Out of Control: AIDS in Black America-- ABC special

[So blessed!]

Did anyone see the ABC special: "AIDS in Black America"?

Here's the link on YouTube:
http://www.youtube.com/results?searc...+black+america (if the link doesn't work, search under "AIDS in Black America")

It's split up into 6 very powerful segments.

If you haven't watched this, please do and share your comments.

I'm a medical student and randomly happened to see this the night before I met a Black patient who came for an HIV/AIDS follow-up blood test/counseling. She'd had unprotected sex with her boyfriend, who turned out to be bisexual. She found out he had HIV only by chance (he never told her). This woman is young and is the sole parent of a child. When I asked her why she didn't use condoms with this man (he'd behaved aberrantly for years) she looked at me and said, "I was so tired of being lonely." Basically, she *willed* her relationship to be monogamous, and ignored the glaring signs that her boyfriend was engaging in high-risk behaviors. So she didn't protect herself.

According to this special and the public health data, this is not rare. This case has been stuck in my mind and I've gotten angrier and sadder the more I've thought about it.

Otherwise saying this is a shame, what are the cultural, personal and social steps we all need to take to keep this disease from continuing to ravage the Black community (esp. Black women)?

[Exquisite5]

I saw this when it aired last week and you are correct, it is quite powerful.

As far as suggestions, I don't really know. I once heard a physician on the radio suggest that ALL AfAm women, be they married or single, should use condoms. I don't know how practical that is. I just don't see myself telling my husband that I since I don't trust that he is not sleeping with other people (when in fact I do) that I want to start using condoms. However, I have a little more protection than most women/wives because since my husband is a commisioned officer in the Navy he gets a yearly AIDS/HIV test w/o question. So if ever comes home jobless....I WILL KNOW.

Now clearly that can't protect me from the time in between testings, but as I said I trust my husband so him cheating with anyone, at this point in our marriage, is not a large concern for me.

On the whole, I think we need to stop looking to the church for guidance on this issue and start AfAm focused public health organizations that focus on this issue. Condoms need to be made ABUNDANT, but other than that I can't say I have an intelligent contribution.

[AlphaFrog]

Originally Posted by Exquisite5

I once heard a physician on the radio suggest that ALL AfAm women, be they married or single, should use condoms. I don't know how practical that is.

I don't think condoms are enough protection against AIDS for married women to worry about it. Unless you're only with your husband once a month or so, the odds of a condom malfunction are high enough that they pretty much nullify use in frequent intercourse. If your husband has AIDS, and you have intercourse with him on a constant basis, you are probably going to get AIDS regardless of use of a condom.

Until they come up with a 100% effective prevention of STDs, with one night stands, you're still tossing a coin, but I would hope those would be less frequent then a monogamous relationship.

[nikki1920]

I'd like to see the church take on a more proactive stance, but you know how "righteous" some of our churches can be. I STILL get looked at funny when I bring my daughter to some churches.

How about we just get tested more often? I get a test every 6 months, period point blank. We need to stop stigmatizing people who are HIV positive. It's not a punishment from God nor is it a gay disease. I would like for the church to take on safer sex education, but I realize that this is a long shot.

[lovelyivy84]

Agreed with nikki- we all need to stop pretending this isn't out there and take precautions. I honestly don't know how to respond to the question though- how do we make everyone more aware. I feel like I grew up knowing this was out there, as did everyone my generation. It's affected the way I carry myself and conduct my relationships my whole adult life. We have been bombarded with the consequences that risky sexual behavior leads to for decades, but a lot people are just not willing to change, or refrain from this behavior.

[nikki1920]

It's an interesting question though..

[Neosoulchild]

Originally Posted by nikki1920

I would like for the church to take on safer sex education, but I realize that this is a long shot.

If the Church believes that fornication is a sin, homosexuality is a sin, and adultery is a sin, why would they take on safer sex education? Wouldn't that be hypocritical?

[So blessed!]

Neosoulchild, your point is well-taken, but I think HIV/AIDS transmission falls under the same rubric as teenage parenthood, street violence, and drug abuse-- which many churches do preach about.

