Should I rush again?

gmIII · #1 05-05-2010, 02:36 AM

Life was good, came to school joined the fraternity all my friends were in but then the road curved and I crashed. I knew every single member of Phi Kappa Tau and had for years so why did I get cut? I still don't have an answer why 3 weeks before initiation! This has only been a few weeks now and everyone wants to know why I think it is a big deal? Another friend was cut and he still hangs out with them. I really am having a hard time keeping them as my best friends when they just randomly decided to get rid of people. I don't need the fraternity to be their friend but it was something I wanted to do and being cut is like I messed up somehow! I could re rush one of the fraternities I turned down, other friends have said if we like you we don't care about your past but still I feel awkward about it. It would be like a rebound. I have reasons to believe since I know I didn't break any rules it was to punish bigs who aren't being very active. I can share more details about why one active said a board member was on a power trip and getting revenge on other members but I won't disclose any major information. Just for everyone who reads this know honestly, I did nothing wrong and had full filled all my requirements! I see a very small chance in joining another because there are parts of them I don't like or people but at the same time I am really close to some.

Fire away guys.

Psi U MC Vito · #2 05-05-2010, 02:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gmIII

Life was good, came to school joined the fraternity all my friends were in but then the road curved and I crashed. I knew every single member of Phi Kappa Tau and had for years so why did I get cut? I still don't have an answer why 3 weeks before initiation! This has only been a few weeks now and everyone wants to know why I think it is a big deal? Another friend was cut and he still hangs out with them. I really am having a hard time keeping them as my best friends when they just randomly decided to get rid of people. I don't need the fraternity to be their friend but it was something I wanted to do and being cut is like I messed up somehow! I could re rush one of the fraternities I turned down, other friends have said if we like you we don't care about your past but still I feel awkward about it. It would be like a rebound. I have reasons to believe since I know I didn't break any rules it was to punish bigs who aren't being very active. I can share more details about why one active said a board member was on a power trip and getting revenge on other members but I won't disclose any major information. Just for everyone who reads this know honestly, I did nothing wrong and had full filled all my requirements! I see a very small chance in joining another because there are parts of them I don't like or people but at the same time I am really close to some.

Fire away guys.

Is there a question here?

gmIII · #3 05-05-2010, 02:46 AM

Not one I wanted a jerk to answer. If you are just gonna bash and hate then go away.

Psi U MC Vito · #4 05-05-2010, 10:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gmIII

Not one I wanted a jerk to answer. If you are just gonna bash and hate then go away.

First off, if I want to bash and hate, I'm going to do so no matter what you say. BUT, I was actually being serious. I didn't see a question to be answered there. Just a rant about being dropped and you bad mouthing the brothers of the E-board.

dreamseeker · #5 05-05-2010, 03:34 AM

aww vito, don't be a dream crusher.

Ggirl617 · #6 05-05-2010, 03:51 AM

Hey...it's sorta hard to say whether you'll have a chance or not, because we're not the ones deciding. Does that make sense? Also, big parts of whether you'll have a chance depends on a ton of different factors (your school, your friends, etc) all things that we don't really know anything about, so how could we give you an accurate answer, you know?

AOEforme · #7 05-05-2010, 11:15 AM

Maybe it's because full filling all your requirements isn't enough: you have to be someone they can invision in their letters.

We can all spot a jerkus eighty miles a way.

And, BTW, from experience I can tell you that coming on GC as a dismissed new member doesn't really work well. You rarely get sympathy, and people often find out who you are. Especially since you were kind enough to name the GLO.

I'd try and learn from this and move on.

Elephant Walk · #8 05-05-2010, 12:46 PM

Wait, so you were a pledge and then you got cut?

What'd you do?

gmIII · #9 05-05-2010, 03:17 PM

I don't think you will find out who I am unless you happen to go to my school but then you still wouldn't know who I was since several people were cut. Nobody is bad mouthing anyone when this is coming from several guys who are members. I have known these guys forever and so sorry if I have a bad taste in my mouth when my best friends threw me under the bus. I don't need sympathy when I didn't do anything to be cut. The point from several of them is why does it even matter, I can still live in the apartment with them and be their friend. I didn't join to be close to a group of guys when I already am, I joined to be part of the PKE.

*If they didn't want me as a brother they would have gotten rid of me a few days in not 3 weeks before initiation after 6 weeks of pledging.
* My big never goes to meetings so the theory suggested was to punish him by not letting him have a family left when he graduates in 12 days now. This still isn't fair to me!

