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Threads: 115,593
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| Welcome to our newest member, MysteryMuse |
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02-07-2006, 07:28 PM
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Super Moderator
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Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: On the beach. Well....not really but near it. :0)
Posts: 13,560
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Things You'd Love To Say At Work
1. I see your point, but I still think you're full of shit.
2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to
pronounce.
3. How about never? Is never good for you?
4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in
public.
5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my
way.
6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...
8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.
10. Ahhh...I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again...
11. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
13. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.
14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
15. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
16. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point
of view.
17. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
18. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
19. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!
20. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
21. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.
23. And your crybaby whiny-butt opinion would be...?
24. Do I look like a people person?
25. This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.
26. I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.
27. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
28. If I throw a stick, will you leave?
29. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
30. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
31. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
32. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
33. Can I trade this job for what's behind door #1?
34. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
35. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
36. Chaos, panic, & disorder-my work here is done.
37. How do I set a laser printer to stun?
__________________
Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority, Inc. ** Greater Service, Greater Progress Since 1922
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02-08-2006, 01:27 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jun 2000
Posts: 1,534
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Re: Things You'd Love To Say At Work
Thank you Soror cause you must be reading my mind. I'm a silent person but inward I'm thinking especially #6.
Quote:
Originally posted by NinjaPoodle
1. I see your point, but I still think you're full of shit.
5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my
way.
6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
11. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
20. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
Just the everyday statement to come out of my mouth:
24. Do I look like a people person?
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__________________
Greater Service, Greater Progress since 1922
I don't want nobody to give me nothin. Open up a door, I'll get it myself!! (The late, great James Brown)
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02-08-2006, 01:54 AM
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Super Moderator
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Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Counting my blessings!
Posts: 30,893
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Pardon me for crashing, but I think I need to print that out for my office!! And include, " 38. One more bit out of that apple, and I'm whipping out the Luger!"
__________________
~ *~"ADPi"~*~
♥Proud to be a Macon Magnolia ♥
"He who is not busy being born is busy dying." Bob Dylan
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02-08-2006, 10:56 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: the sleeper cab of my tractor trailer all over the 48
Posts: 2,723
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39. Do you see concern on my face? If you do, let me know so I can change it.
40. You are a figment of my imagination.
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02-08-2006, 11:09 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: From Harlem to Baltimore
Posts: 194
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41. Do you kiss a@@ on the weekend or just during the weekday?
42. Your pot-luck string bean casserole tastes nasty.
43. Do the supervisor have prostate cancer, cause you are really far up his a@@?
__________________
Iota Phi Theta Fraternity, Inc. "OW~OW!!"
F&AM-PHA-MD "2B1~ASK1"
"I travel Li/G\ht and always follow the Polaris Star."
www.myspace.com/masdesigns06
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02-08-2006, 11:14 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Apr 2002
Posts: 261
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good one!
43. Did you just leave the club and come to work dressed like that?
(every office has a hoochie)
44. Although you aren't speaking english, I STILL know you are talking about me; quit being a punk.
45. you should have never got a promotion.
__________________
"Men often become what they believe themselves to be. If I believe I cannot do something, it makes me incapable of doing it. But when I believe I can, then I acquire the ability to do it even if I didn't have it in the beginning."-Gandhi
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02-09-2006, 04:17 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: UP TOP CIRCLE! BABY!!!!
Posts: 175
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I could use over 1/2 of those today! People are just on my nerves lately!
I need a breather!
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02-10-2006, 10:37 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: The Matrix
Posts: 4,424
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This applies to my co-worker right now:
14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
Shut. Up. Already!
__________________
Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc.
It's a jungle out there.
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02-10-2006, 11:01 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: The Ozdust Ballroom
Posts: 14,819
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46. I'll do my work, and you do yours. I have a mom that lives 3 miles from my house, I don't need one at work too. 
__________________
Facile remedium est ubertati; sterilia nullo labore vincuntur.
I think pearls are lovely, especially when you need something to clutch. ~ AzTheta
The Real World Can't Hear You ~ GC Troll
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02-10-2006, 04:08 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: the sleeper cab of my tractor trailer all over the 48
Posts: 2,723
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47. You must be related to Charlie Brown's teacher. When you talk, I only hear, "WONK...wonkwonkwonkwonk."
48. Can I have the abridged version of what you call an explanation?
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02-10-2006, 04:50 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: 614
Posts: 619
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For those who have co workers who have no morals at all...
Who the hell keeps stealin my pens?!!
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02-10-2006, 04:54 PM
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Super Moderator
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Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: On the beach. Well....not really but near it. :0)
Posts: 13,560
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Re: Things You'd Love To Say At Work
While I do find them them all very funny, my personal fave is:
24. Do I look like a people person?
__________________
Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority, Inc. ** Greater Service, Greater Progress Since 1922
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02-10-2006, 05:18 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Atlanta y'all!
Posts: 5,894
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Things I'd LOVE to say at work...
.... is a simple STFU! 
unabbreviated, of course! 
__________________
"I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is to try to please everyone."
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02-14-2006, 12:36 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: San Francisco
Posts: 274
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Sorry to crash, but I really needed that list after a crazy Monday like TODAY! Thanks Ninja Poodle!
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02-14-2006, 10:17 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: UP TOP CIRCLE! BABY!!!!
Posts: 175
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I showed these to a co-worker and she laughed her head off!
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