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12-28-2005, 10:40 PM
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Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Rock Hill, SC
Posts: 952
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Hate at First Sight
OK, so we all hear about people who "Just KNEW" when they first met their husband/wife... Well, does anyone have stories about hating their spouse... or just plain being unsure??
I'm sorry, but I find it hard to believe that people just know that they're going to be together from the second they meet... there are so many factors. So, I was just wondering if anyone had stories that weren't, "Oh, I just knew he was the one when I saw him walk through the door."
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12-28-2005, 11:01 PM
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Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: vegas by way of NEEEW YORRRK
Posts: 303
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the first guy i dated out here in vegas i HATED from the moment i saw him.
im from this predominantly (sp?) italian city back in new york, and moving to vegas was a big change for me .. i was used to seeing people in ya know gold jewelry and always in jeans and a sweater or something along those lines ... anyways, i move out here, go to my FIRST class of my FIRST semester at UNLV, and i had just decided to rush sigma kappa, so i was a little freaked out about that, and this kids sitting across the row from me with his tall spiky hair and socks pulled up to his calves with sneakers on (which i might add they call TENNIES ?? wtf?? ) and i just looked at him, and god forgive me, but i just scowled. i was like WHERE ON EARTH DID I CHOOSE TO GO TO SCHOOL?? i was not at all into the cali surf scene or whatever you call it, and this was this kid to a T. .... then he opened his mouth, and then out came that he was in a fraternity, and my mouth hit the floor i was like if this is what the kids in fraternitys and sororities look like - i am never EVER gonna fit in with my dark hair and gold necklaces and bracelets.
come to find out, he wasnt that bad of a guy. we dated for about 3 years .......
hope this is the kind of story you were looking for!
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12-28-2005, 11:16 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 283
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My fiancee and I didn't like each other at first because I was young and thought there was no way I could date a guy that wasn't in a fraternity and he thought I was going to be a stuck up bitch because of the sorority I was in. He assumed that I was a snotty southern belle princess type and I thought he must suck because if he didn't he would have been in a fraternity (I know, I know like I said I was young).
When we finally had a decent discussion we found out that we both grew up in PA, pretty close to each other. He said I won him over with my love for the Steelers. He won me over because he is the sweetest guy I've ever met.
So we're still together, we got engaged in April, I found out I was pregnant in May.
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12-29-2005, 10:25 AM
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Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: New England
Posts: 9,328
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My wife and I were friends for two years before we started dating. We each dated other people, and our junior year decided we should try dating. Things took off from there, but it certainly wasn't a "I need to be with you forever" from first sight.
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12-29-2005, 12:03 PM
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Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Over the Rainbow!!
Posts: 356
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When I first met my husband I thought he was totally obnoxious. He was a little drunk at the time and when he found we went to rivial state schools he tried to start talking smack about it to me. I totally ignored him. Then one year later we met again under different circumstances and became friends first and then dated.
The funny thing about it is that he doesn't even remember meeting me that first time. I had to get a friend that was there, and sober, to convince him about the first time we met.
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12-29-2005, 02:20 PM
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Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Rock Hill, SC
Posts: 952
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That makes me feel so much better! I just started dating a guy, and he's truly terriffic, but I'm having panic attacks because I don't have that cosmic feeling that he's "the one." I don't want to have to go through another breakup, but I'm really stressed that if I don't feel that way about him, I'm going to have to. It's that "leap of faith" thing that I'm struggling with.
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12-29-2005, 02:48 PM
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Join Date: Nov 2003
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Before I give my opinion, I'd like to state that Mr. AXiD670 and I will celebrate our fourth wedding anniversary in March.
I never had that "he's the one" feeling either. I kept waiting for it. It was weird 'cause I thought I had that feeling w/ two of my ex-boyfriends, which of course, wasn't right.
I think that so many women are told from the time they're little girls that, "You'll know when he's the one!" that they spend a majority of their serious relationships wondering why they don't have that feeling yet.
When he asked me to marry him, I was quite shocked. I hadn't really thought about marrying him. When we started dating, he had sort of fallen in my lap. I told him I didn't want anything serious. Buying me a ring is pretty serious!
I said yes to his proposal b/c our relationship was just so different from all the previous ones. He was a different type of guy. He wasn't anything like I had pictured (of course, I assumed my future husband would be tall, dark and handsome). He treated me differently than any of my other boyfriends. He just "fit" into my life. Oh, and I loved him.
I don't know how else to explain it.
Don't worry about that feeling. Yes, I think some people have it, but I don't think it's as common as people make it out to be.
Who knows, maybe I'll be getting a divorce this time next year?
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12-29-2005, 07:20 PM
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Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Beyond
Posts: 5,092
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I had that feeling "oh yeah, he's the right one baby, uh huh!"...
