Dad kills daughter, 16 because she "wanted to be 'free'"

[Taualumna]

She wanted to be like any other teenage girl.

Aqsa Parvez, 16, who died Monday night after being attacked in her Mississauga home, wanted to hang out with friends instead of obeying her 5 p.m. curfew. She wanted to listen to rap, hip hop and R & B, which her parents didn't permit.

When is strict, too strict?

[Drolefille]

When someone dies because of it.

In all honesty the dad probably thought he was being a good father as she was the youngest of 8 and the others probably had similar rules (although the male-female rules are probably different) so even if she'd grown up with those rules until she turned 18 it's not necesssarily "too strict."

Her murder however is terrible and tragic.

[1908Revelations]

.....WTF!?!?!

[Taualumna]

Originally Posted by Drolefille

When someone dies because of it.

In all honesty the dad probably thought he was being a good father as she was the youngest of 8 and the others probably had similar rules (although the male-female rules are probably different) so even if she'd grown up with those rules until she turned 18 it's not necesssarily "too strict."

Her murder however is terrible and tragic.

You know, it's quite possible that she'd have to live with these rules even after she turned 18. With a dad like that, it would have not been likely that she'd be allowed to go away to school.

[AlphaFrog]

Originally Posted by Taualumna

You know, it's quite possible that she'd have to live with these rules even after she turned 18. With a dad like that, it would have not been likely that she'd be allowed to go away to school.

This took place in Canada, and I'm not familar with Canada's laws, but I thought that 18 was still the age of "adulthood" - she may not have been "allowed" to go away for school, but there wouldn't have been anything her dad could have done to stop her at that point. The article said she had lived in a shelter, so obviously, she would have done what it takes to get out on her own, even if that means being homeless.

[Taualumna]

Originally Posted by AlphaFrog

This took place in Canada, and I'm not familar with Canada's laws, but I thought that 18 was still the age of "adulthood" - she may not have been "allowed" to go away for school, but there wouldn't have been anything her dad could have done to stop her at that point. The article said she had lived in a shelter, so obviously, she would have done what it takes to get out on her own, even if that means being homeless.

Many of the girls killed by parents or relatives were adults over 18 years of age. In any case, when you live with your parents, whether you're 6 or 46, you're still a "child" to them and live by "their rules." Even if she lived in a shelter, it's quite possible that someone can find her, especially if she's going to school. Many immigrant communities are very tight-knit.

[AlphaFrog]

Originally Posted by Taualumna

Many of the girls killed by parents or relatives were adults over 18 years of age. In any case, when you live with your parents, whether you're 6 or 46, you're still a "child" to them and live by "their rules." Even if she lived in a shelter, it's quite possible that someone can find her, especially if she's going to school. Many immigrant communities are very tight-knit.

You're missing my point. It's possible that if she made it to 18, she would have taken off, full speed ahead - possibly to another provence on the other side of the country, and never looked back, and there would have been nothing her dad could have done to stop her.

[Velocity_14]

This is just ridiculous!!!

[nikki1920]

wow.
What a sad story.

[mystikchick]

Every time I read one of these stories, I feel so angry, both because it only fuels the perception that immigrants from South Asia are somehow backwards and cling to their barbaric customs such as honor killings (and I'm not for a moment suggesting that behavior like this man's is at all permissible), and anger because the community STILL refuses to acknowledge it, to try and empower its women not to tolerate this kind of abuse, to create support networks and help women escape these situations instead of turning a blind eye. We can only be the change we want to see in the world, nobody else can do it for us, but I don't know when the day will come that the South Asian community finally says 'enough is enough, we need to do something about this problem.'

[nittanyalum]

I also don't understand, if you don't want your children to be exposed to/adopt western ways, why move to a western nation? If he was so determined to raise his children with his culture and traditions, why leave Pakistan? Because a teenager is a teenager, no matter where they are, and they will absorb and want what they're exposed to and what their friends have and get to do.

[Munchkin03]

I hope this creep burns in hell...so, pretty much the same way I feel about any "parent" who murders their child.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by Taualumna

You know, it's quite possible that she'd have to live with these rules even after she turned 18. With a dad like that, it would have not been likely that she'd be allowed to go away to school.

Originally Posted by Taualumna

Many of the girls killed by parents or relatives were adults over 18 years of age. In any case, when you live with your parents, whether you're 6 or 46, you're still a "child" to them and live by "their rules." Even if she lived in a shelter, it's quite possible that someone can find her, especially if she's going to school. Many immigrant communities are very tight-knit.

I understand that she may not have just been able to walk out the door at 18, however at 18 she could do so legally. I didn't read more on this, but it doesn't appear there was "abuse" before hand just very strict rules. But the things many parents do are emotionally abusive.

Also many abused women return home for whatever reason, even if they say they're leaving forever. Her brother may or may not have been in on the whole thing, he may have wanted to help punish her, but not kill her. Sadly a LOT of cruel things happen in families and you don't have to be an immigrant or of a minority culture to be stuck in an abusive home.

[NinjaPoodle]

Originally Posted by Drolefille

I understand that she may not have just been able to walk out the door at 18, however at 18 she could do so legally.

Understood, however people(westerners) don't seem to realize had she done that, she will, for the rest of her life, be looking over her shoulder no matter where she fled to.

[AlphaFrog]

Originally Posted by NinjaPoodle

Understood, however people(westerners) don't seem to realize had she done that, she will, for the rest of her life, be looking over her shoulder no matter where she fled to.

Still seems like a better alternative than going back.