She loved the house. They would have been the same or better if she were there, too. (Based on photos, activities, and what she would have contributed via GPA, etc.)
Get in the wayback machine of your mind and pretend it's 1982 and you're an active collegiate member. Now read what you just wrote and tell me how it would make you feel about her, her daughter, and alumnae and legacies in general.
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It is all 33girl's fault. ~DrPhil
As much as you don't want to hear or believe it, what's done is done. You can't change what happened, so let it go. You say your daughter is happy - that's what is most important. This is HER Greek experience now, NOT YOURS. And stalking FB pages to "count legacies"? Yeesh.