It's about respect of your body (and, in this case, your partner's body). One of the most disturbing parts of the special was when two Af-Am men in the panel said that they had given HIV/AIDS to their S.O.'s, and they showed NO REMORSE. People who don't respect themselves tend to engage in high-risk behaviors and put their partners at risk.

I'm not sure if regular HIV/AIDS screening for each person is the way to go... once you've got it, you've got it. Screening won't make all infected people tell the truth to their partners or try to protect their partners.

Where else other than the church in the Black community are we equipped to deal with issues of self-respect, honesty, candor, and safe sexual relationships????? Not our news stations-- we don't have one. Oprah can't do it all. To my thinking, our music videos are the only mainstream outlet that we share, but most artists choose promiscuity and no-consequences sex as topics instead of education and respect...

[jubilance1922]

Originally Posted by Neosoulchild

If the Church believes that fornication is a sin, homosexuality is a sin, and adultery is a sin, why would they take on safer sex education? Wouldn't that be hypocritical?

Just my opinion...

You can love someone and try to help them and keep them healthy without condoning their behavior. Its more than likely that folks are going to have sex, and so it is better for the church (who has a significant amount of influence) to remain silent, or to go out and try to educate people so that they continue to be healthy?

Not to mention, part of the education process can be a religious decision on why its important to wait until marriage, not only as part of your duty to yourself and your faith, but also because of XYZ health risks.

[Toujours_Jolie]

Originally Posted by AlphaFrog

I don't think condoms are enough protection against AIDS for married women to worry about it. Unless you're only with your husband once a month or so, the odds of a condom malfunction are high enough that they pretty much nullify use in frequent intercourse. If your husband has AIDS, and you have intercourse with him on a constant basis, you are probably going to get AIDS regardless of use of a condom.

Until they come up with a 100% effective prevention of STDs, with one night stands, you're still tossing a coin, but I would hope those would be less frequent then a monogamous relationship.

I'm a Certified HIV Tester and Prevention Counselor, and I would have to disagree regarding your statement about condoms not being effective enough for individuals engaged in frequent sex with one another. If you use a condom correctly, even if you have sex a lot, the odds of your condom malfunctioning don't increase. Studies have shown that individuals who use condoms while engaging in vaginal intercourse with an infected partner are not very likely to contract the virus. It's much easier to get pregnant or become infected with Hepatitis than it is to contract HIV, which is why using a condom is more effective at staving off HIV than it is for preventing pregnancy or Hepatitis. Of course, no method of protection is 100% fail proof. However, its very dangerous to give people the impression that condom use is ineffective at preventing HIV transmission. If more people used condoms all the time, the rate of transmission would drop drastically.

[nonchalant]

Originally Posted by Toujours_Jolie

I'm a Certified HIV Tester and Prevention Counselor, and I would have to disagree regarding your statement about condoms not being effective enough for individuals engaged in frequent sex with one another. If you use a condom correctly, even if you have sex a lot, the odds of your condom malfunctioning don't increase. Studies have shown that individuals who use condoms while engaging in vaginal intercourse with an infected partner are not very likely to contract the virus. It's much easier to get pregnant or become infected with Hepatitis than it is to contract HIV, which is why using a condom is more effective at staving off HIV than it is for preventing pregnancy or Hepatitis. Of course, no method of protection is 100% fail proof. However, its very dangerous to give people the impression that condom use is ineffective at preventing HIV transmission. If more people used condoms all the time, the rate of transmission would drop drastically.

I was waiting on someone to speak on that because I totally disagreed too. I just didn't want to do any research to locate the facts.

Pertaining to the question at hand, I feel that sex education should be more detailed. I feel that people with HIV/AIDS should speak in these sessions and state their view including how/why they got it, how it effects everyday life, etc. I think people put too much trust in their partners. Testing should be done every six months, and paper work should always be requested for proof of the results. Partners should ask for paperwork and still take into consideration the time frame it takes for the virus to show up in the body. There are many things that can be done. People just get caught up in the moment and are too trusting.

