need advice

[tunatartare]

Ok so I'm a pretty cynical person and I don't believe in love and stuff like that. Which is fine. Then yesterday, my boyfriend of two months turns to me and tells me that he loves me. I just stared at him looking like a deer looking into headlights for what had to have been the longest three minutes of my life. Later that night I told him that I don't believe in love. In retrospect, I now realize that it wasn't the smartest thing to do, but I was really freaked. My question is, what happens now?

[AGDee]

Chances are, he'll leave and find someone who shares his belief systems. Or, he'll try really hard to make you love him and "convert you".

I've gotta be one of the most cynical people on this board and even I believe in love. You sure you're not just in denial?

[UKDaisy]

Have you had really bad experiences or guys that totally suck? B/c that right there will make you say "you know what, screw it. I hate love and it just really doesn't exist!". I have to say I"m very harsh about love right now. But its b/c of I"ve treated bad lately. But all in all I still believe in love.

Do you really like this guy? B/c if you do....I'm afraid that now he'll feel like there's no chance and he might leave.

Maybe just have a heart to heart. I'm afraid if you don't, he might just say "there's no need of me being here."

Also, I agree with whats already been stated, are you in denial? I know thats hard to admit - but it could be a factor.

If he's a good guy, you're gonna wanna hold on to him. Unless you really don't care. So maybe just have a heart to heart and express your concerns and your thoughts on love. As long as its not "love doens't exist and its stupid"

GOod luck girl... let us know what happens

[tunatartare]

Originally posted by UKDaisy
Have you had really bad experiences or guys that totally suck? B/c that right there will make you say "you know what, screw it. I hate love and it just really doesn't exist!". I have to say I"m very harsh about love right now. But its b/c of I"ve treated bad lately. But all in all I still believe in love.

Do you really like this guy? B/c if you do....I'm afraid that now he'll feel like there's no chance and he might leave.

Maybe just have a heart to heart. I'm afraid if you don't, he might just say "there's no need of me being here."

Also, I agree with whats already been stated, are you in denial? I know thats hard to admit - but it could be a factor.

If he's a good guy, you're gonna wanna hold on to him. Unless you really don't care. So maybe just have a heart to heart and express your concerns and your thoughts on love. As long as its not "love doens't exist and its stupid"

GOod luck girl... let us know what happens

Pretty much yea. I've had some really horrible experiences with guys in the past and have been hurt pretty badly which has turned me into the cynic I am today. I told him that I like him and I care a lot for him. I just don't want him to break up with me and to think that the relationship was a total waste or something like that.

[Lindz928]

Originally posted by KLPDaisy
Pretty much yea. I've had some really horrible experiences with guys in the past and have been hurt pretty badly which has turned me into the cynic I am today. I told him that I like him and I care a lot for him. I just don't want him to break up with me and to think that the relationship was a total waste or something like that.

Then tell him that. Tell him about your past experiences and why it has made you so cynical. And tell him your fears.

Also, I think you should really think about this.... This guy LOVES you. How amazing does that feel? Does he treat you well? Does he make you feel beautiful and special and lucky? If so, then maybe you believe in love more than you might like to admit.

Is this a guy you could see yourself being with for a long time? Maybe forever? If the answer is yes then please keep yourself open to the idea of love...

And no matter what- TELL HIM everything that you are thinking and feeling.... If he really does love you, then he will want to hear it and talk about what is going on.

[Lady Pi Phi]

If you've had past relationship experiences that have caused you to be cynical, you need to be completely open and honest with him. Otherwise, I have to ask, why are you in a relationship if you don't believe in love?