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Welcome to our newest member, Anna Weaver |
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03-27-2004, 12:57 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Sep 1999
Location: NY
Posts: 8,594
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Why are girls so time intensive?
One of the top complaints I hear form other guys is how much time you gals require.
Men like to do things. So we will like to do things with you.
Girls seem to like company for company's sake . . . they will just want to spend time together doing something or doing nothing.
Imaginary conversation:
Girl: So what are you doing this Saturday.
Boy: Nothing.
Girls hears: OH He has no plans so he can just come over early and spend the whole day with me and if we want to do errands or whatever we can.
Boy really means: I have nothing specifcally planned to "do" yet, but there are probably various erands I need to run
Problem: Boy won't run his own errands if he spends the entire day with girl . . . running her errands . . and just being together.
Boy also doesn't want to really run his errands with girl. That makes them take 4 times as long and harder to do.
Boys need cave time. We need alone time to recharge. Having no current plans doesn't mean we are available for "Best Friend Hang-Out Time".
We really aren't your Best girl Friend no matter how much you treat us that way by incessant prattle and time domination.
I know 90 percent of you girls out there are going, I don't take up a lot my BF's time . . . well trust me you do (to the boy). Very few girls don't do that. I agree there are a handfulof exceptions, but chances are you are not one of them.
So if you want a more successful relationship . . .
For the Love of God. . .
Stop asking us to just hang out. Make sure we are doing something. Something preferably task oriented. And when the tasks are over, and we have had sex, encourage us to go to seperate places.
It will make us like you so much more.
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03-27-2004, 01:05 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: freakin' out
Posts: 1,728
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hahahahaha.... ok first of all- this post i find hysterical... i can't wait to see what the other girlies have to say about this...
second of all... i think you are right !! yes- i said it- i think your right about this- hanging out is fun from time to time- but you know- like watching tv- having some guy tagging along with me while i peruse the drugstore isles looking at the best kind of lip gloss or having him hold my purse while i try something on is not fun for me- or him- i know its painful for him.... i see this when the guys are hundled around the chairs in wet seal or soemthing- they don't know waht to do with themselves while their girlfriends try some shirt on- asking "does this make me look fat??" poor guy doesn't know how to answer that one... i feel badly for them- why would i put a guy i'm dating through similar torture?
i think i would have a very successful relationship is someone worthwhile would give me the chance
p.s. thanks for the advice
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you don't need electricity to cut pineapple.
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03-27-2004, 01:18 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Brooklyn
Posts: 1,609
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It goes the other way as well. The last two guys I dated ALWAYS wanted to be together. Let's go grocery shopping. Let's go do laundry. Want me to come to work on your break? Guess what boo, I got a job where you work at! Can I go with you to MI to visit your mom/dad? Can you give me a ride home after work tand then come get me in a while so we can hang?
MOFO, NO!!!!! When do I get 'me' time!?
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03-27-2004, 03:05 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: WWJMD?
Posts: 7,560
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LOL, I can't even imagine wanting a guy to come with me while I run errands.
If I'm dating a guy and he wants to go home after sex, he should find another woman. That's just not cool. It's fine for a one night stand, but if we're in a relationship, he should stay over and make me coffee in the morning.
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A hiney bird is a bird that flies in perfectly executed, concentric circles until it eventually flies up its own behind and poof! disappears forever....
-Ken Harrelson
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03-27-2004, 03:43 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Lexington, KY
Posts: 1,293
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I'm nothing like what James reported!!!! I'm the opposite.
My ex used to call and say what are you doing Saturday.....I'd say not a lot....and he'd assume he'd come over about 3pm and we'd hang out all day!!!!
My not a lot....is considered This is a Jen day. Which might be me going to the mall for a couple hours, studying, watching some NCAA hoops, or just drinking coffee on my porch.
I DO NOT require lots of time from a bf. I require maybe one weekend night, a lunch during the week possibly, and a evening stopin/dinner/or whatever during the week. This is 3 events that can be as short as 1 hour.
Trust me, I know you boys have your "boys stuff" to do. And I have my "girls stuff" to do.
So to answer your question...... I do not know why some girls are like this. But I am not!
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03-27-2004, 04:07 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: NooYawk
Posts: 5,478
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Quote:
Originally posted by DigitalAngel126
It goes the other way as well. The last two guys I dated ALWAYS wanted to be together. Let's go grocery shopping. Let's go do laundry. Want me to come to work on your break? Guess what boo, I got a job where you work at! Can I go with you to MI to visit your mom/dad? Can you give me a ride home after work tand then come get me in a while so we can hang?
MOFO, NO!!!!! When do I get 'me' time!?
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I feel ya! I hate to be smothered. Usually, I'll make plans to do something, even just to hang out. Though I don't mind spur of the moment ideas, I'd like a little notice as well as time alone!
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ONE LOVE, For All My Life
Talented, tested, tenacious, and true...
A woman of diversity through and through.
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03-28-2004, 01:28 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Michigan
Posts: 15,599
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Ditto. I think there are members of both genders who do this to people and it's annoying as anything. Just because my ex takes the kids to church for two hours on "my" Sunday, doesn't mean I want to see YOU during those two hours. I want to take a bubble bath, read a book, catch up on housework, without kid interruptions, NOT entertain. And, if I have a cold and don't feel like doing anything, I also don't want you at my house where I feel I have to entertain you, even if you offer to make me chicken soup. I am well enough to make it myself but prefer to be alone in my misery when I'm sick!
It's just the clingy dependent types who do this to people. It's so annoying to the independent types though. The last one wanted to go out on Friday AND Saturday night! One of those HAS to be my "lay around in my jammies reading or watching chick flicks" time. I'm busy, I need a little down time sometimes. If I wanted to be with someone 24/7, I'd have stayed married!
Dee
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03-28-2004, 12:29 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Milwaukee, WI
Posts: 343
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I think James has a valid point in that women (more than men) tend to enjoy just being with someone not really doing anything in particular. I know that sometimes I'm that way. My idea of a nice evening could mean just sitting in my lounge reading while someone else is also in there doing homework or whatnot. You don't need to talk, but it's not awkward.
Anywhoo, I'm rambling.
Point of this is, there's a reason why I tend to have long distance relationships - if you only see your SO once a week, you don't have idle time. You make sure you make the most of your time together. Because I hate being smothered by relationships.
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03-28-2004, 07:50 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Lexington, KY, USA
Posts: 3,185
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I seem to have the opposite problem. Must be Kentucky guys.
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