SG RHO.....YOUR FIRST LOVE?

[RHOyal-Silence]

hello sorors,
it's me again with a question. read this scenario and see what your reaction would be.

i recently met a young lady who at another school was involved in a process to becoming an AKA. however, the chapter got kicked off the yard for certain reasons. when the young lady transferred to my school, she expressed great interest in becoming a RHO. she went as far as confiding in me and trying to find out how my sorors and i felt about her. well the next thing i knew she was stepping at a Zeta coming out show. she is now wearing her letters of Z Phi B proudly.

my question to u is if u knew a person who has her heart set on another GLO but came to your org because she thought she had a chance,how would would u react?? What would u tell this person?
Was SIGMA GAMMA RHO or your GLO your first love?
please reply in sisterly love

[CodeBlue_R3]

Hello again everyone,

Even though I am not greek I feel I should say something to this matter. I feel that once you have your heart set on an organization that should be the organization you stick with even if it is impossible to go undergraduate. I personally feel that those who jump from organization to organization are only looking to be a part of something.
They may not be all that you think they are and might be more a disgrace to the organization while yet there may be a select few that represent that organization as if it was there first love.

I studied all the organizations and knew right off the back which one was the all or nothing pick. I feel that I shouldn't have to go intake as something else just because they aren't chartered at my campus yet.

Be a leader not a follower. I would question my own joining if I was to suddenly up and switch to any other organization. The question is 50 years from now will you still be proud to say that you are a "...". I'm willing to wait to go grad if nothing eventually happens.

But I do know of many who seek the next in line. That seems to be the daily ritual amongst a select few on my campus. For I will out of respect not mention the organizations they wanted to join and those they ended up or are now wanting to join.

I know everytime I look at them it's like how can they joan on this organization when it was first in there hearts. Or it's like they aren't even real they not a true ... they don't even wear letters and participate in the activities (yes I know many of them).
The more I look at it the more I use to question the sincerity of members of all organizations (fraternity and sorority). But during my quest I met many very very sincere members of there organizations and that was the sparkle that was put in my eye.

It was like before I studied the organizations I stereotyped them all from what I saw in each of the members that had simular characteristics (funny thing is I never could classify Sigma Gamma Rho I was always meeting someone who was different and had a completely different few as to why her organization was what she cherished.) But to get back on subject. That also answers a question that was posted earlier this week about why less people join organizations.

[prettypoodle6]

To answer your first question.....how would I react? That kinda depends on how involved the interest was/is. 2 of my neos were part of an interest group for another sorority for a quick minute. Once they got to know the members of that org and also those who where their potential line sisters-they left. They realized that was not for them. I have no problem with this kind of scenario-cause its all about learning and doing research and finding out what's right for you.

But I personally would NEVER extend membership to a woman who has taken part of the MIP or pledge process of another sorority. There's just no way! It shows a lack of dedication and trust, and I love my letters toooo much to give them to someone who wouldnt value them as much (if not more) than I do!

To answer the second part.........
I too did not want to go greek when I first got to college. The catfights, name callin, dime droppin (sorry to be so negative, but greek life on my campus was rowdy). But once the ladies of SGRho came to my campus to try to charter a chapter, I was hooked!

[SoloRHO]

Soror RHOyal Silence,
I think this is an interesting question. It sounds like the young lady you are talking about had absolutely NO org in her heart. She just wanted to be down with SOMEONE, ANYONE. That angers me for several reasons. It says that she doesnt value BGLO's and all we stand for very much.
I'd have to ask a person like that, why she wanted to join AKA. Then I'd ask her what changed her mind to SGRho. Then I'd ask if she wasnt sure when she went on for AKA how could I know that she's sure about SGRho. I think that during interview time we have a right to ask these questions. They aren't threatening questions. And out of respect for our org, and whatever org she pledged before, they NEED to be asked. If the girl seems sincere in her answers, I'd still wait to "put her down". You know that sometimes studnets (esp. those who transfer), only have about a semester to get to know the members of the org, and vice versa. There's no harm in waiting to get to know her better and in effect, know her heart beter. SGRho doesn't have to be your FIRST love. (Many people grow up with the Greek influence in their home. ANd after swearing up and down they want to be an "XYZ"m they get to college and see all there is to offer with the other orgs. They shouldnt be penalized for this.) But it does have to be your TRUE and FINAL love. Sometimes it takes people a while to see the LIGHT. And just because of that, it doesnt mean that they don't deserve to be called soror. It'd be nice if she had seen the LIGHT Earlier. But what's important is that she SEES it.

