Just Because We're The Bottom Tier..

ohmydeltaphi · #1 07-20-2016, 11:55 AM

I attend pretty much every Greek event possible from philanthropy dinners to fundraisers to vigils to parties. I do this not to be a kiss-ass, but because I love my chapter enough to sacrifice a little sleep and Netflix. Just because we are the bottom tier, that doesn't mean we have to act like our stereotype. There are only a handful of sisters that help raise the standard of excellence in our chapter, and it shows.

I have severe social anxiety but I can still put on a good face and talk to others in a normal and effective manner. We attract lazy and unmotivated girls during recruitment because of our appearance. Sisters are scaring off our wanted PNMs by being too interviewish or not interested enough in their lives. They rely too much on back pocket questions and we've suffered from consistent disaffiliation. We are no better than any other human, but the goal is not for us to convince PNMs that we are worth their time. PNMs should see that themselves. We at least need to look like we're selective- not desperate to meet a quota. Then once they accept their bid, give PNMs what they thought they'd receive and more!

People like options even if they don't take advantage of all of them. Variety is key. Stop selecting girls that are spitting images of our stereotype. We don't have to be the chapter that feels sorry for people who were going to be bidless in recruitment. There's a reason why they were bidless. The effort that we put in shows. If we are dressed extremely relaxed all of recruitment week because "heels are uncomfortable", then put in some Mr. Scholl's and suck it up! You don't like wearing makeup? Put on some mascara and lipstick at the least! The point isn't heels or makeup, but bids should be earned by showing you have what it takes and are willing to sacrifice a little to be in your chapter. It helps weed out the weak (in this case the unmotivated/undedicated) and more respect for your chapter because you worked to get in there.

Like I said earlier, my chapter isn't very social, so Greeks look at me dumbfounded when I show up to their door and say what sorority I'm in. My sorority doesn't go out or talk to other Greeks. My sorority isn't supposed to have attractive or fit girls. My sorority is supposed to be bottomdwelling and not even considered competition in recruitment. I say screw that! Even if it's just me and my future little, we are going to keep awesome grades, hopefully take up exec positions, and enjoy the rest of college with wellrounded women- whether our chapter joins the bandwagon or not. The bottom tier doesn't have to mean a lesser experience!

*It's not for every school, but my definition of bottom tier is the commonly accepted definition*

FSUZeta · #2 07-20-2016, 12:29 PM

I am sorry that your chapter struggles during recruitment. It sounds like you are ready to be the spark that changes the direction of the chapter. Have you thought of reading this during a chapter meeting?

I agree that if your sisters want to be competitive during recruitment they need to present themselves comparably to the appearance of the other chapters. Sometimes another friendly chapter is willing to practice recruitment techniques with another chapter. That might be helpful.

Attending campus events and supporting other organizations is great PR. It is important that chapter members are identified as such. The goal is to create a positive buzz about the chapter:" I just love those ABC girls. They always support our fundraisers." Another important component is for chapter members to belong to at least one other campus org. It not only looks good on resumes', but is a way for more people to learn how great your members are.

AnchorAlumna · #3 07-20-2016, 02:22 PM

You have put your finger on the cause of a downrated chapter - nobody knows you.
Opinions change when people know you - and you're doing the right things, but you can't do it alone.
Sounds like your chapter needs some serious, heavy-duty guidance and training. I'll bet your adviser, regional officer or even a national officer could arrange for some chapter visitors who could provide that.
Perhaps you could ask to speak to your executive board and discuss ways to bring in help to better train your members to recruit...AND to build good public relations on campus.
I know it's hard when you have just a few members to attend all those events, while XYZ chapter has dozens.
Help is out there, but you have to ask for it.

33girl · #4 07-21-2016, 10:33 PM

Is it the members of the sorority who really want to be as unselective as you say, or are you under HQ pressure to meet quota and total?

You don't mention COB or open bidding. You need to look outside the box at upperclassmen and women who didn't like formal rush - women who don't just want to be in A sorority, they want to be in YOUR sorority. Women who have a year or two of college under their belt typically will have more confidence and be more able to laugh at people who stereotype them, as opposed to first semester freshmen who are desperate to fit in and terrified of making social mistakes.

