The guy comes back, the very next day

UKDaisy · #1 09-13-2004, 10:18 PM

My best friend has had some interesting boy problems for a few years now.

She lived across from this guy in a huge apt complex for a year. She also had 3 classes with him both semesters. Well, the two flirted in and out. And it became one of those great college crushes to have.

Then he moved. But they had 1 class together both semesters. Then during the summer they started working together at the same restaurant. They worked there for two years.

Every Thursday night while we would get ready to go out we'd hear this one particular song, we called it the "boy song". When we'd hear it - she would see him.

One day while she was waiting tables his mom was in and the mom knew who my friend was!!!!!

So its been almost 6 months since she has really had a chance to talk to him and such. He moved to Florida - she's in Nashville. Well, she was in this weekend and we heard the song and guess what?????? SHE SAW HIM!!!!!! A total of 3 times this weekend alone! He is back home for a while.

My question is - should she go after this guy? B/c all of us totally think so. But she is kinda scared too...... I need advice to give her. Is this just strange or should I push for her to be like all up on it?

James · #2 09-13-2004, 10:22 PM

Absolutely not, if he is only around for the 3.5 minute duration of a pop song he is even worse than I am damnit.

hotpie · #3 09-13-2004, 10:55 PM

you will never know unless you try... there is definately something weird about that situation. i would be kicking myself if i let it pass by, never to know what the results could be if i at least attempted to get something going.

since they obviously don't live near eachother, they really couldn't start much. but she could at least talk to him and ask how he feels about it.

she may be scared to do so, but most guys like outgoing girls and vice versa. he'll give a good answer and you will have crossed a boundery...

IowaStatePhiPsi · #4 09-14-2004, 08:59 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by James
Absolutely not, if he is only around for the 3.5 minute duration of a pop song he is even worse than I am damnit.

pure gold material there.

XOMichelle · #5 09-14-2004, 04:23 PM

I mean, he lives far away, but why not? She might as well go for it!

valkyrie · #6 09-14-2004, 04:26 PM

I don't know that I'd really encourage her -- yes it's odd that a certain song plays and they see each other, but it doesn't sound like they've really spent much time together or that he's expressed any real interest. It certainly wouldn't hurt for her to go for it, but she shouldn't expect much.

jharb · #7 09-14-2004, 04:28 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by IowaStatePhiPsi
pure gold material there.

You're really special.

PennyCarter · #8 09-14-2004, 10:01 PM

The worst thing ever is what if. I say go for it...its not always easy to approach a guy, but you never know. There was a guy I used to have a crush on (we only met once) but we wrote real letters then emails and talked on the phone...all random. We had so many random coincidences. I always wondered what if, but never did anything about it. Then I used to say if I didn't have a boyfriend I'd try to see...just because we have kept in touch for 5 years (not all the time, but randome emails) based on one meeting. But recently I emailed him and found out that he got married!!! No worries...I'm sure that was what was meant to be, but it would have been fun to have tried! There's no harm in it!

Optimist Prime · #9 09-15-2004, 03:07 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by James
Absolutely not, if he is only around for the 3.5 minute duration of a pop song he is even worse than I am damnit.

ba-ZING

TigerLilly · #10 09-15-2004, 11:00 PM

Hey! UKDaisy! Clean out your PM box please!

UKDaisy · #11 09-16-2004, 01:11 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by TigerLilly
Hey! UKDaisy! Clean out your PM box please!

Sorry!!! I cleaned it out!

sororitygirl2 · #12 09-25-2004, 04:03 PM

I'm sure the song thing is nothing more than a coincidence. But what is most telling is that she is reading into it and wanting it to be a "sign" that means much more. So, obviously, she is interested. She should put herself on the line, pursue getting to know him better and see where it goes.

hannahgirl · #13 09-26-2004, 12:06 AM

I agree with Penny. I don't like the "what if" factor in past relationships. I am the queen of letting opportunities pass me by and sometimes I just want to yell at myself for not telling someone how I feel.

I let that happen tonight. A guy that I used to date on and off for 3 years called last night saying that he was in town. (He currently lives in RI). First of all, its been almost a year since I saw him last and about 6 months since I talked to him on the phone so its not like it was a normal thing to get a phone call from him. He came over tonight (go figure I'd been sick all day so I was really feeling like crap) and hung out for an hour or so. There were so many chances to ask him questions that I just needed answered but I didn't have the courage to do it. The last time I did that, he broke my heart. So it was just something I didn't want to experience again.

If your friend has hard-core feelings for this guy, I'd say that she keeps in contact with him and see what happens. I know with "B", that I could genuinely spend the rest of my life with him, but thats where the "what-ifs" come into play because its something that we never talk about. Its hard that we're so far away and also that I'm currently seeing someone else, but you never know what happens when two people have feelings for each other.