Rush at UCSC - Page 32

Peaches-n-Cream · #**466** 03-08-2002, 06:26 PM

I think that pledge activities are about building the bonds of sisterhood. I don't see the point of this exercise. We had a sorority on campus that wouldn't allowed their pledges to wear makeup during 'Hell Week' and it was not to show their natural beauty. It was to be mean to the pledges. I think that you don't need that in NBO.
I have found that it is better and easier to prevent a problem than to break a bad habit. I think treating your pledges disrespectfully can potentially become a bad habit and is best avoided. Your sorority should engage in team building exercises that teach mutual respect and emphasize the values that your sorority holds dear. I'm sure that there are many greeks here who will be happy to give you some constructive ideas for pledge activities. Think of your long term goal - affiliation with an NPC sorority. Don't do anything to jeopardize that. An allegation of hazing or being mean to pledges can be detrimental to your future. Stand firm on this one.
As far as feeling unappreciated, it goes along with being president or any other position. As the president, it is your job to lead and stand firm even when popular opinion goes against you. You need to have a clear vision of NBO and translate that to your sorority as clearly as you expressed it here in your earlier posts. Cheer up, Corina! Look how far you have come in only a few short months. This is just a little speed bump on the road to sisterhood. Hang in there!

volgirl2376 · #**467** 03-08-2002, 06:31 PM

i also agree it would could be considered hazing - from the little i have read in my new member education book -

- anything that is considered demeaning, makes the pledges feel uncomfortable, makes them feel singled out in anyway, and could pose any sort of humiliation or public embarrassment would be hazing. personally if someone sent me around campus without makeup or hair products - for even an hour - i would quickly lose interest in that group - and have a definate negative opinion about them -these are your future sisters...follow the golden rule!

CutiePie2000 · #**468** 03-08-2002, 06:40 PM

I was watching OPRAH the other day and she was talking about how most of all, people need to feel valued! I think the no-makeup concept is not a great one....hardly anyone wears Tammie Faye Bakker type of makeup so most people look like they're not wearing tonnes anyway. I think it would be better to do some sort of a philanthropy project. I posted on this thread a few pages earlier about a philanthropy project that you can do with Puffy Paint and makiing a Coloring Book for Blind/Visually Impaired Children. I think that would be much better. When we DGs did that at Recruitment, all the PNM's LOVED IT! You go, girl!!

mmcat · #**469** 03-08-2002, 06:41 PM

be brave and do the right thing. unless your actives are willing to do a day without "stuff", don't ask the pledges to. you might do it as a group bonding activity. i have students who can't get through a class period without eyebrow plucking, so it could be tough.
lol
mmcat

PenguinTrax · #**470** 03-08-2002, 06:54 PM

If it is an activity that only one segment of the membership takes part in, then it would be considered hazing by the NPC.

New member activities should give everyone a chance to bond with their new sisters. Search these boards - there are TONS of healthy, fun sisterhood/retreat/new member activity ideas. Take advantage of this resource and stand your ground.

Barbara

FuzzieAlum · #**471** 03-08-2002, 07:06 PM

No, no, no!

This will only teach them that beauty is natural if EVERYONE does it. If just the pledges do it, it will teach them that you aren't confident enough to be seen without makeup, and that you want to embarrass them by being seen without it!

Besides, where do you draw the line at looking natural? Bathing isn't natural. Heck, clothing isn't natural, but I don't think anyone wants their pledges or members to be unwashed and nekkid!

PKTKKG · #**472** 03-08-2002, 07:11 PM

Ditto everyone else on the no makeup pledge activity. Corina, this would definitely be considered hazing in an NPC group. Your members need to understand the criteria that NPC groups abide by, and hazing activities are not allowed.

Stand your ground. This could definitely deter an NPC group that is interested in NBO. Your members need to understand this. Would they want to be treated this way? Would they want an NPC group, parent, administrator, faculty member, etc. to know about or observe the activity? If the answer is no, then it's a pretty safe bet the activity involves hazing.

