DOT Clears Santa's Flight

CanadianTeke · #1 12-23-2005, 08:55 AM

Santa Gets Cleared For Christmas Flight

Kris Kringle, d.b.a. Santa Claus, got the green light today from the U.S. Department of Transportation (DOT) to engage in air travel to various points throughout the United States the night of Dec. 24-25.

An order granting a flight certificate and signed by U.S. Transportation Secretary Norman Y. Mineta said that Santa Claus was Aexceptionally fit, joyfully willing and uniquely able to engage in the interstate air transportation for which he has requested a certificate.” The Secretary added that Santa has a 100 percent on-time arrival record, having never failed to deliver all of his toys by Christmas morning.

In his application, Santa Claus described himself as a citizen of the world residing at the North Pole who performs a vital and specialized transportation service. AThe points to be served are the dwelling places of good girls and boys, as well as adults of goodwill, throughout the United States,” Claus said in his application.

The applicant notes that his operating proposal will meet the air service requirements of countless small communities, and also will serve the major transportation hubs in all regions.

Santa Claus also told DOT that his sleigh will be powered by eight tiny reindeer, with the addition of a possible ninth reindeer with a special air navigation warning light in its nose, in the event of fog or heavy snow.

Finally, the applicant, aware of the department’s heightened security concerns, states that he has personally packed all his bags and has kept them in his sight for months. He also vouches for his trusted elves, who lovingly prepared the contents and carefully handled the packing as they have done for centuries without incident. Santa also says that he has a sky marshal of sorts aboard. He has asked his lead reindeer, Rudolph, to stay especially alert, especially for the presence of nearby aircraft.

The department said that no one has opposed the application, and Mr. Claus disclosed several million letters of support from children everywhere. AIn these circumstances, it appears that a grant of the applicant=s request is in the highest public interest,” the department said.

Rio_Kohitsuji · #2 12-23-2005, 09:41 AM

Awww!!! That's just TOO cute!

DeltAlum · #3 12-23-2005, 11:34 AM

The U.S. Government knows that Santa is OK.

They've had his phone tapped for years...

sigtau305 · #4 12-23-2005, 12:04 PM

Nice.

veemers · #5 12-23-2005, 01:22 PM

there's supposed to be freezing rain in milwaukee. what if santa isn't cleared to land here?

*freaks out about not getting any presents*

dzrose93 · #6 12-23-2005, 01:31 PM

I love this.

I remember the local news doing a Santa Report on Christmas Eve each year when I was little. The weatherman would break in to the regular news report every few minutes to show a map of the city with a sleigh image hovering over the street where Santa had been spotted most recently. We used to hop into bed as soon as he was seen in our area.

DeltAlum · #7 12-23-2005, 01:37 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by dzrose93
I love this.

I remember the local news doing a Santa Report on Christmas Eve each year when I was little. The weatherman would break in to the regular news report every few minutes to show a map of the city with a sleigh image hovering over the street where Santa had been spotted most recently. We used to hop into bed as soon as he was seen in our area.

We did the same thing when I directed TV newscasts.

NORAD put out a piece a few years ago showing the Air Force tracking Santa on their big screens at Cheyenne Mountain, then we would electronically key a pic of the sleigh, etc. over our local weather radar.

It was fun.

dzrose93 · #8 12-23-2005, 01:41 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by DeltAlum
We did the same thing when I directed TV newscasts.

NORAD put out a piece a few years ago showing the Air Force tracking Santa on their big screens at Cheyenne Mountain, then we would electronically key a pic of the sleigh, etc. over our local weather radar.

It was fun.

I think it's great that the media gets in on the Christmas spirit that way. The little kids love it.

I also used to love the Santa Mailbox that my local post office put out every year for kids' letters to the North Pole.

aephi alum · #9 12-23-2005, 07:33 PM

Very cute.

Quote:

Originally posted by DeltAlum
The U.S. Government knows that Santa is OK.

They've had his phone tapped for years...

LOL!

Tom Earp · #10 12-24-2005, 09:33 AM

SEE, I knew there was a Santa Claus!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hoosier · #11 12-24-2005, 02:35 PM

Cease-Fire's Greetings
While we (OJ) weren't looking, apparently they resolved the "war over Christmas." Christmas will be this Sunday, and Monday, Dec. 26, will be a "holiday." Fine by us--we'll see you Tuesday.