whats your relationship with your big/little?

Katylovesit · #1 06-21-2007, 10:56 PM

I was just wondering if you guys are close to your big/lil?

Me and my big never really clicked but when we see each other at the house we make small talk but the only time we hung out was a week after reveal and we ate out (which she brought three of her non greek friends with her) I always thought that she was dissapointed that i was her little

ZTABullwinkle · #2 06-21-2007, 11:08 PM

I never had a great relationship with my "big," but I have a great relationship with one of my "lils" who will be my maid of honor at my wedding next year. (I am also a bridesmaid in her wedding.) I think it is up to both of you to make the best of your Big/Lil relationship.

AnatraAmore · #3 06-21-2007, 11:34 PM

I agree... out of my three lils, two of them I am very close with and the other I am still pretty close with. She jokingly calls herself my "neglected child." She was the most independent of the three and knew more sisters coming into pledging, than my other two. As a result, I spent less time hanging out with her one-on-one while she pledged. (Although we have spent lots of time together since then!)

One thing I have noticed that other sisters tended to adopt lils who really are neglected by their bigs. Sometimes the big sisters who aren't close with their lils are imitiating the relationship they had with their bigs, so if your big sister doesn't call you to hang out, call her! Maybe she's shy or feels awkward just calling you to hang out...

jennie3576 · #4 06-21-2007, 11:50 PM

i'm close as i can be with my littles. i never had a little as an undergrad, but through a program National runs, I have littes in new AST colonies (one's a chapter now!). They are long distance relationships, but very good ones at that!

DeltaBetaBaby · #5 06-22-2007, 12:14 AM

My big is one of my best friends to this day. My pledge mom, on the other hand, despises me. So you win some, you lose some.

AlethiaSi · #6 06-22-2007, 12:19 AM

I have two littles and one of them I am closer with. She is now President, the other is the President leaving office (I was President right before her.... my whole line is on exec... yay) anyway, I am closer to one and her little than to my other, but my g.little and my g.g.little on the other side i'm close with.
I hope that made sense... lol

Here is a link to another thread from the alumni forum which asks a similar question.

fifi225 · #7 06-22-2007, 12:31 AM

My little sisters make me smile every day (eventhough they probably have no idea as one is off and married and busy being awesome, and I'm so busy with work that I only see the other about once a week or so). They are seriously the two most increadable women I've ever had the privledge to know.

The two of them are twins from the same PC and are different as different can be, but we're the happiest family there ever was! we're also probably the smallest :P it's just the three of us and since my one little that's still in college is probably not going to take a little, a happy 3 it shall stay for all time.

My (unofficial, of course) big brother is a TKE and he is probably (aside from my parents) the single most positive infulence in my life thus far.

My (again unofficial) Fraternity littles are all increadable people who I make every effort to catch up with as often as I can (I'll admit, I'm better with some of them then others).

With all that awesome, I don't even need a big sister

sigtau305 · #8 06-22-2007, 04:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Katylovesit

I was just wondering if you guys are close to your big/lil?

Me and my big never really clicked but when we see each other at the house we make small talk but the only time we hung out was a week after reveal and we ate out (which she brought three of her non greek friends with her) I always thought that she was dissapointed that i was her little

My Little and I are still close. Even though He's busy been a Bank Manager as well as Being Vice-President of Our Three Rivers Region for the Fraternity, He still managed to take some time to chat with me.It's cool that we have known each other since High School and now We're in the same Fraternity.

As for my Big, I run into him on some occasion.

adpiucf · #9 06-22-2007, 04:46 PM

The only one I was ever close to I still talk to now and then.

We are assigned to be sponsors to the new members right away, so this takes away from having an opportunity to really get to know the new members before you get paired up. You're not necessarily paired with the intent to be BFF.

Although, "on paper," this relationship as a "Diamond" (Big/Lil) is supposed to formally conclude once the new member is initiated. We're not supposed to have families, etc., in order to discourage cliques.

