Brainy women have trouble finding men

[Taualumna]

http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=stor...n_050102204340

While it's true that women who concentrate with their careers are less likely to find men, I have issues with the fact that the article implies that women who choose marriage over career are seen as "less bright".

[aephi alum]

I've got issues with that too, but what bothers me more is the article's implication that a woman cannot have both a marriage and a career.

[Taualumna]

The article says that men want women to be a copy of their mothers. Younger men probably had moms who worked, so does that mean they want a wife that works or one that is an opposite of their mom?

[sugar and spice]

Originally posted by Taualumna
The article says that men want women to be a copy of their mothers. Younger men probably had moms who worked, so does that mean they want a wife that works or one that is an opposite of their mom?

I don't know, but either way that assumption creeps me out.

I don't think the author of the article says anywhere that women who get married are less smart (although one of the people quoted does guess that might be a reason why). It does actually back up the claim that women with low IQs are more likely to get married.

Now it would be interesting to know if women with higher IQs aren't getting married as often because a) they don't want to or b) they CAN'T. I think this is a really interesting conclusion that deserves more study.

[DeltAlum]

Hey, Mrs. DA had no trouble at all.

I met her in a class and there were two of my pledge brothers, one of our actives and several other guys from the Radio-TV Department, along with the lead singer of the band she sang in.

I figured I'd better move first, or I'd be left in their dust.

[GeekyPenguin]

Originally posted by Taualumna
The article says that men want women to be a copy of their mothers. Younger men probably had moms who worked, so does that mean they want a wife that works or one that is an opposite of their mom?

That is CREEPY.

[PhiPsiRuss]

Originally posted by GeekyPenguin
That is CREEPY.

Extremely.

[valkyrie]

Originally posted by sugar and spice
I don't know, but either way that assumption creeps me out.

It is indeed creepy. I don't think it's really true.

[moe.ron]

Originally posted by Taualumna
The article says that men want women to be a copy of their mothers. Younger men probably had moms who worked, so does that mean they want a wife that works or one that is an opposite of their mom?

Oedipus complex

[SmartBlondeGPhB]

There is a member of my alumnae chapter in her 40's who's never been married and a couple of years ago we were having this very same conversation. She has a number of female friends who are divorced and she said they were all finding that yes, indeed, men in their generation DID want wives that were like their mothers. BUT, the women in her generation were either divorced or never got married in the first place so they were happily supporting themselves and weren't looking for a man to take care of them. Definite disconnect........

I was raised to be self sufficient and not rely on anyone but myself, I saw too much divorce growing up to ever think that I would have a man who would ALWAYS be there to support me.

Through dating, I have found that some men are intimidated by women (IQ is irrelevant) who have absolutely no NEED for them. I'm not being mean there, just pointing out that a woman (like myself) who has gone to grad school, has a career, and is more than capable of taking care of herself doesn't want a man who is going to try to take care of her. She wants one who can be her equal and share in life. The only men I ever NEED are plumbers and electricians and I can hire those. The distinction is between NEED and WANT and it is huge.

I am not married (at 35) and my response to anyone would be that so far in life "I've had better things to do". I am now starting a new career which if done properly, will set me up for life.

Not to mention that I've become pretty picky in my old age and have yet to find any guy I would want to be married to (and vice versa).

[XOMichelle]

Smartblonde-
Old age??? you are not old

[James]

Just a side note. I am not sure men are intimidated by women that don't need them per se, I think men can be turned off by certain aspects of body language and speech.

Men have a certain expectation of how women are supposed to carry themselves and speak and when that doesn't happen, the man may not "connect" with her romantically. Thats regardless of her financial condition or her emotional neediness.

Originally posted by SmartBlondeGPhB


I was raised to be self sufficient and not rely on anyone but myself, I saw too much divorce growing up to ever think that I would have a man who would ALWAYS be there to support me.

Through dating, I have found that some men are intimidated by women (IQ is irrelevant) who have absolutely no NEED for them. I'm not being mean there, just pointing out that a woman (like myself) who has gone to grad school, has a career, and is more than capable of taking care of herself doesn't want a man who is going to try to take care of her. She wants one who can be her equal and share in life. The only men I ever NEED are plumbers and electricians and I can hire those. The distinction is between NEED and WANT and it is huge.

Originally posted by James
Just a side note. I am not sure men are intimidated by women that don't need them per se, I think men can be turned off by certain aspects of body language and speech.

Men have a certain expectation of how women are supposed to carry themselves and speak and when that doesn't happen, the man may not "connect" with her romantically. Thats regardless of her financial condition or her emotional neediness.

Yeah, but in that case, the article suggests that women who carry themselves and speak intelligently will not be able to get this "connection" and I really dont agree with that. If a guy expects me to carry myself like an airhead, what does that say about him?

Hmm...I wouldnt usually think this, but maybe its a cultural difference?? I dont know much about the british and their view of gender roles. Oh, but I do know they have bad teeth.

[AGDee]

The article comes to conclusions using statistics that don't say that at all.

All the study said was:
The study found the likelihood of marriage increased by 35 percent for boys for each 16-point increase in IQ.


But for girls, there is a 40-percent drop for each 16-point rise, according to the survey by the universities of Aberdeen, Bristol, Edinburgh and Glasgow.

It does not consider that the women who are more intelligent may not WANT to get married, are self sufficient and do not NEED to get married. The writer of the article drew the conclusion:

A high IQ is a hindrance for women wanting to get married while it is an asset for men, according to a study by four British universities published in The Sunday Times newspaper.

The two people they quoted were speculating on reasons for the statistics. This was a correlation study, not a causation study. I told the statisticians I work with about this study (all of whom are women with very high IQs who are married!) and they laughed at the conclusion drawn by the yahoo article.

Dee

[James]

A high IQ can be a hinderance for a man as well. Again I think it comes down to who adept his social skills are . . . if he has a habit of speaking pendantically and "talking over the head" of his listener, he is likely to intimidate.