How long should you be "talking?"

[WVU alpha phi]

OK here's my scenario and I'm pretty much clueless as to what this guy (I'll call him John) is thinking.

I met John back in the fall when he took me to his date party randomly - he just asked me at a bar one night after seeing me up at his house during fraternity rush. I went to his date party and had an awesome time, but I had a boyfriend at the time so nothing really came of it. We traded calls fall semester for awhile like "what are you up to tonight?" type calls but never really hung out again except when I'd run into him out at night.
This semester I'm single and we started hanging out my first week back at school. We hooked up (only made out) one night and he spent the night, and since then we've been hanging out all the time. He always says he likes me but I get mixed signals from him. He took me out to dinner once and I think that was only because I made a comment about how we never hang out in public or anything. We sleep at eachother's places all the time and we've established that we're "talking."
This past weekend he took me to another one of his date parties, and while we were there I drunkenly told him I wanted to be with him, which I definitely do. He said he really liked me but didn't want to force anything and he doesn't want a girlfriend, so we left it at that for the night.
Then last night I was all tired and kinda picked a fight about it. I told him I felt like he was saying I wasn't good enough to be his girlfriend. He always says how much he likes me, and if you like someone, why wouldn't you want to be with them? He said we don't need any labels and why couldn't I just be happy with hanging out and hooking up and knowing we both like eachother? I said I didn't want to waste my time if he wasn't looking for a girlfriend and I wasn't sure if we should keep hanging out, and he got really pissed. We ultimately just left it as we'd take things day by day, which I'm not 100% happy with but whatever. This morning he was like, "Please don't ever pull that again, don't be gay about things with us, I like you and don't want to lose you." THEN he told me that at his date party, he knew he wanted to be with me, but he didn't want to say anything while we were drunk. And he said I pushed our relationship back with that talk and now he isn't so sure.
Did I blow my chances and make him think I'm psycho?? How do I play my cards from here on out? I like him a lot but is he just stringing me along?

Sorry this post is so long.. I always get myself into complicated situations!