Sororities and the South?

[James]

Ok every now and again I invade this forum of estrogen dominated conversation and I have noticed an odd trend.

Southern Sorority life seems to be different than the rest of the Nation.

Other parts of the country have huge systems. Other campuses have 150 plus houses. But in the South it seems more of a problem.

In other areas, even in the larger systems it seems inclusion is the rule. In the South it seems Exclusion is the premise.

But it doesn't seem rooted in the sorority system itself which is neutral.

Rather the Sorority system has seemed to become part of some large Southern Social Pageant involving the magazine Southern Living, Some junior circle (women's group?), Church, country clubs, basically your status in society,and some boiok about Why Princess Margarett couldn't be a Kappa Gamma.

The message seems to be: this is what growing up in the South is about. The right school, the right sorority, the right church and Country club, and that it begins before college.

If I am not totally off based socialogically. Would someone please comment? Or maybe they have the historical antecedents?

[CutiePie2000]

Originally posted by James
Some junior circle (women's group?)

Junior League, I think, is what you mean.

Junior Circle is what Alpha Gamma Delta call their "Young Alumnae" chapters (define "young" however you want)....

[Firehouse]

Although, the pitcure you paint (and well) may not be as pervasive today as it was at one time. The book ("Princess Margaret, etc") is a GREAT window into the phychology that you describe. We southerners like it the way it is. But again, there have been changes that are probably for the best in the long run. The sororities chart their own course, very different from that of our fraternities.

[greeklawgirl]

Originally posted by CutiePie2000
Junior Circle is what Alpha Gamma Delta call their "Young Alumnae" chapters (define "young" however you want)....

Off topic--and just to clarify--the Junior Circle is for alumnae who are recent graduates up to the age of around 35. Of course, we welcome sisters of all ages in our activities!

Sorry to hijack, because this is an interesting topic that's worthy of discussion. Can't wait to read what our resident southern rush experts have to say.

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Originally posted by James
In other areas, even in the larger systems it seems inclusion is the rule. In the South it seems Exclusion is the premise.

Well, I will comment on my system, being the largest in the nation :-).

There is DEFINITELY inclusion. No, not every girl gets her first choice, but it is few and far apart that a girl goes bidless. The ones who don't match are almost always snapped up. Tons of chapters COB, and which chapters those are changes from year to year. Juniors rush, and get bids to perfectly strong houses. A small house one year can pull off a great rush and be a large house the following year. There is also a huge amount of diversity, with very few houses having a very set image.

So yeah, I think we are very different from the South, even with 19 chapters of 150+ and quotas around 50.

[carnation]

Well, you can't generalize. The "right" sorority, country club, etc.--all this is important to some people and not to others. As far as sororities go, pledging one of the "best" groups is immensely important to some. And people tend to know the strength of the chapters at each campus so in some circles, so you couldn't get away with pledging a weaker chapter of a strong sorority...those in the know would say, "Sure, she's an ABC but it was only the Auburn chapter." But...I think most of the people it matters to would rather be in a weaker chapter of a strong sorority than in a less prestigious sorority on a big campus. After all, you'll still get to be in a more prestigious alum club later on.

Also, at many schools you just have one chance to make it into those "sororities of choice"...upperclassmen have a poor chance of being chosen. Crummy, but true.

This isn't just Southern though...often I read articles about how parents in the Northeast obsess to get their kids in the right preschool which will lead to the best prep schools which will get them into the chosen Ivies. The articles would have you believe that all northeasterners are like that, which of course they aren't.

[breathesgelatin]

Stolen from my Chi-O friend's IM profile:

QUOTE OF THE YEAR II:
"First there's Chi O, then you get married, then there's Junior League and then you die."
Thanks Christina Kolock for putting my measy life goals in perspective. I now need to change my law school aspirations to a pre-wed major and I need to stop going to the library so that I can learn how to make the perfect grits! After all, I may be a Yankee, but with the right recipes and the right bling, I can surely score a coveted place in the Junior League someday...

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!

At my campus this is definately true. Even though it's an elite school there is a certain group of girls out to get their MRS degree and a lot of them do tend to gravitate to certain sororities. Southern rush is intense, but there are ususally some laid back alternatives, too.

[HotDamnImAPhiMu]

Oh good lord. James, get your panties out of a bunch.

Surprisingly, not all Southern women focus their entire lives around being in the "right" sorority and getting married.

The greek system is different because the *south* is different.

[Lisa Fishman]

James, Do you mean Junior Leauge? That is different than Junior Circle, which is the young alumnae AGD group. I think in this discussion you mean Junior Leauge, which I know is a big part of life here in the south for women. i.e.- Junior Leauge of Birmingham, AL, and other cities in the south. They raise funds to help the community.

[ladybug1116]

No, not all southern women focus on getting married right out of college and being in the "right" sorority, but there are quite a few who do. I grew up in Auburn and still live in Alabama and some of the things you hear and see really would make you shake your head in disbelief. It was honestly culture shock going to Florida State because the lifestyles are so different there (even Greek life).

