When Shouldn't You 'Re-Rush'?

adpiucf · #1 09-08-2005, 03:20 PM

When should you throw in the proverbial towel and not "re-rush?" How many times is too many times to be a PNM?

Thoughts?

*if this becomes controversial, let's delete. Starting this thread as an honest question.

sugar and spice · #2 09-08-2005, 03:55 PM

When you have rushed twice already at the same school and not gotten a bid.

When you reacted to the first round of rush rejections by becoming depressed or suicidal.

When your GPA is lower than the minimum (a given).

When you are a junior or senior at a very competitive school where upperclassmen are not free.

When you haven't given some serious thought to what went wrong the first time (were you too shy? etc.) and how to correct those things.

. . . this only scrapes the tip of the iceberg.

aephi alum · #3 09-08-2005, 04:03 PM

It depends on the PNM and on the school, and on why the PNM didn't have a successful rush experience before.

Speaking from an NPC perspective here.....

It's usually pretty difficult for a junior or senior PNM to have a successful FR experience, unless juniors and seniors are free or under a separate quota. A PNM would have to be pretty stellar to be favored over freshmen who can devote 4 full years to the chapter.

For sophomores, it's a bit different. A sophomore still has 3 years ahead of her, possibly more. If the sophomore was released across the board when she rushed her freshman year, she should think about why she was cut. (No sorority is going to tell her why she was cut, of course.) Were her grades iffy? If so, has she pulled them up? Did she have a bad reputation? If so, has she worked to improve it? If she is a better candidate now than she was a year ago, she should go for it.

But if a PNM has gone through FR twice unsuccessfully, maybe it just wasn't meant to be, and it's time for her to move on and devote her energies to something else.

OtterXO · #4 09-08-2005, 04:42 PM

If you rushed, pledged a house and then dropped out or were kicked out. No one wants ABC's sloppy seconds. (I tried to think of a nicer way to say that but I couldn't...

.)

SmartBlondeGPhB · #5 09-08-2005, 05:53 PM

Smaller school, very laid back about recruitment..............

When you've gone through both formal AND informal recruitment (all houses do both, informal is for all non-freshmen) more than once and haven't gotten a bid.

Hmmm........maybe it has something to do with your personality and how you act at fraternity houses (RL experience) and that most women don't like you.

flirt5721 · #6 09-08-2005, 06:32 PM

I think that after the second time that you rush is good enough. If all the sororities drop you twice then I don't believe they will have a good chance of getting into a sorority.

nauadpi · #7 09-08-2005, 06:37 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by OtterXO
If you rushed, pledged a house and then dropped out or were kicked out. No one wants ABC's sloppy seconds. (I tried to think of a nicer way to say that but I couldn't... .)

Kicked out would be one thing... But I have seen women join one house, decide they were not happy there and leave before initiation... Then go through recruitment in the fall again and find a better fit in terms of a chapter...

OtterXO · #8 09-08-2005, 06:43 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by nauadpi
Kicked out would be one thing... But I have seen women join one house, decide they were not happy there and leave before initiation... Then go through recruitment in the fall again and find a better fit in terms of a chapter...

I'm sure it happens, but in my experience once you pledge a house you are affiliated with that house. People know you as being part of that organization. I think it's nice to say that you could go through again and not be cut hard first round, but in my experience it's unlikely. Just my opinion!

APhi Sailorgirl · #9 09-08-2005, 07:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by OtterXO
If you rushed, pledged a house and then dropped out or were kicked out. No one wants ABC's sloppy seconds. (I tried to think of a nicer way to say that but I couldn't... .)

I too have seen where a young woman went to a house since she was a legacy, realize this chapter was not for her at all. Re-Recruit the next year and is very happy at her new home.

When you should not go through recruitment again:

When you went through, then wrote a story in the school newspaper talking about how bad recruitment was.

Then go through again, still do not receive a bid and write another story.

Then you also should not try and pledge the colony forming on campus.

Especially at a small school.

Leslie Anne · #10 09-08-2005, 07:46 PM

Maybe it was just my campus, but right off the top of my head I can think of:

a DG pledge that became a Kappa

a Kappa pledge that became an Alpha Phi

an SDT pledge that became a Kappa Delta

a DG pledge that became a Kappa Delta

a Kappa Delta pledge that became a Sigma Kappa

Not one of these girls would have been considered "used goods." They just didn't find the right fit the first time around. Yes, there was talk - people knew about it but it wasn't a huge negative.

Just my experience...

KSUViolet06 · #11 09-08-2005, 07:54 PM

My school has a very relaxed rush, so I'd say if you've done formal rush twice, and haven't gotten a bid, it's time to throw in the towel.

Beryana · #12 09-08-2005, 08:03 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by OtterXO
I'm sure it happens, but in my experience once you pledge a house you are affiliated with that house. People know you as being part of that organization. I think it's nice to say that you could go through again and not be cut hard first round, but in my experience it's unlikely. Just my opinion!

At the school I started out at, first semester freshmen could not pledge but there was fall rush. You could be extended an invitation to be an 'associate' member (basically you can attend their functions but you don't vote, pay dues, etc) for that semester. I actually had become an associate of one sorority and that spring when I went through rush I did not get any other bids because everyone thought that I would only join the sorority where I had been an associate - despite that sorority being moved down to my 2nd choice (in the list in my head) because I had gotten to know girls in my 1st choice better.

But, it really does depend on the school, the groups, etc, as to whether a 2nd time would be okay - I would not probably recommend a third time around!

Sarah

P.S. Just wanted to add that this is NOT AOII that I am talking about because I was initiated into AOII as an alum initiate. These are former local sororities (they have since become chapters of NPC groups).

pinkyphimu · #13 09-08-2005, 08:14 PM

i don't think you should re-rush if.....

...you dropped out of formal recruitment because you got cut from the most popular houses early on in the week and didn't like the ones you had left.

...you don't have the min grades for the groups.

...you are going to go into rush again dead set on one or two houses. or that you aren't willing to keep an open mind and see how the houses have changed since you last went thru recruitment.

honeychile · #14 09-08-2005, 08:26 PM

-When you show up at the Greek Life Office, and the Greek Advisor suggests that you consider other options.

-When you announce to your Greek friends that you're going to rush again, and they respond with, "Oh."

I think it's safe to say that while a woman can depledge or be depledged from one sorority and bid another, but it's not a common occurance.

33girl · #15 09-08-2005, 09:01 PM

When you rushed once and couldn't shut up to your friends, family, roommate and the fry guy at Burger King about how XYZ was the perfect chapter for you.

And then after getting cut by XYZ you tell everyone tthat you've come to your senses and ABC is the one and only thing you want.

In other words, BE DISCREET WHEN YOU RUSH.

LOL at APhi SailorGirl's story.