Does Number of Sexual Partners Matter?

[James]

Ok, you really like someone, and three weeks into the relationship the dreaded "Sexual Past" questions come up.

How many partners would your SO have to admit to having been with (intercourse my dear young virgins) for it to matter to you?

Or would it matter at all?

1, 5, 10, 20, 50, 100, over a hundred, lost count over a hundred . . .

And why would or wouldn't it bother you?

[thesweetestone]

[James]

I know guys that think that any girl that has had more than three partners is basically a slut . . .

[ADPi~Ally]

It's a double standard. If a girl sleeps with 10 guys she's a slut, if a guy sleeps with 10 girls, he's the man.

For me if a guy sleeps with 10 or more girls, he's a male slut, and I wouldn't sleep with him. 5 or less is ideal.

Personally, if both partners are honest, and don't have a problem with the number, then go for it.

[XOMichelle]

It depends how old you are.
-M

[MSSTCY1]

I agree that it definetly depends on age...

taking it from a college stand point, I would say that anything over 15 I am starting to get iffy on the guy... over 20, its' a concern, 25 and up- he's just a player.

[White_Chocolate]

well, one of my many ex's number was 63. . .
that didn't bother me. . .
i know tons of girls whose number is over 25. . .
numbers is something from the early 90s. . .

some people lose their viriginity early. . .like 13 or 14 which is ridiculously slutty to me. . .
not me. . .i waited until i was 19. . .kind of mature but not immature

[sigmagrrl]

My recommendation: DON'T GO THERE! One person will always have more experience than the other and the dreaded and inevitable comparison situation will occur. LEAVE IT ALONE!

[aephi alum]

37.

Seriously - depends on age - though I'd be concerned if a guy of any age had had more than a few partners. You have to worry about STD's, and you have to worry about whether sex actually means anything to him.

And I totally hear you on the double standard for guys vs. girls.

[PhiSigFly]

Yeah, I definately agree about the double standard! I've been with 8 and I think thats too many. But I'm almost 21 and lost my virginity at 16, so really, its 2 guys a year, which I don't think is that slutty. My problem is I tend to date typical nice guys.. Like, I took 3 of the 8's virginities and have been more experienced then all but 2 of the others.... Its kinda uncomfortable so I avoid the sex conversation as much as possible!

[Kevin]

Here's the rule:

You're okay as long as your number of sexual partners does not exceed your age. For example, I'm 23 and it would be okay for me to have as many as 23 past sexual partners.

[aephi alum]

Originally posted by ktsnake
Here's the rule:

You're okay as long as your number of sexual partners does not exceed your age. For example, I'm 23 and it would be okay for me to have as many as 23 past sexual partners.

So if you're 12...

[Munchkin03]

In this day and age, I would be very very concerned about anyone around my age who had over 3. AIDS and HPV scare me more than anything, and frankly, condoms aren't 100% effective--especially with HPV, which has been linked to certain reproductive cancers. Like aephi alum said, you have to wonder if sex means anything to them--or if it's just a number. It's been part of my pre-hook up talk for time eternal--I'm not risking anything for the sake of comfort.

But, keep it safe, whether it's 1 or 1,000.

[Peaches-n-Cream]

I have met guys whose numbers range from 1 to 400. It depends on how old they are or rather when they were born. People who became sexually active before the mid 1980's have more partners than people who became sexually active after that date. I think that AIDS and herpes made people stop having random sex for about ten years. At least they became less randomly promiscuous and more into relationships.

If you are sexually active, get yourself tested for HIV, HPV, hepatitis, and all STDs regularly just be safe.

[Kevin]

Originally posted by aephi alum
So if you're 12...

Well obviously during those formative years you're just building up points for college