Looking to make an example out of us

[bubblegum]

I'm so stressed out and worried. Here's the whole deal:

There is a new fraternity (I'll call them ABC) on our campus and they are not yet recognized by the Multi-Cultural Greek Council (which my sorority is in). A lot of my girls are friends with the guys in ABC and we've done socials and parties with them, even though we're really not supposed to...since they're not recognized. Things have been pretty lax in our council and many of the orgs have bent the rules or broken the rules. However, right now, the council is dominated by our rival sorority and the ABC's rival fraternity.

We were supposed to have a party with ABC at a club downtown. Somehow, the Greek Life Office got wind of it and I got called into the office. The advisor to the Multi-Cultural Greek Coucil (he's new...the council just got an advisor this year) basically said to me "It has been brought to my attention that you're having a party with an unrecognized organization. According to the council rules, you're not allowed to have any events or activities with unrecognized organizations. There can be increased liability for you and the university. You're giving credibility to this unrecognized group. It'll discourage organizations from petitioning to be recognized. It harms the other organizations in the council when you have events with an unrecognized organization rather than an organization in your council." He went on to say that he knows about how lax things had been in the past and orgs break rules without being called before judicial, but that since he's the advisor now, things are going to change. And then he said that he doesn't want to see our chapter get kicked off campus and that I really needed to "do the right thing". At the end of my meeting, he said that he was only doing this to "look out for your chapter's best interest" because of liability.

Now, I know liability is a serious matter and I understand wanting to encourage recognized orgs to do events with the orgs in their council, but I just got the feeling that he was being really insincere. I didn't feel at all like he was doing this to keep us out of trouble. I felt like I was being implicitly threatened. I felt as if he was implying that if I didn't do what he wanted, he was going to make an example out of my sorority.

So I ended up calling ABC and telling them we were backing out of the party. We weren't going to pass out party flyers anymore. We weren't going to profit from the party. We weren't going to get into the party for free anymore. We weren't going to wear letters to the party. We weren't going to bring our rush flyers to the party. We weren't going to try to rush girls at the party. We were going to go simply as regular patrons. We weren't making sisters go, but a lot of the sisters felt bad about backing out on ABC so last minute and wanted to at least go to the party so ABC could make more money.

After I talked to ABC, I went back to the advisor and told him all of this. He said it was ok. The only thing he expressed concern about was that it might still be viewed as a joint party. In his words, "There's just one thing. If it walks like a duck and it quacks like a duck...." I reiterated that we had completely backed out of the party and that if girls decided to go to the party, it would be as individuals and as paying customers. He didn't say anything else. He just wished me luck with my semester and my classes before I left, so I thought everything was cool. BTW, all of this occurred before the party actually took place. So, I had the whole thing resolved before the party took place...or so I thought.

Someone of the Multi-Cultural Greek Council's executive board just told me that they're going to call me before judicial next week. I'm really scared for my chapter. Yeah, we were in the wrong for setting up a party with an unrecognized org, but after I was called in to see the advisor, I went and got us out of co-sponsoring the party. I let the advisor know what I did. I got the impression that this was an acceptable solution, since he didn't say that we had to do more than that. I feel really frustrated. I feel like the fraternity and sorority that dominate Multi-Cultural Greek Council are out to get us. I'm actually pretty sure of who it is that ratted us out to the advisor. They've actually tried to mess with us before. They caused all sorts of drama last semester by calling one of our pledges and pretending to be one of us and cursing out that pledge. They caused drama for us the semester before by sending us an anonymous email claiming to be one of our pledges and threatening to go to the Office of Greek Life and telling all these outrageous lies (like that we force them to drink, even the ones that are underage and even the ones that don't drink alcohol). I really don't know what to do. I wish I could get even with them, but I know that's not the solution. And on top of that, we've always prided ourselves on being the classier sorority and always taking the high road and refusing to stoop to their level. I'm sorry this is such a long post. I just need to vent. And if anyone has any advice, that'd be appreciated.

[kddani]

Well, first and foremost, you know that your GLO did something wrong, that it was a violation of the rules.

That particular rule isn't the smartest to break. I'm guessing there were probably some other rules and guidelines you were breaking, since your group was going to profit off the party (i'm also assuming that you're a local, or at least non-NPC, because NPC guidelines are very strict that you couldn't do something like this. If you're NPC you're lucky you didn't get it more trouble).

