Looking for some perspective about recruitment...

[CallaLilly13]

So I've been breezing through this site on and off for the past couple of months trying to decide whether or not to go through recruitment. Learning from some of the posts I've read, I've chosen not to disclose my location or school. I will say that I am somewhere in the western half of the US, I'm a junior transfer, and the time for me to make the decision to rush or not is fast approaching. I'm genuinely torn about it. On the one hand I almost feel that I'm too old to do it and wouldn't have much in common with the 17 and 18 year olds that I'd being going through it with. But on the other hand I want to make the best of my time on campus by being really involved and meet a lot of new people. Being apart of greek life seems to be a good way to do this. A close friend of mine was in a sorority as an undergrad and has been encouraging me to at least try it. But my boyfriend who was in a fraternity as an undergrad doesn't think it's a good idea. I literally have a few days to decide and as of right now don't know what I'm going to do. Does anyone have any advice or suggestions for me? Some perspective from outside my circle could be helpful. Thanks everyone!

[SoCalGirl]

Going through rush/recruitment does not commit you to a sorority for life. That's what initiation is for. I think you should give it a shot. At worst you have some hurt feelings. At best you gain life long sisterhood.

You're on a message board where the majority of active users belong to Greek organizations. I highly doubt you'll find someone here who will tell you not to do it.

But as SoCalGirl said, you have no obligation to join just by going through recruitment. If you're extended an invitation to join, you'll go through a new member period before you're initiated.

[Fleur de Lis]

I went through as a junior transfer from another school in the system, and it was one of the best decisions I made in college. You get an instant social calendar and meet tons of people through recruitment and in the sorority. It really wasn't an issue being with 18 year-olds - I was able to make friends in every pledge class because I was a little older. I'm curious why your boyfriend doesn't think it's a good idea because there are lots of date parties and ways for him to be involved in it with you. Let us know if you decide to go through! Good luck!

[CallaLilly13]

Thanks for the replies. I think my hesitation comes more from being nervous about my junior status affecting my recruitment. To complicate matters, I'm already involved with the school through another group and know a few of the girls in the sororities pretty well through this venue. So I'm worried that it's going to be awkward during and after. I guess my biggest fears are stemming from getting cut and feeling weird around them; especially since I've become friends with a couple of them. I haven't even mentioned to them that I'm considering going through recruitment. I’m not sure why my boyfriend doesn’t want me to do it. He’s older and has been out of undergrad for awhile. He thinks that I won’t have time and that I'm not in the same place that most of the girls who do it are.

[AlethiaSi]

Originally Posted by CallaLilly13

Thanks for the replies. I think my hesitation comes more from being nervous about my junior status affecting my recruitment. To complicate matters, I'm already involved with the school through another group and know a few of the girls in the sororities pretty well through this venue. So I'm worried that it's going to be awkward during and after. I guess my biggest fears are stemming from getting cut and feeling weird around them; especially since I've become friends with a couple of them. I haven't even mentioned to them that I'm considering going through recruitment. I’m not sure why my boyfriend doesn’t want me to do it. He’s older and has been out of undergrad for awhile. He thinks that I won’t have time and that I'm not in the same place that most of the girls who do it are.

Well, to me, it is more advantageous to have younger girls pledge, however, I don't think there is anything wrong with having upperclassmen pledge, in our org, it doesn't work against you though we do consider it. I think upperclassmen are often more enthusiastic and are more involved, maybe because they realize what life is like without a sisterhood. Idk how it is at other schools, but I think it's a shame for groups to completely rule girls out because of age.

In terms of another group, it might be slightly awkward if you and the girls make it so, but it's good that you are involved in other activities and this should be beneficial, especially already having connections to sisters in various organizations.

Also, with your boyfriend, he can have his opinions, but essentially this is your life. Thats all i'm going to say about that

Good luck in your decision, and as others have already said, recruitment does not automatically determine membership, go through it, and see how you feel
Read the other recruitment threads for advice and stories and know that everyone's experience is different It might be one of the best things to ever happen to you.