[neosoul]

Originally Posted by Toujours_Jolie

I'm a Certified HIV Tester and Prevention Counselor...

I'm working on that righ' now... church!

[Honeykiss1974]

Soblessed already posted a beginning to the REAL reason why this disease is rampant in our communities and here it is.....

Originally Posted by So blessed!

I'm a medical student and randomly happened to see this the night before I met a Black patient who came for an HIV/AIDS follow-up blood test/counseling. She'd had unprotected sex with her boyfriend, who turned out to be bisexual. She found out he had HIV only by chance (he never told her). This woman is young and is the sole parent of a child. When I asked her why she didn't use condoms with this man (he'd behaved aberrantly for years) she looked at me and said, "I was so tired of being lonely." Basically, she *willed* her relationship to be monogamous, and ignored the glaring signs that her boyfriend was engaging in high-risk behaviors. So she didn't protect herself.

Don't get me wrong. I think education of the disease is important, but that has been going on for years and yet in still our infection rates are climbing. Everyone has heard the medical information, they've heard the Rae Lewis Thortons speak on what it's like to live with the disease, they've seen the Girlfriends episode, but yet and still we are dying at alarming rates and the answer (IMO) isn't as simple as throwing blame at the church or more phamlets at it.

Call me old fashioned, but I really believe that destruction of the black family is the root of MANY problems that disproportionately affect the black community today. I really do. Within the confines of a family, there is so much to learn. The way we deal with the opposite sex begins with the relationships that we have with our father. And if he is absent, there is nothing there to fill that void so we are left to fill it with something or someone else, regardless of the consequences. Take the example above, you have a woman that is willing to overlook behavior that SHE KNOW may be putting her in danger all for the temporary sense of feeling loved. It is feeling (of being wanted, to belong, to feel loved) that causes many otherwise sounded minded people to do crazy things.

If you are a person that work or interact with young women today, you can see this. Way to many young women are willing to do ANYTHING in order to get some young knuckle head boy to like them (or because he said that the loved her). In today's world, having a baby by some boy is the equivalent (during out time) of wearing his letter jacket or class ring. Somehow, someway we need to instill in us (women) a sense of self worth and self love. That our lives are worth so much more than a temporary pleasure or a false sense of security or love.

I don't know. I'm sure there isn't necessarily just ONE answer to this epidemic, but I do know that people are educated about the disease.....so why are we ignoring that information? I think that's where we need to start...with the why.

Be blessed yall!

[Lady of Pearl]

Yes I agree with the previous poster-the lack of stability and father figures in the home, play an important part in both young women and men's lives. However, I believe it goes deeper than that- we are facing a moral crisis in our country. We are inundated with sex in society and this carries over into the behavior that we see in society today. Sex is advertised from soda pop to music videos. Is it any wonder that most young people and some older can't escape the hype? Whatever happened to abstincence and celibacy? Old fashioned values, I know -but somehow it seemed to be working in previous generations and we didn't have the rash of unwanted pregnacies, and stds. So I think another message needs to be conveyed to both young and old alike before its too late-or is it?

[So blessed!]

I agree with Lady of Pearl.

My thinking:
1) anyone with children needs to get BET and MTV off of their cable (even if you don't let them watch it, they're sneaking it in)
2) restrict TV watching in the home
3) kick their kids off the Internet unless they are sitting next to them (all kids say they're doing their homework online, but then when they disappear with some man they met online, you find out what the real deal is)
4) turn off the radio... when parents are in the car with their kids, why do I hear so many playing rap and R&B with lyrics that I assume they wouldn't want their children to repeat?
5) talk about sexual responsibility *AND* consequences from an early age so the first time children hear about it isn't from their classmates or their little boyfriends/girlfriends, it's from their parents.

Fractured families, absent fathers, whirlwinds of stand-in daddies, and poor choices have also not helped our young women learn self-pride and independence, or our young men to learn responsibility and respect of women.

Since society won't do it for us, we need to individually and familially find the strength to make a moral stand so that our children grow up with a strong sense of values. It's not impossible, but maybe I'm too idealistic.