And of course, it never works out that way b/c our members want to be like everybody else ... I finally got tired of correcting members when I would go to other chapters and hear an ADPi introduce her "Big" or refer to herself as a "pledge" (our new members are called "alphas" and have been since the early 90s). Oh well.

/rant

LatinaAlumna · #10 06-22-2007, 07:06 PM

I have good relationships with my "big" and my "lil." I am really proud of their accomplishments! I am closer to my lil, though, but that's because my big is from another chapter.

KSUViolet06 · #11 06-22-2007, 07:13 PM

My Big & I are good friends. She has 4 Littles including me and I'm close to them as well (my twin, triplet, and quad). It's hard for us to be close now because I'm an alumna and she's still active (she was a freshman when she took me & I was a 2nd semester soph). We chat via phone like once a week.

My Little is one of my best friends. My sisters joked that we were attached at the hip. When I was an active, we went to lunch like 3 times a week. We live kind of far from each other right now so it's hard for us to get together. But we talk on the phone or AIM every day. I'm going back to my undergrad school for my M. Ed. this fall and I'm really excited to be in the same city with her again.

violetpretty · #12 06-27-2007, 11:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by adpiucf

Although, "on paper," this relationship as a "Diamond" (Big/Lil) is supposed to formally conclude once the new member is initiated. We're not supposed to have families, etc., in order to discourage cliques.

I've noticed that there is way more of a problem with pledge/NM/alpha/whatever classes being cliquey than with families being cliquey. If anything, it encourages sisters of all ages to be close.

I felt isolated from my NM class, so I bonded with my big and the rest of my extended family, who I felt were much more similar to me. I haven't seen my big in a while, since she graduated two years ago, but we were very close when we were both actives. I am extremely close with my little, grandlittle and great grandlittle.

AlwaysSAI · #13 06-27-2007, 02:40 PM

My SAI big was fabulous!! She became an inactive sister of Alcha Chi Omega the semester before she joined SAI. I think that's what made her such a fabulous big. She gave me the best gifts out of my entire pledge class--everything was hand made and decorated. The final day of big/lil week, she had modge-podged a bottle with magazine adds, filled it with my favorite color of sand, and put a note in the top--calling it my "message in a bottle". Anyway, she was great. We went to dinner all the time, got really close--I called her crying on more than one occasion. The semester after I was initiated, she kind of stopped showing up for meetings and then sent an impromptu email to the chapter anouncing that she was going inactive because she had decided to move back North. She left the chapter without an editor and completely distanced herself from every single sister. I saw her on campus once and she just walked by me and waved. It kind of hurt because we used to be really close. She's at some school in Conneticut and I don't think she has affiliated with SAI or Alpha Chi up there.

Me and my SAI little are getting closer now than before she was initiated. We spend a lot of time together and she went with me to get my last tattoo. I'm really excited to have her as my little because together, I know that we can make our chapter AMAZING!!

My Phi Sigma Pi big brother become one of my closest friends. She held me when my long time boyfriend announced that he thought we had just been "casually dating" for 2 years--WHAT A COP OUT! Anyway, she was studying abroad in England this past semester and I can't wait for her to get back!!! I have missed her.

My Phi Sigma Pi little is a girl that I went to school with for 6 years before I moved in the 11th grade. We weren't close in school and we're not super close now. She's really shy and that makes it hard for me to warm up to her. She doesn't talk much, which makes it worse. She's going to make a great brother, though. I hope we get closer as she gets more used to the brotherhood.

SydneyK · #14 06-27-2007, 02:41 PM

My big is pretty much the only sister I still talk to. I never got close to my lil, since she transfered after her first year. That made me sad, so I never took another.

33girl · #15 06-27-2007, 03:11 PM

My APO big was my ex-boyfriend who I never want to see again.

One of my APO littles was a good friend before her initiation, but I haven't talked to her in a long while (she married an a-hole). My other APO little I haven't heard from since I graduated.

My ASA big works in the same building as I do. We're not close in the sense of talking every day - I think this is more our different personalities than anything else - but we do keep up to date on what's going on in each other's lives. My ASA little dropped off the face of the earth before we graduated, so my little little is basically my little. She's my best friend on the earth.