I agree that a pledge activity or retreat (with a new member chairman) would be a good activity. No alcohol is best since again, NPC does not allow alcohol for pledging, retreat, or initiation activities.

Let us know how things turn out. We care.

Sincerely,
Martha

Kappa Kappa Gamma

greeklawgirl · #**473** 03-08-2002, 07:20 PM

Corina, stand your ground! As you can see, we are all 100% behind you.

volgirl2376 · #**474** 03-08-2002, 07:46 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by FuzzieAlum
Besides, where do you draw the line at looking natural? Bathing isn't natural. Heck, clothing isn't natural, but I don't think anyone wants their pledges or members to be unwashed and nekkid!

Nekkid - lol! You crack me up

Also on the point of bathing not being natural...lord dont do this corina lol ...the BO in NBO might have a different meaning otherwise

33girl · #**475** 03-08-2002, 08:19 PM

One more saying that is definitely hazing! Hell, I'd rather get swatted silly than go out of the house without makeup!!

If you all want to do it together, and have a lock-in where you all sit around in your jammies, that is fun, but to tell the truth, this pledges going without makeup thing was in a book I read about a high school sorority. You are not in high school anymore.

Not only that, if you are trying to appeal to the campus at large, it might uncover some scary things that people don't need to know. I love my sisters dearly, but God bless cosmetics is all I can say!

I'm including myself in that, too!

TriSigmaTX · #**476** 03-09-2002, 02:02 AM

Wishinhopin, that's called hazing, email me if you want, but that is clearly hazing! You can't do that and shouldn't, I know you all don't have sanctions like NPC groups do, but if you do eventually want to be affiliated with NPC, I would strongly suggested against this.
Love,

justamom · #**477** 03-09-2002, 08:57 AM

As you can see, these ladies have defined this activity as hazing-no question.

The WAY you present this to the girls is going to be key. Do you have ANYONE who is of a like mind? Or, are you totally out their pulling it all together by yourself? You need backup! Someone who can "second" your ideas. Since you are the liason between your members and the NPC, you may want to simply say-"We are under great scrutiny and this activity could be construed as hazing. Let's not alienate any NPC group or our new pledges."

Your stress level must be sky high with your studies and work with NBO.(Others may be stressing too and you just aren't aware) You really need someone to help you...if nothing more than to act as a buffer-back you up-and perhaps deal directly with those who like to critique rather than actually WORK to make thing go. DELEGATE-DELEGATE-DELEGATE! People on the OTHER side may be feeling left out, like their thoughts aren't important.
Everthing can not be perfect. To focus on perfection is asking for disappointment.
Yes, be strong like the oak, but be able to bend like a willow.

aephi alum · #**478** 03-09-2002, 10:55 AM

LOL @ FuzzieAlum and Sarah

It's definitely hazing, unless you make it a voluntary activity for the entire sorority.

volgirl2376 · #**479** 03-09-2002, 11:01 AM

as to what justamom said....about finding a supporter - perhaps asking Mary (the girl who is in the other sorority and has been helping you) - she is from a NPC group and could totally tell these other girls the definition of hazing. i am sorry you are having so much trouble with your brand new sisters - just try to be more mature than they are acting -

DeltaBetaBaby · #**480** 03-09-2002, 12:38 PM

I haven't posted much on this thread, because others usually beat me to it, but I have followed it since the beginning.

Corinna,
As a former chapter president, I can tell you that the better a job you do, the more you will be unappreciated. You are handling problems on your own and always showing your chapter the positive side. As difficult as it may seem, you are doing them a lot of good by shielding them from some of the negativity.

As far as the no-makeup thing, it may be something you include for your private rituals. You can include it in your ritual book as generic instructions for all ceremonies. This is basically saying that when you come together as a sisterhood, you don't need to be fake in any way, and everyone is perfect as they are.