Friday's joke from Delta-Kappa-Al-Najar
US Troops forced to smile for Iraqi Prisoners
Written by Paul Bavill
Senators in the US left Committee Rooms shocked today, after they had been shown over 1800 photos and video clips of Coalition troops being forced to smile in front of naked Iraqi prisoners.
Soldiers A, B and C have come forward to reveal that captured Iraqi insurgents wandered freely around Abu Ghraib prison, discarding clothing and engaging in mass male-bonding pile-ons, and during these rituals US troops were forced to smile, laugh and give the thumbs up to this apparent Baghdad frat-house party.
One soldier, PFC Anna Karpowski, was forced to climb on and simulate sex for one “Delta-Kappa-Al-Najar” initiate.
Giving evidence to the Special Select Committee, General Dwight Rickenbakker, has stated, “These soldiers are doing a first rate job and were only obeying orders. I have no doubts that the order to smile at Iraqi’s has come from all the way up in the CIA and the Pentagon.”
In response a spokesman for the CIA had the following to say. “No such order would have ever been given, and we would like to reinforce the fact that nobody in the US has a sense of humour when it comes to the Middle East. We are there for the oil not the fun. This is obviously the work of a few bad apples, fermented into a very strong drink.”
The soldiers are expected to receive a dishonourable discharge and a column in MAD magazine.
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The story as represented above is written as a satire or parody. It is fictitious.
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