Fed up with my brothers

[Bill R.]

I love my chapter to death. The brotherhood is great, the parties rock, and we excell in grades and intramurals. But there's one thing that really ticks me off, most of my brothers are REALLY gross around the house.

Here's some examples:
~If I don't do the dishes, no one else will.
~Many of the guys just drop off their coats/jackets/backpacks in the front room when they return home. They need to use their closets.
~The house is smelly. The bathrooms reek of ass after they take a dump. When I bend down to smell the carpet, I get a whiff of funky feet.
~We had new kitchen floor tile installed around a year ago. It was white, now it is a light tan color. They refuse to mop.
~They leave their dirty laundry on beds, couches, and floors.
~They leave food sitting out, instead of pitching them.
~I'm currently the treasurer, I ask them to give me checks for dues. Some hand in cash anyway. The problem is that some of them hand me musty old bills, instead of newer crisp bills.

How do I get my brothers to tidy up, without being a dick?

[Senusret I]

I think if I were you, I'd move out.

I honestly got nothing else for you. I learned at an early age that I was meant to live with very few people, for that very reason.

[knight_shadow]

Originally Posted by Bill R.

I love my chapter to death. The brotherhood is great, the parties rock, and we excell in grades and intramurals. But there's one thing that really ticks me off, most of my brothers are REALLY gross around the house.

Here's some examples:
~If I don't do the dishes, no one else will.
~Many of the guys just drop off their coats/jackets/backpacks in the front room when they return home. They need to use their closets.
~The house is smelly. The bathrooms reek of ass after they take a dump. When I bend down to smell the carpet, I get a whiff of funky feet.
~We had new kitchen floor tile installed around a year ago. It was white, now it is a light tan color. They refuse to mop.
~They leave their dirty laundry on beds, couches, and floors.
~They leave food sitting out, instead of pitching them.
~I'm currently the treasurer, I ask them to give me checks for dues. Some hand in cash anyway. The problem is that hand me musty old bills, instead of newer crisp bills.

How do I get my brothers to tidy up, without being a dick?

That's disgusting.

You may have to be a prick if they're acting like that.

[SWTXBelle]

I'm afraid your options are limited. If you could convince them of the necessity of hiring a cleaning service (which sounds like it would be hard to do) you could do that - but that won't solve the personal issues.

I moved in with my sorority sister (whom I loved) and it was a package deal - I got two other roomies. It quickly became obvious that I could either live with them and NOT USE THE KITCHEN because I was the only one who would clean it, or be an absolute harpy and try to cook. I chose to not use the kitchen - only the microwave - and got out of there as quickly as I could.

Sorry I couldn't come up with a better solution.

[violetpretty]

Are you living in the chapter house, or is this a "satellite" house in which several brothers live? How many brothers live in this house? My suggestions will vary based on the number in the house and the situation.

[Bluetiful]

You can't change the behaviors of others. The only person whos behavior you can change is your own. Once I accepted this and incorporated it into my life, things got much much easier! Basically it means that you quit forcing people to do what YOU want them to do for whatever reasons YOU may have (even if they are good reasons they are still YOUR reasons).

Come on . . . grown folks should know better. When they don't, I don't have time to play mom. Do you have time to play Dad? I'm sure you don't by your post. And if you did have time, why would you want to? Couldn't you find something better to do with your time?

I agree with Senusret. Move out and be happy. You don't have time for all this. You are only stressing yourself out unnecessarily and causing your own misery. In the end, whatever you do will all be for nothing anyway. Bet you $19.20 that they will not change their disgusting piggy little ways.

[Bluetiful]

In my experience, not living with certain people allows me to get along better with them. Might be the case with you and your brothers too.

[tld221]

Originally Posted by Bill R.

I love my chapter to death. The brotherhood is great, the parties rock, and we excell in grades and intramurals. But there's one thing that really ticks me off, most of my brothers are REALLY gross around the house.

