Boy of interest

#1 06-16-2010, 07:55 PM

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IrishLake · #2 06-16-2010, 08:03 PM

Height means diddley to me. I didn't date anyone taller than me until I met my husband. He's 6'4 and I'm 5'10. Age means a lot though. I found guys that much older than you at this point in your life and theirs... it makes it difficult. Not such a big deal down the road though.
If you're really good friends, then just ask him about the God comment and the car issue. Shouldn't be a big deal.

DrPhil · #3 06-16-2010, 08:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atrainer89

Hello,

So I am wondering if this seems shallow of me. I am interested in this guy. He is about 5.5 years older then me. I'm almost 21, so it wouldn't be too bad of an age range. Only problem is he might be an inch or two taller than me (i.e he is short for a guy). He has blue eyes which is really nice, and he also doesn't have a car I think he said he had a motorcycle and a bike. I really don't want have to pick him up all the time. and Not sure how comfortable I'd feel with him driving in a motorcycle esp when I like to wear dresses when going out.

The other issue is on his fb interest, he says he is interested in God O.O I'm wondering how far he'll go sexually wise. I know some people like that say they're waiting til marriage. I def haven't. We are really good friends as well.

QFP.

What's your question?

LucyKKG · #4 06-16-2010, 08:08 PM

Yeah, I'll agree with IrishLake. Age may be "nothing but a number" but most people are in very different stages of their lives. Most 21-year-olds are still in school, possibly living with parents, and definitely busy with schoolwork. Someone who's 26 may have gotten a serious job and lives in a decent apartment (wishful thinking).

This didn't really click for me until I met a friend about a year ago and thought he was cute or whatever. Turns out he's in a totally different place and doing other stuff with his life.

ree-Xi · #5 06-16-2010, 08:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atrainer89

Hello,

So I am wondering if this seems shallow of me. I am interested in this guy. He is about 5.5 years older then me. I'm almost 21, so it wouldn't be too bad of an age range. Only problem is he might be an inch or two taller than me (i.e he is short for a guy). He has blue eyes which is really nice, and he also doesn't have a car I think he said he had a motorcycle and a bike. I really don't want have to pick him up all the time. and Not sure how comfortable I'd feel with him driving in a motorcycle esp when I like to wear dresses when going out.

The other issue is on his fb interest, he says he is interested in God O.O I'm wondering how far he'll go sexually wise. I know some people like that say they're waiting til marriage. I def haven't. We are really good friends as well.

His being only a couple of inches taller is a problem, why?
Aside from attraction, what is the reason for mentioning his eye color?

You're at the "I'm interested but I don;t if he is" point. You haven't dated, nor have you talked about dating. Has he asked? Have you hinted? Let's get to that point until you might have to talk about transportation to a date. As for the sex, let's wait until you've actually gone on a date. (Though if you are "really good friends," I would think that you would know his "sexual status" and how "close to God" he is.)

I'm basing these statements on how close I have been to male friends in college. If I consider someone a "close" friend, that would entail knowing a lot more about the person's beliefs on big topics like sex and religion - or in your case, if he was holding out until marriage.

Again, you have a lot of questions and seem willing to shoot him down just on assumptions. Get the facts and then make a choice.

Drolefille · #6 06-16-2010, 08:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atrainer89

Yeah. I am also planning on rushing in the Spring. I don't want him trying to discourage me from rushing either. I had a VERY VERY VERY controlling ex. He showed up at my door step randomly after me ignoring his texts and stuff. I blocked him on my phone so he couldn't contact me at any way or shape of form.

The other issue is if I start dating with the next few months that my ex will go psycho when he sees me and whatever guy it may be together. He has a very very bad anger problem.

You said you're friends with him, you should probably have SOME idea about what his views are on things if this is true.

And if your ex is threatening you need a restraining order.

DrPhil · #7 06-16-2010, 08:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atrainer89

Yeah. I am also planning on rushing in the Spring. I don't want him trying to discourage me from rushing either.

Okay.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atrainer89

I had a VERY VERY VERY controlling ex. He showed up at my door step randomly after me ignoring his texts and stuff. I blocked him on my phone so he couldn't contact me at any way or shape of form.

The other issue is if I start dating with the next few months that my ex will go psycho when he sees me and whatever guy it may be together. He has a very very bad anger problem.

If something happens, be sure to call 911 and tell your family and friends instead of logging on to GC.

IrishLake · #8 06-16-2010, 08:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atrainer89

Is it shallow of me to not be as interest in a guy because of his height? Though I feel a lot more comfortable with taller guys.

Would the guy be able to stand up to my ex if my ex ever tried to start stuff as well??

Yes it's shallow.

If your ex tries to start stuff, then you ignore it or call the cops.

DrPhil · #9 06-16-2010, 08:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atrainer89

Is it shallow of me to not be as interest in a guy because of his height? Though I feel a lot more comfortable with taller guys.

Would the guy be able to stand up to my ex if my ex ever tried to start stuff as well??

These are really rhetoricals.

It's all about what you're attracted to and how compatible you are. It doesn't matter what other people think about that.

Of course, we don't know if he'll be able to stand up to your ex. It really isn't his job to do so. It's your job to handle that problem instead of bringing a new man into your drama.

IrishLake · #10 06-16-2010, 08:18 PM

You might be almost 21, but you sound a lot younger. Just sayin...

Similarities in family stats is a coincidence, and a common one.

KSUViolet06 · #11 06-16-2010, 08:20 PM

You should get to know him so you can figure out of he is going to be compatible with you--as opposed to assuming "oh Facebook says this, so he is probably this."

Also, you really can't allow an ex to control when you start dating again, but that's just my opinion.

knight_shadow · #12 06-16-2010, 08:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atrainer89

Sorry, should have worded it better. Im in VA and we only have protective custodies. This happened awhile ago. But I'm just worried since he has a bad temper. Believe me I called my brother and he talked to my parents who are both lawyers.

You called your brother who, in turn, called your parents? You couldn't call your parents directly?

Something is rotten in the state of Denmark...

DrPhil · #13 06-16-2010, 08:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atrainer89

How can I "sound" young when you've never met me?

For the same reason this man of interest "sounds" like he may not want to sex you or want you to go through rush. All because you read his facebook.

Have you all ever interacted outside of the Internet? Please don't be a typical Internet Generationer. We don't know what you've been through but we also don't have to care. You created this thread and shared info with us. You can't possibly want our opinions on whether you seem shallow over height but not on whether you seem young and kind of silly for the rest of the things you type.

IrishLake · #14 06-16-2010, 08:32 PM

^^^ 'zactly.

MysticCat · #15 06-16-2010, 08:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atrainer89

Hello,

So I am wondering if this seems shallow of me. I am interested in this guy. He is about 5.5 years older then me. I'm almost 21, so it wouldn't be too bad of an age range. Only problem is he might be an inch or two taller than me (i.e he is short for a guy). He has blue eyes which is really nice, and he also doesn't have a car I think he said he had a motorcycle and a bike. I really don't want have to pick him up all the time. and Not sure how comfortable I'd feel with him driving in a motorcycle esp when I like to wear dresses when going out.

The other issue is on his fb interest, he says he is interested in God O.O I'm wondering how far he'll go sexually wise. I know some people like that say they're waiting til marriage. I def haven't. We are really good friends as well.

Please tell me this is a jioke.