Adopting a Snowflake

carnation · #1 10-13-2011, 02:17 PM

(I know what you're thinking and it has nothing to do with that.)

"Snowflakes" is a term for embryos who were conceived by IVF but for whatever reason, their biological parents aren't interested in carrying them to term. Some people allow them to be adopted and carried by other couples. I've seen the websites..you can even choose by physical characteristics, then you get a homestudy and when approved, you arrange for the medical part. Some couples who aren't infertile are adopting snowflakes.

Would you adopt a snowflake?

DeltaBetaBaby · #2 10-13-2011, 03:04 PM

Isn't making the baby supposed to be the fun part???

amIblue? · #3 10-13-2011, 03:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

Isn't making the baby supposed to be the fun part???

I would have to say that all depends on who you're making the baby with!

On a serious note, if fertility is a struggle, the making it part can be less fun because you're so focused on getting pregnant.

I think adopting a snowflake is a very wonderful thing to do, and I might consider it.

DubaiSis · #4 10-13-2011, 03:07 PM

I'm not interested in having children, but if I were, this would be a great situation if I couldn't do it the old fashioned way. But in general I'm all for recycling those embryos in all methods available, including stem cell research and usage. I would hope that parents that have these snowflakes produced think in advance what they're going to do with them, whether it's discard them, donate them to another couple or use them for research. But just putting them in the bank for 100 years seems illogical. And if you've chosen this method of reproduction (IMHO of course) you don't get to call religion. You've already bypassed God by turning to science.

DrPhil · #5 10-13-2011, 03:15 PM

The name makes me cringe.

DubaiSis · #6 10-13-2011, 03:35 PM

Ditto. Even without GC it conjures up very negative images in my head.

DrPhil · #7 10-13-2011, 03:40 PM

I keep thinking "Alien."

Mevara · #8 10-13-2011, 05:49 PM

Why adopt a snowflake when there are so many children out there waiting to be adopted.

carnation · #9 10-13-2011, 06:16 PM

Five of ours are adopted but there are several reasons why many people don't adopt. For starters, a lot of the kids (international and domestic) are badly damaged emotionally--even by very young ages--and lots of people don't have it in them to rescue them. I can not blame them...plus some of these kids would tear your family apart. You can't always know if the social workers are telling you the truth about the kids either; some don't because they want the children placed.

Also, some adopters want infants and in this country, it's costing $25-$40K now. International adoption can be cheaper but the kids are rarely young babies anymore. And that's if you get one; there are many scammers out there who'll fake a pregnancy or create an imaginary child and take your money and run.

State governments will tell you about the thousands of children who are available. I read a paper this week on one state that claimed that-- but once you subtracted all the kids whose relatives were fostering them, those who couldn't be adopted because of extenuating circumstances, yadda yadda, the number of actual available children was 313. And who knows what condition those children were in?

We have not regretted adoption for one second and I would do it again in a blink. However, we have also been through adoption hell with lying agencies, scammers, people who jacked up prices, etc. I can see exactly why potential adopters would choose adopting a snowflake over adoption.

Drolefille · #10 10-14-2011, 01:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carnation

And who knows what condition those children were in?

...

DeltaBetaBaby · #11 10-14-2011, 08:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Drolefille

...

Really? You're going to attack the adoptive mother of FIVE children for pointing out that not every set of potential parents is ready/able to adopt an emotionally troubled child?

agzg · #12 10-14-2011, 09:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

Really? You're going to attack the adoptive mother of FIVE children for pointing out that not every set of potential parents is ready/able to adopt an emotionally troubled child?

I think it was more that the phrasing makes them sound like they were used cars rather than children.

33girl · #13 10-13-2011, 06:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carnation

(I know what you're thinking and it has nothing to do with that.)

"Snowflakes" is a term for embryos who were conceived by IVF but for whatever reason, their biological parents aren't interested in carrying them to term. Some people allow them to be adopted and carried by other couples. I've seen the websites..you can even choose by physical characteristics, then you get a homestudy and when approved, you arrange for the medical part. Some couples who aren't infertile are adopting snowflakes.

Would you adopt a snowflake?

Oh, I get it - so they do IVF and instead of only one egg fertilizing, they get half a dozen?

Yes, this is a lovely idea (although I agree w/ the Doc about the name being icky) because apparently the original parents are too big of dumbasses to think about what the friggin' consequences might be.

If that's not the deal, let me know, but shit, the parents should know that when they go into it.

Xylochick216 · #14 10-13-2011, 07:00 PM

From what I know, couples using IVF get many eggs during the egg retrieval and try to fertilize as many as possible to increase their chances that at least 2 will fertilize. The best two (or one or three) are then used in IVF. Couples must sign forms prior to starting the process to decide what to do with the leftover embryos. Couples can store them to use in the future (sparing the entire IVF process next time), donate them, or destroy them.

christiangirl · #15 10-13-2011, 07:34 PM

On the one hand, it would give the adoptive parents the experience of getting to be pregnant which I know a lot of them must really wish they could have. But something about it (including the name) gives me a creepy feeling. It's such a beautiful and awesome thing if I look at it one way, but I can't shake the feeling (and I've been trying for several minutes to focus on the positive). I don't think I would do this--I would rather just adopt a child.