HOW TO HELP A FRIEND???

blondie_babe · #1 08-18-2010, 09:55 PM

My friend went through fraternity recruitment and was very well liked by the different fraternities and was given his top picks. He went to a fraternity that I knew would bite him in the ass. It takes thick skin to join this frat. They are the athletic, cute, rich boys. Even if he was fitting in this was the frat that is more about social life, the right sorority girl, and being popular than brotherhood. Sure enough he ended up quitting after a brother backstabbed him out of jealousy. I was really proud of him for getting a bid because he is from here but had moved out of state for years. My problem is how to convince him that maybe it just wasn't meant for him. He tried to join the other frats that he had friends in and had initially wanted him but things were just awkward and deep down something didn't fit with him and them. It's hard to explain how you can be friends with someone but yet that you don't fit the image? He is really upset over how member's of the frats have said _______only got in bc of his 4.0 and nobody likes him. My friend agrees well that's not good for ___ but atleast he is in one. Another guy he is friends with went to school with a lot of his frat brothers and were never friends so it's like why can that dude join and not him?? It's hard for him because on paper everything is great, many family members who have been Greek (none chapters left on campus) but still a point to mention. I am having trouble helping him because I don't know how to explain that a homosexual latino was accepted into a top tier or a boy who was 1st in his family to go to college but not my friend. All I can tell him if you are friends with guys in it then that's the point not exactly being part of the fat. This is a competative school so I am thinking if he went back to where he lived maybe that would help? I am not trying to be rude but I know that many guys get in because they knew members for a long time. It just seems like bad luck for my friend and I feel bad for him when nobody I have ever known has been rejected from finding a place to fit in. Thanks for the advise if it isn't "oh go cry a river".

blondie_babe · #2 08-18-2010, 09:59 PM

Just to be completly forward I think it is Karma. He had a chance to join some great frats but didn't because at the moment it was a "bad year". We all know frat popularity changes with each pledge class but what can you tell a freshman caught up on hype? He could be in a fraternity that would build the right college values but he passed because of now graduated popular opinions. Either if he deserved the Karma it still sucks he is missing out on so much in college!

Drolefille · #3 08-18-2010, 10:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blondie_babe

Just to be completly forward I think it is Karma. He had a chance to join some great frats but didn't because at the moment it was a "bad year". We all know frat popularity changes with each pledge class but what can you tell a freshman caught up on hype? He could be in a fraternity that would build the right college values but he passed because of now graduated popular opinions. Either if he deserved the Karma it still sucks he is missing out on so much in college!

Fail.

Psi U MC Vito · #4 08-18-2010, 10:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blondie_babe

My friend went through fraternity recruitment and was very well liked by the different fraternities and was given his top picks. He went to a fraternity that I knew would bite him in the ass. It takes thick skin to join this frat. They are the athletic, cute, rich boys. Even if he was fitting in this was the frat that is more about social life, the right sorority girl, and being popular than brotherhood. Sure enough he ended up quitting after a brother backstabbed him out of jealousy. I was really proud of him for getting a bid because he is from here but had moved out of state for years. My problem is how to convince him that maybe it just wasn't meant for him. He tried to join the other frats that he had friends in and had initially wanted him but things were just awkward and deep down something didn't fit with him and them. It's hard to explain how you can be friends with someone but yet that you don't fit the image? He is really upset over how member's of the frats have said _______only got in bc of his 4.0 and nobody likes him. My friend agrees well that's not good for ___ but atleast he is in one. Another guy he is friends with went to school with a lot of his frat brothers and were never friends so it's like why can that dude join and not him?? It's hard for him because on paper everything is great, many family members who have been Greek (none chapters left on campus) but still a point to mention. I am having trouble helping him because I don't know how to explain that a homosexual latino was accepted into a top tier or a boy who was 1st in his family to go to college but not my friend. All I can tell him if you are friends with guys in it then that's the point not exactly being part of the fat. This is a competative school so I am thinking if he went back to where he lived maybe that would help? I am not trying to be rude but I know that many guys get in because they knew members for a long time. It just seems like bad luck for my friend and I feel bad for him when nobody I have ever known has been rejected from finding a place to fit in. Thanks for the advise if it isn't "oh go cry a river".

Scratches head. Ok I'm having trouble understanding what you are trying to say.

ThetaPrincess24 · #5 08-19-2010, 12:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Psi U MC Vito

Scratches head. Ok I'm having trouble understanding what you are trying to say.

Me too!!

Drolefille · #6 08-18-2010, 10:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blondie_babe

My friend went through fraternity recruitment and was very well liked by the different fraternities and was given his top picks.

Good

Quote:

He went to a fraternity that I knew would bite him in the ass. It takes thick skin to join this frat.

Bad.

Quote:

They are the athletic, cute, rich boys.

Boring.

