In this thread, I need blind reassurance about my boy

[PureGoldF2K1]

I need people to tell me that a lot of guys just dont like to talk on the phone and that having those phone conversations that last for hours arent an intergral part of a relationship. I don't even like the phone that much, but it just seems like if he really liked me, he would talk for longer (granted HE calls ME everyday, but its always for like 5 minutes and if its longer, its because he's talking to other people while he's talking to me...but he wouldnt call everyday if he didnt like me right??)

OK, so let the reassurance start!! Unless, you happen to think I'm just convincing myself....


oh yeah, we're not in the same town for the summer, so thats why im worried about the phone at all...

[azdtaxi]

i hate the phone and rarely talk on it ... if i am talking to a friend from far away i will talk to them every few weeks for an hour or so just so its not overkill

some people just hate the phone no matter how far away they are from a person - but he still is calling you everyday good sign

GOOD LUCK

[PureGoldF2K1]

Can I also add that he's only 19? I'm 21...thats not a huge difference but am I forgetting how guys going into their sophomore year differ from those going into their senior or older?? Or do they not differ? hehe

[thermobryan]

Ok, this is totally normal. I honestly CANT STAND talking on the phone, I hate it so much! It's not just him, its just being a guy. It's like if you want to talk, then just go over to his place. Relax, he's just a guy.

[BabyP]

write letters. its much better

[aphibeach]

i hate talking on the phone unless it's one of my girlfriends or one of my fabulously gay friends. the guy i'm seeing will call me like once a week or so. i like my independence and the moment the boy gets crazy and starts dialing my number 3 times a day, i quit answering and walk away

guys dont like talking on the phone.......i would bore him if i told him everything that i told my girlfriends. i wouldn't worry that much.

[winneythepooh7]

Most guys I've dated hate the phone. They want to get to the point and that's that. I think it is a guy thing

[DGqueen17]

I understand that guys hate talking on the phone.

BUT if you are away from each other and you have no other way to converse.......what else are you suppose to do??

[winneythepooh7]

I hate to say this but since you are away from each other for the summer, who knows if he has another person at home? I remember most of the guys I knew in college had girlfriends at home and would hook up like it was going out of style while "away" at school. He is also only 19 too. Sorry if that sounds mean, that's not my intention.

[norcalchick]

i'm a girl and i hate talking on the phone. maybe he's not doing that much so he doesn't have much to talk about?

[aurora_borealis]

Originally posted by DGqueen17
I understand that guys hate talking on the phone.

BUT if you are away from each other and you have no other way to converse.......what else are you suppose to do??

Lob eggs at Bancroft Hall...:P

Various messaging system (AOL, yahoo! MSN etc), and email work pretty well. I am a big fan of care packages and letters. KR gave me fabulous ideas last fall.

My friends never call me as I never answer the phone. I have had the number since April and calls are never for me. My old phone number was 885-BOOB and all kinds of boys called it all the time The ex/current boy sometimes calls, but will never leave a message, but he just knocks on the door since his building is next to mine.

[cash78mere]

my boyfriend and i like to talk on the phone when he's home.

but he's in california for the month on business while i'm stuck in NY. he calls me once in the morning and once at night because it's the only way we can communicate now. so i'd be worried if he only wanted to talk for 5 minutes.

i think you need to talk to this guy. it also depends on how long you've been together.

[kateshort]

My husband was just like this.

In school, he lived in Chicagoland and I lived in Maryland in the DC burbs, and the phone calls sucked. It was like pulling teeth. And he only called maybe once every two weeks (I'd usually call him once a week). Much later on I realized that he just hated the phone. He still has me do all of the phone calls that are necessary. Nowadays he can chat with me or my parents, but that's because we've been married for six years, dating for another eight on top of that!

Letters were something else entirely. He can take all day to write an email-- he doesn't feel the pressure to keep me entertained. Letters also allowed him to talk about what had happened the past week-- much easier to do if you're having a boring summer, where the best thing you did all day was read a magazine article on the john after coming home from work! His letters were two or three pages long, handwritten, and though not romantic were very nice.

So try letters! I'd be so bored if I was talking to "me" every day, because all I'm doing during the summer is hanging out on GreekChat, watching TV, and reading lots of books that my husband couldn't care less about. Not more than 5 minutes of conversation there, tops!

[PureGoldF2K1]

No, he's not my boyfriend, that what made it so complicated. I was in a serious relationship last summer, and if HE hadnt talked to me, then I would have been pissed!!!
And I don't think he's got another girl at all, just because I've been to dinner with his family and he took me to the lake with his family and extended family this summer...usually guys dont parade their college flings in front of their families when the family knows theres a girlfriend.

I'm trying not to stress, but i have nothing else to worry about at the moment, so of course i'm acting like a typical girl.

[James]

The more someone likes you the more they want to talk to you, especially if they are denied close contact because you are far away from them. Its just a matter of how much you are on their mind.