Lavalier?

KDcowgirl · #1 09-28-2007, 10:57 AM

One of my friends who is Greek at a different college than myself mentioned something to me the other day about wanting to get lavaliered. I had heard of this practice before from my parents, but I don't know of anyone on my campus who does it (and we are a pretty Greek school). So I was wondering, is the whole lavalier thing something people still do pretty commonly? What exactly does it involve? Is there any way to start or revive the practice on your campus if you think its a worth-while tradition?

Sugar08 · #2 09-28-2007, 11:01 AM

http://greekchat.com/gcforums/search...archid=1417487

nittanyalum · #3 09-28-2007, 11:59 AM

So since you can't haze new members anymore you haze brothers' girlfriends instead?

nittanyalum · #4 09-28-2007, 12:41 PM

To ealy, it looks like you deleted your first post, but as a side note, your chapter probably got the term "dropping" as some sort of derivative of what lavaliering actually is, a fraternity member giving his girlfriend a necklace with the fraternity's letters on it as a sign of love & commitment -- the piece of jewelry is actually called "a drop". What that's evolved into "ritual"-wise for you all, I can only imagine but don't really want to know.

And to the OP, it's difficult to have the goal of "getting lavaliered" if it's not something that originates from the fraternities on your campus. So maybe your boyfriend can be THE guy to stand up and get it started (if he's not afraid

). On my campus, lavaliering happened in a variety of ways, the bf just surprised her on a special date, we had some guys come into chapter meetings with flowers (and some came with a group of brothers, sometimes they sang) to make a big to-do presentation to her, it really depended on how each fraternity tended to handle those things on their side. The girls were just the happy recipients and then we had candlelightings on our side. So talk to the guys and tell them to step up to it!

SWTXBelle · #5 09-28-2007, 05:00 PM

I think more of our traditions should involve chocolate. Hey, it's our color, to start with!

Benzgirl · #6 09-28-2007, 05:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

I think more of our traditions should involve chocolate. Hey, it's our color, to start with!

Chocolate makes the world a happier place. I can't remember if that was part of our motto or if I was brainwashed somewhere along the way.

SWTXBelle · #7 09-28-2007, 05:14 PM

Maybe we should adopt that as a GC motto . . .

SthrnZeta · #8 10-01-2007, 08:58 AM

My school was pretty similar - we didn't called it getting dropped though, just lavaliered. It was the step before engagement for us and it definitely meant a lot - so not done very often, but often enough that we knew what it meant. We would also have a candlelight for it, as other chapters do (but ours are for friendship, lavaliere, engagement, pregnancy - that way alums can have candlelights in their chapters as well). Being lavaliered allows the woman to wear his letters and know some of the traditions also - it's as if the fraternity is adopting her into their brotherhood as well. I know TKE used to drop the guy in the pond after they would serenade the girl. We had one girl get lavaliered by a TKE at our chapter meeting and we did the candlelight for her as a surprise (at the request of the boyfriend) so he came up behind her and blew it out! Then the brothers filed in and sang to her, and then carried him out to drop him in the pond. Crazy college kids....

It was really sweet to watch though!

DeeZeeOE07 · #9 10-01-2007, 11:06 PM

Guys here drop them into a lake we have up here that is definitely gross. Guys don't sing to girls for lavaliers but I wish they did! I think that's so sweet! The only time they sing is when the new pledges sing to us for stealing their pins so they can get them back. And they have to do that in their boxers. It's pretty entertaining. What's a candlelight for friendship mean? Like becoming friends with someone or just being friends with people in general? I guess I just don't get like who would blow it out and stuff unless it's done differently.

UCFgirl · #10 10-02-2007, 12:37 AM

I was just lavaliered by my boyfriend this past April. It is definitely a HUGE deal, and we look at it as the equivalent of a promise ring (just a greek version.) I know some fraternities (like the one my boyfriend is in) do not let girls wear their letters, and only those who are sweethearts, fiances, wives, mothers, sisters, and lavaliered are allowed to wear them, especially double stitched raised letters.

Everyone gets their lavalier in a different way, and it totally depends on the guys giving it away. I know mine was given away the day before a special day for us, so I wouldn't be expecting it. I know someone else said this about their school, but here people also look down on it if you give out your letters too quickly, as it is supposed to mean that the girl is equal to your brothers.

That's my school's take on the whole issue at least

Fleur de Lis · #11 10-02-2007, 05:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeeZeeOE07

What's a candlelight for friendship mean? Like becoming friends with someone or just being friends with people in general? I guess I just don't get like who would blow it out and stuff unless it's done differently.

In my chapter it was:
once around the circle for friendship,
twice for pearldrop (like lavaliering),
three for engagement,
four for marriage,
and five for pregnancy.

My understanding is that once around for friendship is so that everyone has a chance to touch the candle before the announcement, but I really like the idea of blowing out the candle for a special friendship.

Funny story about candle passing - my chapter always wondered why there was the five times around for pregnancy. None of the sisters was married, and pregnancy was almost unheard of on the campus at all. One week, we did a candle passing and people were getting really excited on round three, then a little shocked at round four, then unbelieving for round five - ~120 actives in a small space makes for some confusion. Finally, our chapter PRESIDENT "blew out" the candle and the whole chapter went crazy. Then she yells April Fool's!! It was such a funny practical joke on all of us.

SthrnZeta · #12 10-02-2007, 10:43 AM

A Friendship candlelight is kinda hard to explain. I held a candlelight for friendship once when me and my big had a kind of falling out and I wanted to make things right. So, I put a note in the president's file with the candle and I blew it out during the candlelight to make a public announcement of sorts to my big that I hoped we were still cool and would remain close despite all the crap that went down between us. We both cried and it meant a lot to her that I did that. I hope that helps explain it a little better

You could also do a Friendship candlelight if s a sister was especially good to you and you wanted to thank her (helping you get better if you were sick, etc.). Not sure why they call it Friendhsip if you're sisters, but oh well.

DeeZeeOE07 · #13 10-02-2007, 01:52 PM

oh that's really sweet! I wish we would do something like that!

SthrnZeta · #14 10-02-2007, 06:14 PM

I think we had a similar reasoning for passing it around once for friendship but we also had the option of blowing it out for a special friendship reason. My president did a similar practical joke on us - quite funny!!!

PhrozenGod01 · #15 10-02-2007, 08:52 PM

Here's an out of the lane question,
Has anybody experienced or heard of a couple going through one of those lavaliering/dropping/pinning ceremonies, and then breaking up a short time later? I'd love to be a fly on the wall for that announcement.