I don't know if your group has an insurance policy (it should), b/c this event would've probably been a huge no-no under that policy too.

I'm sorry that you're having such a hard time dealing with all of this. Does your group have a faculty and/or alumna advisor that you can talk to?

It's hard to tell you what to do without knowing about the structure of your group and the campus.

Good luck, but please remember why you're in this position, and try to stay within the lines in the future.

[bubblegum]

Let me clarify. We're a non-NPC sorority. We have insurance with our nationals. And under our national rules, we're only allowed to have parties open to other people at places that have a liquor licence and their own insurance policy too (i.e. bars and clubs). That part isn't a problem with our council at all. In fact, our university as a whole is trying to get more orgs to go the third party vendor route, since it's less liability than frat parties. There's bouncers checking ID's. There's bartenders and bouncers making sure that people who are drunk aren't served more alcohol and that those under 21 aren't getting served alcohol. As far as the profit thing, there's nothing in our national rules or in our council rules against it. That part isn't a problem at all.

[texas*princess]

I think liability is often a gray area.... and that is probably why the advisor is concerned.

Also - do other groups in your council have these parties? It sounds like the parties at clubs used as "fundraisers" are pretty big crazy things. There was an NPHC group on my first campus that would have these parties all the time, and while they were lots of fun, sometimes bad stuff happened (like a fight broke out or something). Maybe your advisor is concerned about that liability. The group that had those parties before, actually stopped when we got a new greek advisor. I don't know the details, but one would assume that liability was at least a little part of it.

[PsychTau2]

My advice (from a campus advisor that has underground groups present): If you actually are called in front of judicial, explain to them everything that happened (including the fact that the advisor warned you about this party and that you attempted to back out, etc. Be honest in saying that some sisters went, but they would have to come in to say why). Accept the consequences, and learn the lesson.

Your advisor was correct in stating that it increases liability for you and everyone else if you mix with an unrecognized group. It also gives their organization credibility to exist as an organization, and undermines the authority of your governing council. That creates a situation where you have a group that exists for the sole purpose to party (often in an unsafe manner), but that doesn't have to live up to any of the standards the rest of the Greek community strives for on your campus. THAT situation then begins to undermine your own organization's credibility, and starts eroding the Greek system as a whole (i.e. "What is the benefit of joining that recognized organization? They'll make me work..."). It is a slippery slope.

Depending on what the judicial board charges you with (and your school's judicial procedures), you could suggest consequences like community service or creating an educational presentation about underground organizations to all Greeks. Admitting the mistake without being defensive would help you to avoid unrealistic consequences. And if you do feel the consequences are too harsh (such as a 1 year suspension), I would consider appealing (which would give you the opportunity to offer the community service or presentation).

Aside from that, I would familiarize myself with the judicial procedure so you understand what you are facing.

Keep us posted on what happens!!
PsychTau

[bubblegum]

To further clarify, the only thing that they're having a problem with was that we were planning to have a party with an unrecognized org. A few days later, I went to the advisor to get clarification on the policy. I was asking if it was only for open events or if the policy also applied to closed event with low liability (like playing board games with just the sisters and the brothers, no alcohol, no outside people). Since liability wouldn't really be an issue in the second scenerio, the advisor couldn't say that was the problem. Instead, he just kept saying how we would be giving credibility to this fraternity. The only reason we're trying to do something with them is because they can't get into the council without certain requirements. They're required to show that they have social functions with other groups, that they have academic/cultural workshops for the university, that they have community service, etc. It just seems really contradictory for the council to require that they have social functions but then prevent us from having social functions with them.

One of my sisters had been VP of the council last year and at that time, the policy was interpreted as sororities and fraternities are allowed to have events with unrecognized orgs as long as it's not advertised as such (i.e. orgs don't put their letters on party flyers if there is an unrecognized group). I don't have a copy of the policy but it's worded very vague.

I actually think that this sister may be one of the reasons they're pursuing us. Something happened last year and she quit. She won't tell us what happened though. But because of whatever happened, she won't even go into the Greek Life office because she doesn't want to see that advisor at all. So, whatever happened involved this advisor too. But I can't get her to tell me what happened. And since she got really angry when I asked, I just dropped the issue.

[DeltAlum]

Originally posted by bubblegum
Let me clarify. We're a non-NPC sorority. We have insurance with our nationals.

That's good. Does the new fraternity also have adequate liability insurance? Or, if there had been an incident, would you and the third party vendor be left holding the proverbial bag? Remember that in today's legal climate, just about everyone involved gets sued.