Quote:

Even if he was fitting in this was the frat that is more about social life, the right sorority girl, and being popular than brotherhood. Sure enough he ended up quitting after a brother backstabbed him out of jealousy.

Bad.

Quote:

I was really proud of him for getting a bid because he is from here but had moved out of state for years. My problem is how to convince him that maybe it just wasn't meant for him.

Why?

Quote:

He tried to join the other frats that he had friends in and had initially wanted him but things were just awkward and deep down something didn't fit with him and them. It's hard to explain how you can be friends with someone but yet that you don't fit the image?

No?

Quote:

He is really upset over how member's of the frats have said _______only got in bc of his 4.0 and nobody likes him. My friend agrees well that's not good for ___ but atleast he is in one.

Bitter.

Quote:

Another guy he is friends with went to school with a lot of his frat brothers and were never friends so it's like why can that dude join and not him??

Because.

Quote:

It's hard for him because on paper everything is great, many family members who have been Greek (none chapters left on campus) but still a point to mention.

So?

Quote:

I am having trouble helping him because I don't know how to explain

Obvious.

Quote:

that a homosexual latino

Really? D<

Quote:

was accepted into a top tier or a boy who was 1st in his family to go to college but not my friend.

Bitter.

Quote:

All I can tell him if you are friends with guys in it then that's the point not exactly being part of the fat.

Typo

Quote:

This is a competitive school so I am thinking if he went back to where he lived maybe that would help?

Why?

Quote:

I am not trying to be rude but I know that many guys get in because they knew members for a long time.

*sigh*

Quote:

It just seems like bad luck for my friend and I feel bad for him when nobody I have ever known has been rejected from finding a place to fit in.

Lies.

Quote:

Thanks for the advise if it isn't "oh go cry a river".

Oh go cry a river.

blondie_babe · #7 08-18-2010, 10:07 PM

How do I make him feel better? I see no reason for someone to not find atleast 1 place to be and so it boils down to he has this huge regret for going one place and it not working out. I don't have the answers for how a homosexual or a guy who gets in bc he has a 4.0 and yet my friend can't be part of something. Like my friend does checks and balances. It isn't like there are openly things against him like say going to a conservative school and being homosexual and still joining a top tier frat.

Drolefille · #8 08-18-2010, 10:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blondie_babe

How do I make him feel better? I see no reason for someone to not find atleast 1 place to be and so it boils down to he has this huge regret for going one place and it not working out. I don't have the answers for how a homosexual or a guy who gets in bc he has a 4.0 and yet my friend can't be part of something. Like my friend does checks and balances. It isn't like there are openly things against him like say going to a conservative school and being homosexual and still joining a top tier frat.

You're both losers who think being gay is a bad thing.

Also you say "homosexual" a lot.

ladygreek · #9 08-18-2010, 10:14 PM

Drolefille, I am so glad you undertood the poster, because I got lost in the essay.

Drolefille · #10 08-18-2010, 10:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ladygreek

Drolefille, I am so glad you undertood the poster, because I got lost in the essay.

For a limited definition of "understood."

But it's what i do.

preciousjeni · #11 08-19-2010, 12:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Drolefille

You're both losers who think being gay is a bad thing.

Also you say "homosexual" a lot.

I got as far as this post and lost it. LOL! Lemme catch my breath. Hang on...

Psi U MC Vito · #12 08-19-2010, 01:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Drolefille

Also you say "homosexual" a lot.

Probably trying to avoid sounding bigoted by using the scientific term. It fails horrible btw.

Drolefille · #13 08-19-2010, 08:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Psi U MC Vito

Probably trying to avoid sounding bigoted by using the scientific term. It fails horrible btw.

Particularly when it's pretty much only a clinical/scientific term now. Varies by region of course, but for the most part I've seen a push against using the word for anything.

MysticCat · #14 08-19-2010, 09:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blondie_babe

Maybe I make it confusing.

And maybe the sky is dark at night.

Quote:

Originally Posted by blondie_babe

Don't try to play like everyday in a southern state does a gay minority get into a heavily ranked frat.

Oh boy. Another embarrassment to the rest of us Southerners.

Quote:

Originally Posted by blondie_babe

I am very open to posting his former chapter at UNC.

Yeah, UNC is such an intolerant university.

Quote:

I am very open to list the homosexual because I know him and the others mentioned. Don't think I am above posting very personal information to prove my point.

You have a point?

Yep. Clearly the return of a troll.

blondie_babe · #15 08-18-2010, 10:10 PM

I would be bitter also if my friend had a friend who was accepted into a frat with guys he knew a long time and they didn't like him but they were all close with my friend. That kind of stuff doesn't add up.

Maybe I make it confusing. My friend is guy A who is close with guys B but guy C went to school with guys B and they weren't friends. Guy C and guys B are now frat brothers but not my friend who has close family ties to them.