But my parents on the other hand... Whoo hoo. You'd never think for a million years they'd get married...
My mom first saw my dad, drunk and he knocked over a punch bowl at a party--this is like back in the late '50's early 60's...
Then, she was on a date with some other guy when my dad was on a date with some other girl. A quasi-group date thing. My dad had the car... Anyhow, they all went to the party, then after the party, my mom and her date were thinking they'd get a ride back, but my dad said to them, "where we're goin' y'all cain't go..." So my mom and her date had to walk back to their respective dorms...
And then one time, my mom was out on date with another guy at a basketball game, and my dad, drunk, came upto the guy, and said to him, "Why you with my girlfriend???"
Needless to say, my folks eloped and have been married for ~45 years...
So you never know how things will work out if you don't give it a try...
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12-29-2005, 09:32 PM
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Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Rock Hill, SC
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Well, this may all be moot anyway... I got a call from him today, and he's trying to get some closure from a 2-year relationship he got out of 6 months ago. He says that he still wants to stay with me, but I'm not sure. I think I jinxed it by talking about it on GreekChat! :-P The funny thing is, he asked me over Christmas why I hadn't told my parents about him, and I told him that every time I tell my parents about a guy, the relationship ends in less than a week. He made such a big deal about the fact that he was planning on sticking around for a while, that I finally broke down and told them. Stupid, stupid!
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12-29-2005, 09:54 PM
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Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Lexington, KY, USA
Posts: 3,185
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Quote:
Originally posted by CarolinaDG
I got a call from him today, and he's trying to get some closure from a 2-year relationship he got out of 6 months ago. He says that he still wants to stay with me, but I'm not sure.
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I'm not sure if you want that, either. If he's not done dealing with his issues after 6 months, good Lord, you might want to think twice.
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12-30-2005, 12:46 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Naptown
Posts: 6,608
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Re: Hate at First Sight
Quote:
Originally posted by CarolinaDG
I'm sorry, but I find it hard to believe that people just know that they're going to be together from the second they meet... there are so many factors. So, I was just wondering if anyone had stories that weren't, "Oh, I just knew he was the one when I saw him walk through the door."
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Honestly, I really did know within a few minutes of meeting my husband that he was "the one". But I think that is really rare. And don't forget, you don't hear about the people who *thought* they found "The One" after a few minutes but it turned out to actually be "NOT The One"!
As far as "Hate at First Sight", that's happened with me twice. The first time was with the girl who was my chapter's Rush Chair when I was going through Rush. The second time was, of all things, the woman I reported directly to at my first job out of college.
I really couldn't say exactly *why* I couldn't stand either of them (and, I suspect, vice versa) the minute I met them. I swear, it must have been a chemical thing or something! We were always polite to one another and were able to work together, but it was just shared knowledge that we couldn't stand one another. Weird.
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12-30-2005, 01:31 PM
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Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: Mile High America
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Interesting question. I seldom ever look in this forum.
I suspect that Mrs. DA was pretty sure we were a couple because she dumped the guy she was dating (leader of the rock group she was singing with) right away.
I, on the other hand, was dating a lot of different women at the time and, while I realized she was/IS pretty special, it took me a while to figure out just how special.
Of course the class we met in was about half Delts, and I figured I'd better make my move before one of my brothers did.
We had our 35th anniversary last July.
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The above is the opinion of the poster which may or may not be based in known facts and does not necessarily reflect the views of Delta Tau Delta or Greek Chat -- but it might.
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12-30-2005, 01:35 PM
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Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: the nation's capital
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My boyfriend and I started casually dating about 5 years ago, when we were both coming out of messy breakups. We didn't like each other that much but we each wanted someone to hang out with rather than being alone. I guess we just grew on each other.
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12-30-2005, 01:39 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Naptown
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Quote:
Originally posted by DeltAlum
I suspect that Mrs. DA was pretty sure we were a couple because she dumped the guy she was dating (leader of the rock group she was singing with) right away.
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I didn't know that Mrs. DA used to be a rocker chick! Very cool!
__________________
I ♥ Delta Zeta ~ Proud Mom of an Omega Phi Alpha and a Phi Mu
"I just don't want people to go around thinking I'm the kind of person who doesn't believe in God or voted for Kerry." - Honeychile
Hail to Pitt!
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12-30-2005, 01:54 PM
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Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: Mile High America
Posts: 17,088
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Quote:
Originally posted by KillarneyRose
I didn't know that Mrs. DA used to be a rocker chick! Very cool!
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Yup, and I was a Disc Jockey "playing the hits" at a local radio station. If that isn't a match made in heaven...
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Fraternally,
DeltAlum
DTD
The above is the opinion of the poster which may or may not be based in known facts and does not necessarily reflect the views of Delta Tau Delta or Greek Chat -- but it might.
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