My Big Sister

[PinkStar17]

SilverTurtle, we have the same kinda thing in my chapter, its called a Lion Pal, and our big sis's are called our carnation sister (but we usually just call them our big sis)
a lion pal writes u motivational notes, gives u small gifts like a pen with letters on it.. or a picture of the chapter..something to keep.. i remember when i was a "phi" i was given this beautiful poem written on Phi Mu stationary and it touched me so much!! all my lion pal stuff i still have..
weird thing is i picked my big sister cause we hung out allll the time!! sad how things turned out but i have other great sisters in my lineage...

[purpleturtle]

I know this is an old topic, but I could not believe that there are so many people with the same experience as me!!
Our bigs are chosen sort of the same as bid matching (you submit a list and so do the initiates, the Big/Lil Chair matches them). In my case however, there was not a perfect match on any of the lists, so I got a girl I barely even knew. I think I had talked to her maybe two times, and she was never around at any events, barely went to meetings, etc. I was really close to her big (my grandbig), who had gotten a lil in my pledge class. Since my big was MIA, she had kind of taken me on as a second little. Well, after a lot of drama with my grandbig's lil, she severed, and my grandbig sort of adopted me. (Confusing, I know.) We did Pillow/Paddle and all of the Big/Lil events together. We are soooo close now, and at our formal, when she was reading out her will I was getting really mad because I had thought she didn't include me. At the end of her speech, however, she looked at me and was crying, and read me a little speech, about how we must have been meant to be together, which we both believe has to be true, and made me cry. At senior ceremony for all the graduating seniors, I wrote out a letter to read to her, but I couldn't even read it we were crying so hard. Even though she has graduated, and lives about two hours away, we talk on the phone at least twice a week, and I have made so many visits.

Just wanted to let ya'll know there's someone else who feels your pain, but my experience worked out sooo great!!! Good Luck!
- Missy
(Sorry this post got so long- I am really bored!)

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"To the world I promise temperance and insight and courage...."

[Phi Sig Princess]

I am so sorry that this happens to so many people. I know I was very fortunate! The person that invited me along to the informal recruitment whom I was very close with became my big sister. Then when I got the opportunity to take a little I was blessed with someone that I completely bonded with! Everyone is jealous of our bond but then they compare it with their bond and get even more upset. What I recommend to people who do not have a bond with their big sis is to find people who are in the same boat as you or that want and develop your own bond. Even though it will not be with your big sis, you still want to have a good experience. We have what we call pseudo littles which are generally kept secret from their real big but it works just the same.

[erniegurl00]

We also have Guardian Angels, but we don't rotate around. Our Lil Sisters are chosen by just one person, and neither side has any say in it. I guess I'm just really fortunate since my Big Sis and I are really close. I don't know if I've told this story or not, but she was the one who introduced me to Pi Phi before rush began! I happened to hold the door for her one day while it was raining. While walking back to the dorm/house we started talking, and she invited me back to the house. That was when I met a lot of the sisters, the president, and the house mother. I know I'm really lucky to have Amy, my Big Sis. She's done so much for me! I'm just really sad to hear what some of you have gone through. I hope things look up for you in the future.

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"We're not good because we're old. We're old because we're good!"

[Emilitab]

I had a similar problem that I got a pledge mom that wasn't very active and ended up dropping. I talked to our New Member Coordinator and President during Initiation week and got a new pledge mom, who now calls me and we do stuff together. Also, she did everything for me that other pledge moms had done previously like a pledge pillow and flowers that should have been from the actual night we found out who our pledge moms were. It never hurts just to ask someone like the Membership Coordinator if there is something that can be done. If not, just find someone in the house that can act as your big sister!

[Dreamerchick]

Something somewhat similiar happened to one of my best friends. The big sis my friend got, dropped out of the sorority at the time my friend was pledging. My friend got a big sis then lost her in the crucial times of initiation. Kinda sucks... Some sisters though are thinking of adopting her though.

[Chiocutie]

I'm the New Member Educator for our chapter and that also makes me the Big/Lil Sis Chair. We have Owl Pals at the beginning of the new member period until Big/Lil Revealing and the Newbies and the Potential Big Sis's make lists of who they Pref. I match them up as best as I can to their lists but if I know they don't know the girl too well I use my best judgement. I usually watch out for who hangs out or gets along with each other the most. I tell the girls to give me ideas verbally of who they would like for their littles/bigs and then I use my best judgement. I think our New Big and Littles matched up great this past semester because for the most part they are all pretty close and have good relationships. I know our chapter very well and know everyone's personality and since I'm really close to our New Members I usually have a feel as to who would be best with who. I know when I had to pick a big I didn't really know her and was kinda like - "okay, yeah, her." For the most part she is a good big, and I think we could've been closer but there was a big age gap- I was 18 and she was 23 or 24. (I'm 19 now). But regardless we did things together. On the other hand my little sis is really special to me but I know she sent me an email earlier this summer asking why I haven't called her and how she thought I was mad at her. I felt terrible when I read it and realized that I'm neglecting my little! I explained to her that I've been so busy with work, school, initiations, etc. I haven't had time. I realized how much I missed her and have definetely made an attempt to hang out and call her more. We are both 19 and we have a lot in common so it's easier to do things together, etc. We also include my grandlittle, her little sis. We're all really close so it's so cool! Me and my little spent the day together also and we're going out tomorrow night. It just takes an effort on both sides.