Smart Women being stupid in relationships...and the friends who pick up the pieces!!

[nittanyalum]

Originally Posted by AGDee

I wondered if she suspects that he is back with his wife and wants to leave it on his porch hoping that the wife finds it and "punishes" him by leaving him or making him miserable.

Yes, I'm sure that's what she thinks. And that he'll then come running into her arms, realizing that she's been the right woman for him all along...

And I agree, Jenn, you're being a great friend and I give you credit for that. Just be careful she doesn't drag you too far into her drama -- I've seen the other side of that and it's ugly.

[PeppyGPhiB]

Originally Posted by DaemonSeid

If she was really good she sell the stuff....hehehe....

any movie watchers remember the $1 sale......??

"Love's Hangover - Everything $1." I loved it! "Enjoy your skis!"

[AKA_Monet]

Originally Posted by AGDee

I wondered if she suspects that he is back with his wife and wants to leave it on his porch hoping that the wife finds it and "punishes" him by leaving him or making him miserable.

That's what I'm saying... Geez!

[likeaTREE]

JennRN,
Simply state to your friend... that as your "financial advisor" I am advising you to take one last look at the jewelry before returning it and pray about your decision.(while she is praying knock her in the head and keep it moving)LOL! (Sorry I couldn't resist) Naw but on the for real tip. If closure is what she is looking for and that is the only way she can find it then so be it. I had a friend to do the same thing... She returned a $1500 necklace and ring set to her long time "buddy" to this day I still remind her of it. In this life friends are going to do several things we don't understand and simply that is usually why you love them...

[Jimmy Choo]

Originally Posted by ThetaDancer

Just a word of encouragement...
Keep up the good work of being her friend when she is in need. I know it's not easy (and sometimes absolutely frustrating) to help a friend in this kind of situation, but I'm sure she really appreciates it.
ETA: To echo what nittanyalum said, you really can't "save" a friend in this situation. It's hard because you want to be able to make it better, and sometimes you just can't. But still being there to spend time with her and be supportive is really important.

Co-sign 100%. I have a friend who is being utterly stupid right now as well. All you can do is offer your two cents and promise to be there for them. It's hard to not get drawn in. But by doing so it shows that you care. That's the job of a friend!

[cheerfulgreek]

Originally Posted by JennRN

he's giving her jewelry

Hmmm. I wonder who's jewelry it was? His wife's? I'd give it back (unless it was new).

[xoheatherxo]

i think she should give it back and forget about him. maybe give her the book hes just not that into you...and tell her to read it!!! then make her read they call it a break up cause its broken. two really good books and it might help her and you out!

[texas*princess]

One of my best friends had an issue with a guy she was dating who was... misbehaving. He had just given her a really cute diamond necklace before all the proverbial stuff hit the fan.

You know what she did?

Took a hammer, took the necklace, and Fed-Ex'd the pieces to his office.

A bit extreme, but she said it was a good "release".

I still have the jewelry my ex's have given me, 'cause hey, they are nice pieces of jewelry! I've just mentally blocked the sentimental value that they used to have, and if someone asks where I got them, I say my parents bought it for me I don't wear them often, but I do sometimes.

I did have a TV that I literally gave away though... one X gave it to me a few years back, and when I finally had enough, I put up a Myspace bulletin: "Free 32" TV" and gave it to the first taker who agreed to come pick it up. I got a shiny new TV and I wouldn't have it any other way

[d1va25]

i have all the jewelry that my ex has given me...gold bracelets, diamond bracelets, rings, etc. when we broke up, it never dawned on me to give back the jewelry. i looked too good in it. don't be fooled, taking the items to his house and leaving it on the doorstep and ringing the bell is a way for her to try and get back at him. she knows that he and his wife (because he's still married) are still together and she's hoping to disrupt something in his present relationship and make him come back to her. who i feel sorry for is his wife, who probably has no idea that he's been in a long term relationship with another woman.