PEACE
SOLORHO

[blu_theatrics]

Well ladies, I will tell the absolute truth, like many I didn't know about all the sororities when I started school. So when I was thinking about just "going greek" high school, I was thinking of another organization, but the thing is that this org was no way in my heart because I knew nothing about it, it was just the only sorority I saw people in my family in.

Like I've said many times before, I really was not even going to join a sorority when I actually did get to college, because I still didn't understand it.

But once I got to know the ladies of Sigma Gamma Rho my whole attitude changed and I really still do think sometimes what if I would have went to another school and they had no SGRho's. No disresepct to any other organization, but it just makes me really sick to my stomach I fi Would have overlooked SGRho (the place were I truly belonged) to go with that other org that I had no love for.

I have talked to a girl who way before me wanted to be an SGRho, but didn't get an invitation, because of GPA reqiuremnts, but anyhow, she got her GPA up and then went to another org and I asked her, why didn't you come back to us and she was like because I liked them better then. I just can't understand that.

I think that is why I couldn't, wouldn't or even didn't even research that other org or really care for it, you know, because my heart was being prepared for the world of Sigma.

Personally, I could never see myself in another organization and it really hurts when I hear stories of girls who was a so and so hear and then went to another school and tried to be something else.

[EspeRHO]

Hi, once again I am new to the board, but I would like to post my opinion. Stuff like this happens all the time, and i have to question just like you was it really in her heart or did she just want to be apart of something. I had no intention of joining any sorority when I came to college. Then I met an SGRho and she introduced me to an organization full of love and sisterhood. I wanted to be an SGRho every since I was a freshmen, and I recently got my letters in the fall of 1999. I love my letters and I wore them proudly. SGRho was my first love and I wouldn't take nothing for it. My opinion is, if you want to join a sorority do it because your heart says so, not because you just want to be apart of something. When you get those letters that means you were willing to dedicate your life to that organization. So to answer your question what would I do in a situation like that, she would have to explain to me why she decided not to be an AKA anymore, why SGRho. Because I don't want anyone in my organization that doesn't have it in their heart cause they miss the whole point.

[Witty_1]

In response to your question, I must confess, in the interest of fairness, I attended other GLOs interest meetings. My parents encouraged me to meet all of the girls who were members and all of the girls who wanted to be members. When I saw my future sorors of Prairie View A&M University at a step show in Austin, I knew then where my heart belonged.
Many young women don't have this experience. They pledge because their friends are doing it or their mother was a member of a particular GLO. If that's the case, it's better that they don't pledge and try to fill that void through other non-greek letter organizations on their campuses. Every member of every GLO should have a warm feeling in their hearts for their organization, not a feeling of I did this because it was expected of me.

[faithdriver]

As an interest in your illustrious organization, I would like to respond to this scenario. First of all I would like to apologize up front if I offend any of you ladies. It is my desire to become apart of your family, but I would like to be honest with you and get your honest opinion.

In high school I was introduced to "greek life" through your usual stepshows and parties. I was fascinated by XYZ sorority because I thought they were great steppers and later I found out that some of the most successful women that I knew were members of XYZ. In retrospect I don't remember seeing any women of Sigma. As a matter of fact, when I went to an informational, with a friend, my freshman year, that was my initial contact with any of them. Once I started college, I gained a deeper knowledge of greek life and, of course, it's more than stepshows and parties. I didn't want to be a t-shirt wearer, nor did I want to belong to any organization that was known for such. The women of Sigma Gamma Rho on my campus encouraged me, and everyone else in the informational, to check out the other sororities before making any final decisions. My problem, at the time was that XYZ had been suspended on our campus. I hadn't abandoned hope of joining the organization, I just researched it to further my knowledge on something that I was planning to pledge my life to.

During this time I met a Sigma Gamma Rho, who was recent graduate of my school. She vaguely remembered me from the informational, but she befriended me. Shortly thereafter, I met her best friend, who was also an SG Rho, and she befriended me also. For the first couple of months of our friendship, greek affiliation was not mentioned, I was able to get to know them outside of their letters. I was pleased to know that they had been discussing me with their sorors, and they liked me enough to ask me if I was interested in joining their sorority. I hadn't told them, but since we met, I had started researching and trying to find out as much as I could about Sigma Gamma Rho. I didn't want them to think that I was trying to be their friends to get their letters. It was that certain something about them...the light of Sigma Gamma Rho shining through.