As far as rush it sounds as though your sisters have had the fear of God put into them about "taboo" topics and so are sounding stilted. They need to know that if a PNM mentions going to the RNC they don't have to think "politics! Oh holy crap no! BAD SUBJECT MUST NOT DISCUSS!!" and veer awkwardly to a discussion of colors or mascots. Practice spinning topics like that - when brought up by the PNM - into more neutral territory without making the PNM feel awkward.

ohmydeltaphi · #5 07-22-2016, 07:46 PM

Thank you for all of your suggestions! I'm a younger member, so my views get dismissed for not having spent enough time in the chapter. Also, my views on not necessarily giving bids to the potentially bidless wouldn't be taken lightly since most of our members were only invited back to our house. I'd come off as rude and out of line (when it's actually just frustration), unlike someone else who might sugar coat the truth and is older. The fact of the matter is sugarcoating our problems hasn't gotten us anywhere. We have too many girls who are just happy to belong to a chapter. To get results from the recruitment practices we've had would be to change our sisters as individuals. They do some activities, but not much that involves other Greek events on campus. Theyll only recruit likeminded people instead of those who have varying personalities but the same core values.

ohmydeltaphi · #6 07-22-2016, 08:20 PM

We are NPC and have a chapter advisor. Our current president is the advisors G-Little and is doing a good job getting the gears turning toward an improved chapter; however, It's not happening as effectively as it should because they are afraid to hurt members' feelings in the process.

It's like the fight parents have with teens for sleeping all day and not being productive with their time. the teen says "be grateful I'm not doing drugs or stealing or drinking-isnt that good enough"

I don't want to settle for good enough

33girl · #7 07-23-2016, 01:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ohmydeltaphi

We are NPC and have a chapter advisor. Our current president is the advisors G-Little

This might be a HUGE problem. That's really, really young for a main chapter advisor. Are your older alumnae (as in, 30 years old or older) involved with the chapter at all? Has the chapter always been this way or is it a recent (as in, the last 5-10 years) development? Figuring this out goes a long way. If your chapter since the dawn of time has been the smaller and "not for very social girls" chapter and your HQ has never gotten on their case, then I would say that you probably joined the wrong chapter.

ohmydeltaphi · #8 08-12-2016, 06:32 AM

Thank you for your help, everyone! I've been doing it all year but I'm trying to motivate my other sisters to be confident in our chapter. Who will respect us if we don't even respect ourselves? I'm like a cheerleader lol. I chose to be here while many got cut during recruitment, so I think there's a bit of underlying pain in showing pride. I'm also going to run for a position and hopefully do some more networking for us. We just need more confident girls in my opinion.

FSUZeta · #9 07-22-2016, 07:54 PM

Are you a NPC sorority? Do you have hands on chapter advisors?

Xidelt · #10 07-22-2016, 10:16 PM

I would really encourage you to run for VPR next time your chapter has elections. You attitude would be a great asset to the recruitment team.

FSUZeta · #11 07-23-2016, 07:18 AM

Do you have just one advisor or an advisory board?

Tom Earp · #12 07-24-2016, 01:50 PM

One main point if you do not believe in yourselves, no one else with either.

While I am a guy, I started a Local Fraternity, it amounts to the same thing. We were looked down on by all Greeks, but, we never gave up. We went out and rushed on our own as got 0 in formal rush. We were a bunch of mis-fits who never gave up!!!

Today, we have the largest and newest House on campus. While a little difference, it boils down to the same thing.

You need to instill a little ego in yourselves and just dig in and go for it!

You did not mention the size of campus or if a bigger Sorority.

If all else fails, contact your National and request help!!!!

All the best of luck.

BTW, you can PM me and maybe we can chat.

SweetTeaParty · #13 07-26-2016, 12:58 PM

OhMy:

My recruitment thread deals with the struggles you've experienced.

http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...d.php?t=152339

Maybe you can get some ideas - - but, let me warn you:

If you really do change your campus image, there WILL be push-back. Not only from your sisters, but from the entire Greek community. You see, they're happy with your tier-placement.

If you're GLO changes their tier, ALL the other groups will HAVE to change and accomodate this - - not pleasant for them.

While my story is (purposefully) lighthearted, there were PLENTY of tears and arguments in our house PLUS some ladies in the other GLO's were HORRIFIED that we were on the way to changing our image.

Be absolutely sure you have your Sisterhood Committee and your National on your side - and buckle-up, it's gonna be a bumpy ride.

Tom Earp · #14 07-27-2016, 02:41 PM

True, but if one wants to change for the better, it must be in for the long haul so that you can gain respect from the other Greeks.

Only you Sisters can make the change or stay mired in the wallow of nothingness!

So, make up your minds, you all are the only ones who can make changes.

kitekat · #15 08-07-2016, 11:00 PM

Be the change you want to see in your chapter

I'm willing to bet that you have more influence over your sisters than you realize right now.

I know this is a frustrating experience, but if you keep leading by example more and more girls in your chapter will follow suit. It may just take a little time for them to come around.