Here's some examples:
~If I don't do the dishes, no one else will.
~Many of the guys just drop off their coats/jackets/backpacks in the front room when they return home. They need to use their closets.
~The house is smelly. The bathrooms reek of ass after they take a dump. When I bend down to smell the carpet, I get a whiff of funky feet.
~We had new kitchen floor tile installed around a year ago. It was white, now it is a light tan color. They refuse to mop.
~They leave their dirty laundry on beds, couches, and floors.
~They leave food sitting out, instead of pitching them.
~I'm currently the treasurer, I ask them to give me checks for dues. Some hand in cash anyway. The problem is that some of them hand me musty old bills, instead of newer crisp bills.

How do I get my brothers to tidy up, without being a dick?

some of these things are "normal." what else is a bathroom supposed to smell like after you take a dump?

and this is what happens when you live with a bunch of ppl in one house. i find it hard to bellieve its every brother in the house that does this - you cant be the only saint.

as treasurer, you can charge a maintenance fee and use that $$ for a Molly Maid. otherwise, tell those dudes to clean up here and there.

[nittanyalum]

Have a Mom's Weekend and scare 'em into getting the place in shape before they arrive.

[APhi4Ever]

"The bathrooms reek of ass after they take a dump."

This made me laugh! Most bathrooms do after taking a dump.

[honeychile]

Originally Posted by tld221

as treasurer, you can charge a maintenance fee and use that $$ for a Molly Maid. otherwise, tell those dudes to clean up here and there.

Originally Posted by nittanyalum

Have a Mom's Weekend and scare 'em into getting the place in shape before they arrive.

This would be my advice, especially if this is the fraternity house. Give them 2 weeks notice, and tell them to fork over the money for a regular cleaning service, or do it themselves.

And use something a bit more "industrial" than Molly Maids. They usually send two people; sounds like you need the four or five cleaners!

[BabyPiNK_FL]

OMG! Ludacris totally wrote for people with these problems...it's called "Move".

I had to dorm with 3 little druggies in my junior year. I was the only one with sufficient cleaning supplies. They never mopped, they never cleaned (even the one who washed out her turtle's tank in the kitchen sink-and turtles are illegal in our dorm due to diseases! I was so glad when it died!) The floor always looked funky and my bathmate didn't know what Comet was so help her God! There is only one thing you CAN do...move ***** get out the way! Leave them their mess to themselves!

[Lucky SC]

do you not have pledges???

this seems like an easy fix with a little pledge elbow grease

[fantASTic]

Originally Posted by Bill R.

I love my chapter to death. The brotherhood is great, the parties rock, and we excell in grades and intramurals. But there's one thing that really ticks me off, most of my brothers are REALLY gross around the house.

Here's some examples:
~If I don't do the dishes, no one else will.
~Many of the guys just drop off their coats/jackets/backpacks in the front room when they return home. They need to use their closets.
~The house is smelly. The bathrooms reek of ass after they take a dump. When I bend down to smell the carpet, I get a whiff of funky feet.
~We had new kitchen floor tile installed around a year ago. It was white, now it is a light tan color. They refuse to mop.
~They leave their dirty laundry on beds, couches, and floors.
~They leave food sitting out, instead of pitching them.
~I'm currently the treasurer, I ask them to give me checks for dues. Some hand in cash anyway. The problem is that some of them hand me musty old bills, instead of newer crisp bills.

How do I get my brothers to tidy up, without being a dick?

1). Get your own dishes, and don't use theirs. Keep yours in your room. Eventually they will wash theirs, when they run out.
2). They DO live there. I don't see a problem with book bags and coats and shoes in the main area...bedroom closets are for other clothes, not that stuff.
3, 4). If the entire house stinks, put cans of air freshener everywhere. Febreze?
5). Make a chore chart and fine brothers who don't do it, or put them on probation. (This would actually work for a lot of it, as long as your e-board agrees and backs you.)
6). Throw it away. They'll learn.
7). So? Again, just wait..they'll do it eventually. Don't do it for them.
8). Absolutely refuse cash. If they refuse to write a check, charge them late fees until they do it. And...I don't exactly see what the problem is between "new bills" and "old bills". That's a little anal retentive, just so you know.

That's all I got. Go forth!

[bellwisdom]

If this is the chapter house, maybe yaw should get a House Mom and a House Manager. Other then that I don't think there is much you can do but move out.