Anyways to make a long story short, once I looked at my reasons to think I wanted to become XYZ, they looked pretty shallow. I also realized that I didn't know any XYZs my age, or in undergrad. Everytime I asked for information, I never felt comfortable and I felt like I would be conforming, like a robot. I attributed this revelation to growth in general, and maturation as a result of paying attention to what was going on around me. The chapter for XYZ was resurrected, but I had no desire to be one anymore. Certain people made me feel like I was jumping ship, but I had made no move to join the organization. The ladies of Sigma Gamma Rho, here at my school, as well as others I have met, have embraced me as a person. They have not made me feel uncomfortable, nor have they made me feel scared to ask a question. I look at the chapter here at my school and I see REAL sisterhood, true dedication to our campus and the neighboring city. This is what I want in an organization. Serving my people cannot be done in a stepshow, and once the party is over, what else can be done? Sigma Gamma Rho has shown me that women of character bind together while others fall to the wayside. I am happy that God allowed me to meet these women before I stumbled into something for the wrong reasons.

My question is: since I have found out FOR MYSELF what it would mean to be greek, I decided that XYZ wasn't for me. I decided that I wanted to contribute to the work that Sigma Gamma Rho has done. What is your opinion? Responses from members only PLEASE!

[huRHOkane]

Im not gonna front...

Like "faithdriver" .. I also was caught up in the "name"... just like DKNY and POLO, when you look for jeans, you are going to get caught up on the "name" alone. Of course this is saying a lot of designer names has its flaws and we all know after about 3-4 washings, most of these designer things fall apart! *smile*

So faithdriver, I don't think that you are wrong for your getting "caught up" with designer labels and names so to speak. We all have done our share of getting caught up and findin out what's best or right, or wrong.... for all of us in the long run.

As for my soror's original question posted on the first topic....

Women/ men like that are basically jumpin on the first night train to Georgia. They want to be a part of a Greek letter so bad that they will go and intake with the first group of women/men that is going to intake them. I don't think any less of those types of greeks.. more power to them (i aint a hater!)...

... the only thing I think about is "thank GOD they didn't join my organization"

[Tre]

I hope it's ok that I reply to this, even though I'm not a member.

I guess many of us can say that we, at one time, fell into the category of a label. I am no exception. However, once I did my research, I realized that Sigma Gamma Rho had exactly what I was looking for. I sent an inquiry email thru the SGRho website on Friday, July 14. On Saturday, July 15, I met 4 SGRho alumni chapter members, including the membership chair. If that's not fate, I don't know what is! They were so friendly and courteous, and made me feel comfortable, just as all of you who have replied to my "Too excited" posts have been. Thank God for SGRho.

In response to the first question, I would respond to anyone interested in the organization with the same love and kindness that I was shown.

Tre

[SDiva22]

I have heard positive comments on both sides. I simply think that you have to be a strong woman to choose Sigma. It is really something to be able to walk against the tide. Although there are several sorors who are Sigmas because of influence from family and other Sigmas, there are many of us who were introduced in college. I thought that I wanted to be XYZ also because that was all I knew to be. However after looking closer at XYZ, I knew it was not for me. I still respect that organization, but realized that my gifts and talents could work for Sigma.

The young lady in the original story just wanted to be greek. I am not convinced that that is totally bad either. For some people, that is enough. Let's be real, we have all seen people come to Sigma and be hyped, then they fall off. We have no sure-fire way of really determining who is really down for the cause until, they get in.

------------------
To give is better than to receive.

[RHOyal-Silence]

i do believe in doing research for something u will be apart of for life. i do not look down on any soror whose first love was not SG RHO as long as it is their true love. so this advice goes out to all those who someday wish to become greek. if you are joining because it "looks good" then don't. if you are joining because you want to be popular then don't. if you are joining because your man/woman wants you to, then don't. greek life is enjoyable, but you have to work, work, and more work. too many people forget that bit of information before they join. make sure your reasons are legit. and good luck to anyone who plans to enter the greek family in the future

[BlueReign]

Dear Sister Tre

"I feel ya" E-mail me if you want to. I sense your excitement