Barbie's_Rush · #10 05-05-2010, 07:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gmIII

I don't think you will find out who I am unless you happen to go to my school but then you still wouldn't know who I was since several people were cut. Nobody is bad mouthing anyone when this is coming from several guys who are members. I have known these guys forever and so sorry if I have a bad taste in my mouth when my best friends threw me under the bus. I don't need sympathy when I didn't do anything to be cut. The point from several of them is why does it even matter, I can still live in the apartment with them and be their friend. I didn't join to be close to a group of guys when I already am, I joined to be part of the PKE.

*If they didn't want me as a brother they would have gotten rid of me a few days in not 3 weeks before initiation after 6 weeks of pledging.
* My big never goes to meetings so the theory suggested was to punish him by not letting him have a family left when he graduates in 12 days now. This still isn't fair to me!

I think you should be talking to the "best friends" who blackballed you instead of random strangers on the intarwebz.

gmIII · #11 05-05-2010, 07:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Barbie's_Rush

I think you should be talking to the "best friends" who blackballed you instead of random strangers on the intarwebz.

I have nobody seems to get the big deal, the other people cut still hang out with them. I just find it a big deal because it wasn't about staying friends with them it was about the organization.

Blue Skies · #12 05-09-2010, 04:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gmIII

I don't think you will find out who I am unless you happen to go to my school but then you still wouldn't know who I was since several people were cut. Nobody is bad mouthing anyone when this is coming from several guys who are members. I have known these guys forever and so sorry if I have a bad taste in my mouth when my best friends threw me under the bus. I don't need sympathy when I didn't do anything to be cut. The point from several of them is why does it even matter, I can still live in the apartment with them and be their friend. I didn't join to be close to a group of guys when I already am, I joined to be part of the PKE.

*If they didn't want me as a brother they would have gotten rid of me a few days in not 3 weeks before initiation after 6 weeks of pledging.
* My big never goes to meetings so the theory suggested was to punish him by not letting him have a family left when he graduates in 12 days now. This still isn't fair to me!

In all likelihood, you will never know why you were dropped. Your experience is unfortunate, but not all that unusual. Fraternity pledges can and do get dropped at any point of the pledging process.

I tend to accept people at face value, so I wouldn't hold it against your friends. If I were in your position, I would choose to believe (barring other evidence) that my friends fought vigorously for me among their brothers, but were, for some reason, overruled.

If you want to rush another chapter, or chapters, I would go ahead and try it. Ask for your friends' opinions about whether this is likely to be successful on your particular campus. I might even ask them for recommendations about what chapter might be a good fit, and why, along with anything that you can do to add some polish to your overall presentation. Asking these types of questions might give you some interesting insights.

Keep in mind that fraternity men often have very good friends, even best friends, in other chapters.

Also keep in mind that you can have a wonderful college experience whether or not you are in a social fraternity. My opinion is, if your dream chapter turns you down, then become the BMOC that they WISH they could call their own.

ETA: Every life has its share of disappointments. If this is your first major disappointment, then you've had a pretty good start. Please trust me when I say that even the guys around you who seem to be living charmed lives will get their fair share (divorce, job loss, business reversals, health issues, or what have you.) People gain respect from others when they handle disappointments with grace and dignity. Hold your head up, believe in yourself, and move on.

Senusret I · #13 05-05-2010, 03:27 PM

knight_shadow · #14 05-05-2010, 04:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gmIII

I don't think you will find out who I am unless you happen to go to my school but then you still wouldn't know who I was since several people were cut. Nobody is bad mouthing anyone when this is coming from several guys who are members. I have known these guys forever and so sorry if I have a bad taste in my mouth when my best friends threw me under the bus. I don't need sympathy when I didn't do anything to be cut. The point from several of them is why does it even matter, I can still live in the apartment with them and be their friend. I didn't join to be close to a group of guys when I already am, I joined to be part of the PKE.

*If they didn't want me as a brother they would have gotten rid of me a few days in not 3 weeks before initiation after 6 weeks of pledging.
* My big never goes to meetings so the theory suggested was to punish him by not letting him have a family left when he graduates in 12 days now. This still isn't fair to me!

Dude...you still haven't posed a question.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Senusret I

I'm really thru with you. For life. Srsly.

gmIII · #15 05-05-2010, 07:05 PM

Must any of you post if you aren't going to help. I asked a question and I am sure there are people that can give advise on to go elsewhere or just to stay not Greek. Seeing as I didn't break rules or do things that embarassed or caused discipline action to the Fraternity I have been given a raw deal. It shouldn't just be life sucks sometimes and move on.