Radiation and Chemotherapy

carnation · #1 05-01-2005, 02:31 PM

My father-in-law was diagnosed with lung cancer in November. He had beat it before with radiation but somehow the radiation screwed up his beautiful singing voice. This time they gave him chemo and the cancer didn't advance nor did it shrink. However, the chemo destroyed his sense of taste and wore him out. He hasn't been the same in months, this wonderful, selfless man.

Last month, the doctor said he figured that he had about 2 months to live.

If my father-in-law had known what the radiation and chemo were going to do to him, I think he would've refused both. At 6 feet tall, he's now down to about 120 pounds and I can only pray that his remaining weeks will be comfortable.

Now I know why when diagnosed with breast cancer, my mother and aunt had mastectomies but refused chemo and radiation. They said if the cancer came back, they'd rather die than go through what they'd seen their friends and one of their sisters did. Luckily, they've been cancer-free for years...but do any of you wonder whether chemo and radiation are even worth it? I mean, I've known a few people to be cured by one or both but it seems like usually, they suffer horribly from side effects and die anyway.

AchtungBaby80 · #2 05-01-2005, 02:36 PM

I'm so sorry about your father-in-law.

When my grandfather was diagnosed with cancer, he had all kinds of treatments...radiation for sure, maybe chemo. It made him so much sicker; he couldn't eat because he couldn't stand the taste of most foods, and even smelling food would make him nauseous. He could no longer stand to eat the foods he used to love. It was awful seeing him like that, and I wondered the same thing...is all that worth it?

In my mom's case, I think it was worth it because they caught her cancer early enough to where she's fine now, but they recommended radiation just in case they hadn't removed all the cancerous tissue. The treatments made her sooooooo tired, she couldn't even take me shopping for a prom dress, but now she's all right and I'm really glad for that.

damasa · #3 05-01-2005, 02:49 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by carnation
but do any of you wonder whether chemo and radiation are even worth it? I mean, I've known a few people to be cured by one or both but it seems like usually, they suffer horribly from side effects and die anyway.

Yes it does work. Yes it does suck. Yes people do suffer but no not everyone dies anyway.

Yes, it's worth it. In my case it worked and I'm grateful for it.

tunatartare · #4 05-01-2005, 03:09 PM

Carnation, I am so sorry about your father-in-law. When my grandfather was diagnosed with leukemia, the doctors told him that the cancer wasn't at an advanced stage and advised him not to go through with treatment for it because he was so sick (heart disease, diabetes, etc.) that the chemo would have hurt him more than helped him. When he passed away, he didn't even die from leukemia.

nucutiepie · #5 05-01-2005, 06:32 PM

I have very mixed feelings on it.

My mother had breast cancer when I was in high school - she had a lumpectomy and treatment with tamoxifen, and so far has been fine without chemo or radiation, God bless. (it was caught very early on).

My grandfather was diagnosed with stomach cancer, also when I was in high school. They gave him six months to live and recommended chemo and radiation - my family decided that if he was dying anyway, it was heartless to make him suffer through chemo and radiation. He wound up living four years and was relatively comfortable for three of those years.

My friend was diagnosed with cancer this year. He's 22. He's suffering through chemo and radiation now, but his long-term prospects are excellent... i guess i think it's strictly a case by case thing, and the age of the patient is important.

Tom Earp · #6 05-01-2005, 06:57 PM

Dad Had Radiation, hasnt been the same since!

Will bite a bullet first!

Take it to the bank!

Just love The Cure thatr fucks up Your Life from on out!

CUGreekgirl · #7 05-01-2005, 09:10 PM

Sorry to hear about your father in law

If it weren't for chemo and radiation I would have grown up motherless.

When I was 8 my mom was diagnosed w/ breast cancer. After her masectomy she had radiation. Because she was not able to work during this time she become my 2nd grade class' "class mom" I loved that my mom who was usually otherwise busy with work was able to use her time during radiation to devote to me and my class.

Summer 2003 she was diagnosed w/ colorectal cancer. She had to go through radiation before and after surgery as well as chemo before and after surgery. She dropped down to 90lbs (she's 5 ft 2). Chemo left her drained of all her energy, but she never gave up her will to live. It only took a few weeks after her last chemo for her to be back to her old self. She is now 67, works 30 hrs a wk (she considers that retired), participates in Bible Study weekly, is a member of the Red Hat society, takes care of 4 rambunctious dogs, cooks and cleans. yes, I thank god daily for chemo and radiation treatments.

aephi alum · #8 05-01-2005, 10:24 PM

I'm so sorry to hear about your father-in-law, Carnation. You are all in my thoughts and prayers... every one of you who has been through this or has had a family member or friend go through this. Chemo and radiation therapy are difficult treatments to endure, but they can help if the cancer is detected before it spreads.

honeychile · #9 05-01-2005, 10:44 PM

Carnation, I am so sorry to hear about your father-in-law.