I really think it all depends on your upbringing and what "priorities" your parents feel are important (in the social system). Some families just live this life focused on society and don't know how to think any differently. In my opinion only those in the "inner circle" of society are interested in the minute details which other people might dismiss as inane. There is ettiquette and good taste and then there is ettiquette ---taken to a whole new level. Of course, I am from the south so maybe even my view is a little skewed

(Sorry if this doesn't make sense, I'm still not totally awake yet )

[justamom]

Carnation-But...I think most of the people it matters to would rather be in a weaker chapter of a strong sorority than in a less prestigious sorority on a big campus. After all, you'll still get to be in a more prestigious alum club later on.
Too true, too true!

Here, you attend one of two schools out of six. Discernibly more emphasis placed on the private school.

You are a member of two particular Krewes.

Of COURSE your mother is in the League! She also is in the inner Pan. Alum circle.

It honestly helps if your parents attended LSU and you are a legacy. If this isn't possible...is you Dad a lawyer??? (Doctors and businessmen are OK if there are other listed qualities.)

Exaggerated to a degree, but the parents are important for many reasons, one being the kids mix together from birth. When your parents share activities, it starts all the way back to play dates at the park. It's like being cousins, you grow up with a certain set of kids and the ones ahead age wise pull for those behind. If you know your local history, you can see social groups reflected in the sororities and SOME of the fraternities. A great guy in one of the fraternities called over Christmas and we ended up talking for close to an hour. He said he was the last of our town's actives and was going inactive this semester. He said well, that's about it for _______. No one left to speak for them. Our town has now shifted to basically 3 fraternities. Our private school girls are shifting as well. The public school girls hit a sorority that hadn't seen many from our area for several years.

Every year I see more and more that just makes me shake my head. HOWEVER, if you think about it, it's only natural for childhood friends to pull for one another. It also explains how some stereo types are perpetuated. There are so many dynamics at in work Southern Rush. I doubt anyone interested in the nuances of recruitment or the South in general would ever get bored.

[IvySpice]

often I read articles about how parents in the Northeast obsess to get their kids in the right preschool which will lead to the best prep schools which will get them into the chosen Ivies.

Carnation, as usual, you bring up a very insightful comparison. From the little I know about the emphasis placed on Southern rush, it has a lot more in common with college admissions in the Northeast than it does with rush in the Northeast. In my parents' circle, for a child to end up at a nationally prestigious state school like Michigan is seen as borderline embarrassing...at a minimum, a child should go to a school like Smith or University of Chicago, and preferably Princeton, MIT, etc. If a child went to an SEC school, with the possible exception of Vanderbilt, that would be seen as something approaching a parenting failure.

On the one hand, the college admissions system doesn't claim that its goal is to foster sisterhood and friendship, and it is inclusive in the sense that anyone from anywhere who earns a spot in a given school is considered equal, even if (maybe especially if) her parents are illiterate immigrants. On the other hand, it's ultimately as complex and snobby as any rush. So Northerners (from my social class, at least) shouldn't be calling any kettles black when it comes to having ideas about moving in the "right" institutions.

I doubt anyone interested in the nuances of recruitment or the South in general would ever get bored.

Justamom, you are right. Count me as one of those. I knew almost nothing about the South before I started reading Greekchat...now I still know almost nothing, but I'm fascinated! I read the Princess Margaret book, Prudence Mackintosh and Florence King's books, and I am still looking for more.

I think it is amazing that this is my own country, and there are whole societies here that I know less about (and in some ways seem more foreign to me) than France or Japan. There is so much that I haven't seen. I'm about to visit a friend (a KAO!) who's working in Birmingham, and I can't wait to see the Deep South for the first time. We're going to the Alabama/Auburn basketball game in Tuscaloosa...roll Tide! (can you say that for basketball? )

Ivy

[DGMarie]

In my experience, rush at U of SC was extremely competitive. We had several large sororities and a few smaller ones. The larger ones I'll call A, B and C. These were the Southern Belle groups. Large, popular, beautiful but not necessarily diverse. But that was okay because from my perspective this is what they wanted.


Rush was not so much finding a home as winning a beauty pageant. Money, clothes, who your parents were and where you were from were big qualifiers. Those without recs need not apply. Not getting in to one of the big three could be crushing. People actually transferred schools if they could not get into one. Suicide bidding was common. So was dirty rush. I was first hand witness to this. I can't tell you how many times my friend (a freshman) who was tall, gorgeous and rushing one of the big three, got personal notes and phone calls and gifts from sisters during rush.

This was all about 13 years ago, but I would think based on conversations here and now that this isn't so uncommon.

[AXOLiz]

Originally posted by IvySpice
I think it is amazing that this is my own country, and there are whole societies here that I know less about (and in some ways seem more foreign to me) than France or Japan. There is so much that I haven't seen. I'm about to visit a friend (a KAO!) who's working in Birmingham, and I can't wait to see the Deep South for the first time. We're going to the Alabama/Auburn basketball game in Tuscaloosa...roll Tide! (can you say that for basketball? )

Totally off topic...I was down in Alabama the weekend of the Alabama/Auburn football game, but totally didn't put two and two together. Had I figured it out sooner, I know I would've been there for all the craziness. Enjoy the game, and make sure to drink all the sweet tea you can while you're down there.

[lifesaver]

Originally posted by AXOLiz

Enjoy the game, and make sure to drink all the sweet tea you can while you're down there.

Am drinking sweet tea as I read this. lol. Gotta love the south.