plan to do exactly that with the items I don't need. There are many left, though, but none that are Asian-themed (except a piece of china marked Nippon!). I only took my mother's favorite fur, though.

Leslie Anne · #6 09-21-2010, 11:16 PM

Wow, Honey, that's a huge undertaking. I wish you all the best for the sale this weekend. I would imagine it's really emotionally difficult to part with items from your life in that house.

Good luck!

VandalSquirrel · #7 09-21-2010, 11:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by honeychile

I personally have all the photographs, and much of the genealogical or history things, and I plan to do exactly that with the items I don't need. There are many left, though, but none that are Asian-themed (except a piece of china marked Nippon!). I only took my mother's favorite fur, though.

Forgot you're into genealogy, duh you've kept it.

Let's talk about that china from Nippon. Can you get me a picture or is that a huge hassle right now? I had pictures taken of an item I wasn't willing to donate and the collections manager was happy to have that instead of the actual piece. Some books might be considered rare or of value to a particular library collection, so you may want to look into that. Another tax write off and it will be preserved in a way, as well as accessible to others.

You've got me thinking about what happened to my father's post card collection of a specific theme. I think someone we know bought it but if not I have a plan to scan and then donate it. We still have the house, I can't wait to go through that with my sister some day, ugh.

LucyKKG · #8 09-22-2010, 01:14 AM

Can I add my life change? I graduated from college in 2009, so I'm trying to figure out what's next. For a while, I was wondering what I was going to do with my life, but now I know it's just "the next step."

I have become more motivated to pursue college counseling at the high school level. I like thinking of it as "what's next." It sounds more like a journey.

Jill1228 · #9 09-22-2010, 01:37 AM

Honeychile, I'm sending good thoughts your way. Setting up a house for an estate sale is NOT easy. I helped a friend set up one this past summer after her brother died suddenly. I kept asking what did I get myself into!

DH lost his mom in March 2009 and STILL has not been able to bring himself to go through her things

Hope things are smooth with you, hon

honeychile · #10 09-22-2010, 10:45 AM

Thanks, everyone! We actually went with an agent, because I'd still be at the house, sobbing, and my brother would just bring a dumpster to the house. So far, I'm really impressed with them - they take a 35%, but dig out everything, clean it, organize it, take credit cards, can deliver, etc, etc. All of the other agents I spoke with took only 30%, but didn't offer the credit cards, delivery, etc, and we had to pay extra for advertising. We really needed to have that non-emotion-driven person to do this!

Lucy, that's a HUGE life change, especially with this economy! Have you taken any of the aptitude tests available? I know that mine has changed over the years (still in the same ballpark, but a different team), and maybe get qualified for more than one career.

BraveMaroon · #11 09-22-2010, 10:56 AM

I can only imagine how tough it must be. My thoughts are with you and your family.

My mother and I have recently talked about her and my father's "stuff" - and I asked her what pieces were important to her in terms of staying in the family.

My late grandfather was a buyer, then the VP of the Home Store for a now defunct department store in Atlanta (Rich's, for those of you from that part of the world), and as a result, my parents have a lot of really, really nice furniture. And china, and silver, and crystal and linen.

When my grandmother passed away, I inherited a lot of nice pieces of furniture, her good china, some gorgeous table linens and so on.

But there's only so much space.

All of that to say, I hope your things all find a good home for someone who will enjoy them.

AnchorAlumna · #12 09-22-2010, 11:16 AM

We lost our mom in 2007 - my dad died in 2001 - and my brother simply does not want to deal with it. It would all be still there if my daughter hadn't needed a house and moved into it - thank goodness!

LucyKKG · #13 09-24-2010, 01:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by honeychile

Lucy, that's a HUGE life change, especially with this economy! Have you taken any of the aptitude tests available? I know that mine has changed over the years (still in the same ballpark, but a different team), and maybe get qualified for more than one career.

Hmm, yes, I'm sure I must've. Education was high up there. I've thought for a while that I wanted to work with students and at a school without being a teacher. I don't know if it's a huge change because I'm mostly a blank slate right now.

San Jose State has a credential program that's related and they also offer awesome internships that directly relate to this. I'm going to an info session in a few weeks.

honeychile · #14 09-24-2010, 12:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LucyKKG

Hmm, yes, I'm sure I must've. Education was high up there. I've thought for a while that I wanted to work with students and at a school without being a teacher. I don't know if it's a huge change because I'm mostly a blank slate right now.

San Jose State has a credential program that's related and they also offer awesome internships that directly relate to this. I'm going to an info session in a few weeks.

Mine always comes back within a certain group: teacher, librarian, labor negoiater (!). What's interesting are the wild cards!

Estate Sale countdown -19 1/2 hours!

ISUKappa · #15 09-24-2010, 01:11 PM

Our huge life change: going from the mid-sized city that the hub and I had lived in for more than 10 years to the small hometown where I grew up. Selling the house that he and I bought seven years ago when we got married, where we had our kids and put a ton of love and sweat into (he signed the closing papers this morning, the new owners are probably moving in right now) and moving into a rental in our new town to save money. Going from a dual-income family to a one-income family which means I went from a working mom to a stay-at-home mom. The husband is going from a full-time engineering job to part-time engineering and full-time farming. My oldest is starting school in our new town.

It's a huge adjustment and we're still in the process of getting settled.