I am very fortunate that my knowledge of cancer is from work, not my immediate family. What I've noticed (as a geriatric counselor) is not whether or the cancer patient selects radiation or chemo or both - it's their attitude. If the patient has a positive attitude, a need and desire to survive, he will do MUCH better than others. When negative people are around, it's harder to maintain that attitude.

Crazy as it may seem, I really do feel that some people in this situation chose when to die. "I'm going to dance at my daughter's wedding!" or "I'll be 60 in two more months," or whatever - many clients have asked me the date, as if they're counting out their days.

I'm sure your family will be do their best to keep your fil comfortable. I truly hope that they can prolong his quality of life!

Peaches-n-Cream · #10 05-01-2005, 10:46 PM

Carnation, I am so sorry that your father-in-law is going through this. You and your family are in my prayers.

I can't really comment with any authority about chemo or radiation.

AWJDZ · #11 05-02-2005, 09:24 AM

I am soo sorry to hear about your father-in-law...

all of your families are in my thoughts and prayers.

3 months ago, my mom was diagnonsed with colon, liver, and lung cancer. One of her diabetic meds. had masked all the symptoms and she had not had a colonospy (sp) in about 7 years. She is 57 years old and they believe that she has been walking around with this for about 3 years. Her meds. made all of her lab results come back normal and her symptoms were the same as the side effects of the drug.

She has been on IV chemo and takes 2 doses of oral chemo for 21 days and then 7 days off. It is rough, there is no getting around that. She also goes in for iron infusions, platelet replacements, shots, and how knows what else. There is not a day or night that I do not pray that we will all get through this. She is very determined that she will do what it takes. If it were not for the chemo, they said we would have around 4-6 months with her. Her cancer counts continue to drop after every round. Her dr. is very hopeful and optimisitc. There days that she does suffer, she is tired, and she feels like crap....but for every day that she feels like that, there is a day were she shops, cleans, gardens, and lives normally. We pray that one day, all of her days will be like that.

My grandfather was diagnosed with pancratic cancer, refused all treatment and was gone with weeks.

GeekyPenguin · #12 05-02-2005, 10:03 AM

My mom had radiation when I was 2. She's been in remission since I was 3. I'm almost 22. I'd say it was worth it.

honeychile · #13 05-02-2005, 10:16 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by AWJDZ

My grandfather was diagnosed with pancratic cancer, refused all treatment and was gone with weeks.

Not to be a voice of gloom and doom, but pancreatic cancer is usually the hardest to beat, and the quickest.

I usually cringe when one of those cases come in.

FSUZeta · #14 05-02-2005, 12:16 PM

dear carnation, i too would like to let you know that your father-in-lawand your family will be in our prayers.

i agree with an earlier poster, that chemo and/or radiation sre best decided on a case by case basis. i have a dear friend here in naples who had lymphoma-she literally almost died. they gave her massive doses of chemo and brought her back from the brink. this was about 8 years ago and is doing great. but, as honeychile says, attitude seems to make a huge impact . my friend never held a pity party and was constantly upbeat and positive. a true rolemodel!!

our niece was diagnosed with lukemia when she was 5. chemo cured her. she is now 16, healthy and a star athelete!!

astroAPhi · #15 05-02-2005, 12:48 PM

carnation, I'm so sorry about your father in law. My grandpa's funeral was a week ago from today, so I understand what your family is going through. In his case, it seems like it was more the treatment that killed him than the cancer. He got too dehydrated from the chemo and had an infection in his mouth. The cancer was supposedly gone, but they told him he should finish the treatments anyway. A whole lot of good that did him. To be fair, he was 80 years old and lived a good long life. But I wish we had just forgone the treatment because he was simply too weak to do it.

My other grandpa passed away from cancer a year and a half ago at age 83. The small doses of radiation he got were enough to keep him comfortable and give him about 6 more months with us. He never got sick from the treatments and it was only his last few days that were bad.

I think chemo and radiation can do wonderful things for some people, but isn't a viable treatment for all people. In the case of the elderly, I think it's just a good idea to make them comfortable so that they can put their affairs in order and go out peacefully.