Non Member Wearing Badge

[Sciencewoman]

How would you handle this situation: this past fall one of our new members told me quietly after a new member meeting that one of her professors was wearing her mother's Gamma Phi Beta badge. The prof. approached the new member in class and they had a polite conversation about her mother and she said that she likes to wear her badge in her memory. We didn't know what to do, because I didn't want to offend a colleague (I don't know her; she's in another dept.) or say anything when the new member was still in her class. I also thought about making a friendly contact. I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt...maybe she didn't know, and if it means that much to her, maybe she'd make a good AI candidate. Then I just forgot about it.

Sooooo...today I was in her building and I happened to stop to look at the big hallway bulletin board featuring teaching award winners and there she is...wearing the badge in her picture! This is a professional, studio portrait! The badge is obviously a historical design. Now I've gone from viewing this a case of well-meaning ignorance to an outright impersonation/masquerade ...I looked her up, and she is not a Gamma Phi.

What would you do?

[SWTXBelle]

Would she be suitable for alumnae initiation?

Seriously - this could be an opportunity. She's winning awards, so obviously distinguished in her field. Thanks to the connection with her mother, she already has a relationship with Gamma Phi. It could be a win-win.

I don't see anyway to wrest the badge away from her without it being very awkward. Take those lemons and make some lemonade, IF she meets membership criteria.

She may well not realize exactly the implication of wearing it - non-greeks often don't.

[Sciencewoman]

I am inclined to agree with you. Also, I now have a valid reason to make contact, without having to say that her student reported it to me...since she is wearing the badge so obviously, it invites a contact. My first thought, before I recognized the name as being the same professor, was, "oh, there's a Gamma Phi!"

I'll let you know how it goes....

[homeward*bound]

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

Would she be suitable for alumnae initiation?

Seriously - this could be an opportunity. She's winning awards, so obviously distinguished in her field. Thanks to the connection with her mother, she already has a relationship with Gamma Phi. It could be a win-win.

I don't see anyway to wrest the badge away from her without it being very awkward. Take those lemons and make some lemonade, IF she meets membership criteria.

She may well not realize exactly the implication of wearing it - non-greeks often don't.

I absolutely agree with this. As Greeks, we understand the meaning behind badges and the significance of wearing them. I don't think the average non-Greek understands any of that.

I lost my mother when I was a very young adult. It's hard to express how much comfort I received from wearing her jewelry, and I can understand how it may make your colleague feel.

She's probably unaware of our alumnae initiation program. Although I obviously don't know her personally, given her tie to our sorority, ties to your school, and professional accomplishments, she sounds like the kind of candidate we might be interested in approaching.

Originally Posted by Sciencewoman

I am inclined to agree with you. Also, I now have a valid reason to make contact, without having to say that her student reported it to me...since she is wearing the badge so obviously, it invites a contact. My first thought, before I recognized the name as being the same professor, was, "oh, there's a Gamma Phi!"

I'll let you know how it goes....

Good luck! I'm eager to learn how things turn out.

[Sciencewoman]

Originally Posted by homeward*bound

I absolutely agree with this. As Greeks, we understand the meaning behind badges and the significance of wearing them. I don't think the average non-Greek understands any of that.

I lost my mother when I was a very young adult. It's hard to express how much comfort I received from wearing her jewelry, and I can understand how it may make your colleague feel.

She's probably unaware of our alumnae initiation program. Although I obviously don't know her personally, given her tie to our sorority, ties to your school, and professional accomplishments, she sounds like the kind of candidate we might be interested in approaching.



Good luck! I'm eager to learn how things turn out.

Before I e-mailed her, I spoke with another sister/faculty member who I thought might know her...she said she was "nice" and although she didn't know her well or know about the badge, she said to use her name when I contacted her.

I heard back from her this morning, and I believe her situation is very similar to yours, homeward*bound. She lost her mother to cancer several years ago and she wears the badge in her memory. I don't think she realizes that wearing the badge is inappropriate.

She suggested meeting for lunch or coffee, so that will be the next step. I think it is looking positive.

I sponsored an AI a couple years ago, so I am familiar with the process, and it is involved.

[naraht]

Originally Posted by Sciencewoman

I sponsored an AI a couple years ago, so I am familiar with the process, and it is involved.

I'd like to compliment on the way that you are handling it. Of all of the possible situations that might fall under "Perp", this is about as good as it can be.

For organizations without AI (like mine), I think my first positive thought would be having the women become an advisor to a chapter at the school, which would also give the right to wear the badge. I don't know if that is another possible solution with G Phi B.

Whether a chapter service project related to the type of cancer than her mother died from would make her feel more comfortable or if it would be viewed as "sucking up" would be something that would have to be decided after meeting with her.

Again, keep us informed of what happens, I'm curious as well.

[SWTXBelle]

Only initiated members may wear our badge.

I know of several alumnae initiates who went on to become chapter advisers.

[momof4girls]

Originally Posted by Sciencewoman

She suggested meeting for lunch or coffee, so that will be the next step. I think it is looking positive.

Have you had that lunch or coffee meeting yet?

[Sciencewoman]

OK...I'll let you all know how it goes (most likely via PM).

[Senusret I]

I am nosy, please let me know, too.

LOL in all seriousness, this has been an eye-opening thread on many levels. I hope it works out for you.

[amIblue?]

I can't blame a non member for wanting to wear the Gamma Phi badge. It's gorgeous.

[shirley1929]

Originally Posted by Senusret I

I am nosy, please let me know, too.

Second this! Understand if you can't though...

Originally Posted by amIblue?

I can't blame a non member for wanting to wear the Gamma Phi badge. It's gorgeous.

And this!

[pbear19]

I hope that it goes well! If she is a good candidate, which she sounds like on paper, I hope she considers it.

[IndianaSigKap]

Sciencewoman my hat is off to you. You handled this situation with grace and class. You have done justice to your organization, for sure. After reading your initial post, I thought how I would have handled it in that moment and I know I would not have done nearly as well as you. AI would have never crossed my mind at all.

[Sciencewoman]

^^^ Aw...the next time a whiny PNM says that GCers are all meanies, she should look at this thread. I think we should all pat ourselves on the back for being so nice!

I just sent the e-mail. Now we wait and see....