Getting too old

[azdtaxi]

Have yall ever felt like you were outgrowing your chapter? I have only been in for two years but will soon be a fifth year senior. A lot of the girls seem to have problems with the fact that I have friends outside of the sorority. I love AZD but really feel like I am getting to old (i am 22) what do you think?

I think a lot of girls go through what you're feeling now, including myself.

I took alumna status early at 22 as I became a 5th year senior. By that time, most of the sisters that I was very close to were already alumnae and no longer in the chapter. I had one pledge sister left, but I felt like I didn't have a lot in common with my younger, 18/19 year old sisters.

After a while I wouldn't hang out with my sisters as much and I'd see them only at chapter and the mandatory events. I wasn't mad at them and to this day I still care for them, it's just that after a while you develop other interests and you prefer hanging out with friends outside the sorority.

[CASIGKAP]

I wonder what that says about me. I am 25 years old and still an active member b/c I did not join until I was 23. I felt that I was way too old for sorority but it turns out that age really is just a number. I feel completely at home with the ladies of my house and my age has never been a factor.

I also guess it depends on how long you have been active. I have one year left of school so I'm going to get as much out of this experience as I possible can. You only get one chance to do this. I joined so late b/c despite the fact that I was "old" by sorority standards, I did not want to go through life wondering what could have been. I don't regret my decision and I love spending time with my gals. I am the older experienced sister who can dispense common sense advise since I long left the whole hardcore partying scene and can now concentrate on just having fun!!!

[ASTLuv21]

I really think it all depends with the person. The president of my chapter is 25 and my chapter is very young. Most of us range from 19-21. My chapter is only 2 years old also. What I see in my chapter is that the older sisters, including my president, tend to all hang out together while the younger ones do. But also I will add this in, the older sisters will invite you to the bar when you turn 21 (its hard to get the sisters who are under 21 into the bar because many bars and clubs around here are 21+...very few college nights of 18+ and those usually are on school nights which aren't good nights seeing that many of my sisters are 12 credits or more or they work those nights).

I'm 21 and I know I will be in the sorority for over 4 yrs. I won't be graduating until sometime in 2008 (was to graduate in 2006) due to me switching my major. AST is in the process of approving a amendment for going alum early not sure that I will take it when it comes down to me being older...its all gonna depend on where I am with my major (I'm a Nursing Major).

[Adelphean1851]

I think these are pretty common sentiments, I remember my diamond sis telling me how she was ready to move on her last year, and even though I feel I missed out a little when I had to take early alum status I know that now at 23 the antics of 18 and 19 year olds would prolly drive me batty. But I still love my sorority and I am a really active alum. I know I can't go back so I press forward.

[ambición6]

...

[ASTLuv21]

Totally agree. Another example is my bf's fraternity. The youngest in their fraternity is 20 and the oldest is 28. Everyone of them are active in the Fraternity. Granted they are tiny...only 9 of them but I never saw a group of great guys...well minus a few sour ones but I still like em! LOL! I never heard any of these guys once say they were done and ready to go alum, espcially from the one who's 28.

[Dionysus]

Not really. I'm sad that I have to go alum in 1/05 if I don't get into grad school. I think the average age in my chapter is 20/21 and I'm almost 23. There's one my age and two who are 24. I'm currently not that close to anyone, but I have a blast whenever I do hang out with them. Of course this is coming from someone who didn't start partying and stuff until 19, took a break when I was 20, and started back up when I was almost 22. Maybe that's a factor.

[Munchkin03]

There's always a time to leave the party.

Maybe you just know when it's time for you to leave. It doesn't make you any less of a sister--you're just ready to pursue the next chapter of your life.

[PhiPsiRuss]

I see two issues here. One is that your sisters need to get over your friends outside the house. That should actually be encouraged, as it helps with recruitment.

The other is that this isn't really about age, but about a GLO no longer challenging the member. Its often called, "senior burnout," and its something that many national GLOs have been addressing for sometime. If your chapter doesn't have comprehensive programming in place to address the needs of specific members, I would ask the proper person in your chapter to contact your HQ to set that up.

[CASIGKAP]

I'm probably still in the honeymoon stage!

I know that some of the senior girls that are ready to go alumn are excited it's finally here for them b/c they've given so much to our sorority, it's time for them to move on.

Me on the other hand, am still experiencing all the joys of it like a 19 year old would. I do have to say that even though I am the oldest, I am not the most mature girl there. There are younger girls than me who are the serious type while I am just plain weird. I like to have fun and take things one day at a time. The girls that are closest in age to me are 22 and 23 so I don't feel that bad.

I just don't like it when I'm mistaken for alumn when I tell people my age. 25 is not old when you have a heart like me!

[Tom Earp]

Russ, hit the nail on the head!

You are in a transition period as we all have at one time. I did not have time being the Founder, but being only 2 years of Collegete experience when I graduated, I stayed very close.

After a period of time expired, I did not go back as much and then not at all. Missed a whole lot of New Brothers who I did not ever know.

I eventually got back involved and met many of these young Brothers and was sad for what I missed.

Senior burnout is not the only time that one has to lay back off but even as an Alum it happens.

I am at that point right now as have been hard driving again for 15 years and am tired.

You will once again get rejuvinated at some point in time and find you really missed it.

Just stay in touch so you do not get lost as many have!


Friends outside the Chapter, god I hope so! Every person you meet adds more to your knowledge of people and how they act and react!


If it were not for people I met and knew when I stated the local, the local would not have been there and progressed for 40 years.

[azdtaxi]

Wow thanks for all the response. I think I am just way to burned out. I was that memebr that did everything all the time and now I just don't see myself as a necessity in the chapter anymore. I think the chapter would do better without me kinda of ... that was a weird way to say it. I don't know I think i am just tired.

[adpiucf]

I think all seniors experience this at some point. You're maturing, and you're spending more time doing career-related things, while the younger members enjoy more free time and silliness. It's not an element you want to be around 24/7.

Talk to your Membership VP about having some activities that are targeted to the older members. Maybe a workshop on resume writing and networking, or a seniors-only social event. Ask for more sisters-only events. Don't feel like you have to go to every mixer and intramural game. Do go to the weekly meetings and service projects, and enjoy the time there. Go to the non-mandatories you will enjoy-- if nightclubbing is no longer your bag, but pottery throwing is, then go to what interests you. It's ok to feel a little distanced from the chapter. It's part of growing up. If there is an alumnae association in the area, ask that the chapter coordinate some events with them. It will be great to get to know the alum and experience life on the other side-- when you're working a full time job, or you're married, a mom, or all 3! Alum life is less hectic than collegiate life, as there are less requirements, and the events tend to be spread out to appeal to various interests and age groups.

Enjoy this last year of college, and try not to skip too much sorority stuff. You've paid your dues, and you've come this far. Smile, turn a friendly face. Encourage your other seniors to come out. Maybe offer to plan a philanthropy event as your last "hurrah" in the chapter. Make it great.

[AchtungBaby80]

You're not too old. But as others have said, try to enjoy the time you have left as an active. You might be like my sisters, who could not wait to go alum. Or you could be like me, I miss being active because I'm not involved with the alum chapter and most of my friends from outside the sorority are married and boring. *sniff*