On the other hand, if you really did manage to sever all of the ties with "ABC" regarding this event -- and your members went as individuals, I'm not sure anyone has any power to censure you for it as a group.

However, I agree with the others -- your group made a mistake getting involved to the depth that you did.

[bubblegum]

The fraternity also has insurance, as part of their nationals.

[PsychTau2]

Originally posted by bubblegum
The only reason we're trying to do something with them is because they can't get into the council without certain requirements. They're required to show that they have social functions with other groups, that they have academic/cultural workshops for the university, that they have community service, etc. It just seems really contradictory for the council to require that they have social functions but then prevent us from having social functions with them.

Once the judicial issue has passed, I would look at changing that part of the policy (depending on how it's worded). From what you've said, it sounds like the council bylaws are contradicting themselves. This basically allows groups to host functions under the premise that they are trying to get recognized by the council, but all they may wind up doing is having the socials (and not completing the rest of the recognition process). You've created a no win situation there.

If your council wants these groups to show that they will be productive, participating members of the community, they could look at a probationary period of recognition, in which the new group would have to complete the above tasks in a certain time frame, or show that it's required in their bylaws, or something similar.

Hopefully your coucil advisor is working to get things going on the right track.

PsychTau

[AOIIBrandi]

If both groups are national (yours and the unrecognized group) I would suggest getting on the phone with national offices and/or advisors ASAP. I would not go into a judicial meeting without some sort of representation.

Also, is it possible that this advisor did something unthinkable to your sister? If so, she needs counseling and the administration at the school needs to know so it does not happen to someone else. At the least it sounds like he embarrassed her in some way if not harrassed or took it further than that. Something happened.

[bubblegum]

I don't think the advisor did something to this sister. My guess is that there was some sort of disagreement where everyone, including the advisor, felt one way about something and she was the only one who opposed it. And maybe they tried to pressure her to change her decision. They reason I think this is because I know that whatever bothered her enough to quit was something that between her and the other council members and the advisor. If this is the case, I think the reason she's so mad at the advisor, more so than at the other council members, is because she felt that he shouldn't have bias. In addition, all the chapters are assigned to one of the advisors in the Greek Life office and we happen to be assigned to this same advisor. I think this sister also felt like the advisor should be trying to help us and be on our side but he's not.

[Tom Earp]

I keep rereading this and am trying to understand "Just What Is The Agenda of The Greek Advisor"?

Just What are supposed to be THE RULES?

It sounds like You as a Group did nothing wrong except in one persons mind. The Advisor.

While I like the Greek Life Advisor of My Old University, I would Love To Be Hired to replace Her. Get it on track and growing.

6 Fraternitys and 3 Sororitys! Lowest in our Conference!

[PhoenixAzul]

I dunno, this kinda irks me. I would be really bothered if the school or panhel tried to tell my org that we couldn't have a mixer or some sort of social with say...African American Student Union or FreeZone (GLBT group) or that we couldn't go, say to OSU and mix with one of their nationals or locals (which other sororities have done on my campus). Meh.

I'd say talk to your national officers and see what they say.

[TSteven]

Originally posted by AOIIBrandi
If both groups are national (yours and the unrecognized group) I would suggest getting on the phone with national offices and/or advisors ASAP. I would not go into a judicial meeting without some sort of representation.

Big co-sign with AOIIBrandi.

For what it is worth, I would not come into the meeting defensive but take the offensive with this issue.

Have a prepared statement to read before the executive board - if you indeed go before them - outlining what happened and what your chapter did to correct it.

Be sure to point out that you met with the advisor and followed the appropriate actions to correct the matter - as it was discussed. You can emphasize that not only did your chapter correct the situation, but it was under the guidance of the advisor.

And if need be and allowed, another option might be to send an open letter to your campus newspaper explaining your chapter's situation.

As others said, there may be sanctions imposed on your chapter. If they are 'fair' then own up to it and move on. If not, then appeal to the council and or any other appropriate group.

Best of luck.

[33girl]

If this other group is recognized as a chapter by their nationals and therefore has liability protection, I don't think risk mgmt is a problem. It sounds more like the council is trying to screw this group over and wants to punish anyone who doesn't share that mindset. They are using liability and risk mgmt as excuses when actually the reason is "we don't like this new fraternity and we want them to fail."

I also agree with Brandi's post. You guys both need to get your nationals involved.