Should I do anything else?

[DeltaSigStan]

I normally don't ask for advice in these situations, but I'm confronted with a time constraint.

My mom had made reservations for Champagne brunch on last Sunday, and my Godparents, who I hadn't seen in 13 years, were also going to be there for a party of four, to celebrate my 21st b-day.

Well, we arrive at 12:25 for 12:30 reservations. We are told it will be another 15 minutes. SO we wait. In the meantime, numerous tables of five and six were constantly being called ahead of us.

By 1:15 Pm, my mom was pretty pissed, and all the hostesses would say is that "we were next", then would call other parties. Well, three parties later, and my Godfather went up to the hostesses, and they totally blew us all off. So my mother and G-parents made somewhat of a scene and left. I didn;t feel like continuing with the meal, so I went home in disgust.

There was no reason for us to be ignored and disrespected like that (and I don't wanna think what I'm thinking even though there can be no other explaination). My mother called the restaurant a couple hours later, and the manager even ADMITTED their conduct was wrong, but all my mom did was tell him that her work (who hold a big luncheon there every year) would not be doing business with them again and hung up.

I honestly don't think we were compensated for what we went through. That was my favorite place to eat (we go there on Mother's day, Easter, etc), and I was celebrating my most important b-day in a while with family I hadn't seen in years. And they're very lucky I didn't deal with the way I wanted to when we were there, cause I don't wanna go to jail.

So, tommorow will be Tuesday. Should I myself be able to call the restaurant and try to get something further out of this? This isn't the first altercation we've had with the restaurant (last yr, a waitress made us stay there an extra hour to clear a wrongdoing with the check). I wanna explain to them things my mom didn't that they need to be aware of because of their disrespect, but on the other hand, is this one of those cases of tough shit and just move on?

BTW, though this is all 100% serious, I'd like to make the point that I'm running on 3 40s of Mickey's.

[Kevin]

Maybe stop going there? I don't know.. if a business establishment treated me like that more than once, I'd just not go there. Perhaps write a letter to the manager/owner?

Other than that, I'd say that you have nothing to gain from pursuing this (unless you're trying to get a complimentary meal or something).

[DeltaSigStan]

Not to sound like a cheap low life, but yes, I am mainly trying to get a free meal out of this, because it would mean a meal on their own dime for their own rude behavior.

[FiReKraCkEr]

Is this a corporate restaurant? If they have a website, you could make a complaint there. They take online complaints seriously, especially if you give them names and facts. If you talk to the corporate manager about what happened, I know for a fact you will probably get a gift certificate in the mail. When I worked at Chilis, that's how the managers dealt with complaints.

[DeltaSigStan]

It's the 94th Aero Squadron, not a chain, but basically as elegant as a buffet is gonna get.

[justamom]

DSS, are you saying that you believe they acted this way as a form of prejudism???
There was no reason for us to be ignored and disrespected like that (and I don't wanna think what I'm thinking even though there can be no other explaination).
That's why I ask.

Good grief! If you believe that is the reason, I would be so totally ticked off I would have considered making a scene too.

Since it's not corporate, then I don't know what you can do that would bring "justice" to the situation. If you confronted management, they might offer a meal but I wouldn't want to eat there EVER again. The loss of business is what will open their eyes. Your Mother's pull on that is a more powerful statement than them comping a dinner or two and being able to write it off.

If they take reservations without a credit card, you could play with them on and off for a while.

ktsnake-Maybe stop going there? I don't know.. if a business establishment treated me like that more than once, I'd just not go there. Perhaps write a letter to the manager/owner?

Other than that, I'd say that you have nothing to gain from pursuing this (unless you're trying to get a complimentary meal or something). Have to agree.

[DeltAlum]

Actually, 94th Aero Squadron is a small national chain. There is/or at least was/one at the Columbus, Ohio airport, and, I've been in at least one other.

But, I agree with JAM, but would take it a step farther. If you believe you were the victim of some sort of prejudice, you could file charges. I'm not suggesting that because it could turn into a real pain in the rear, though. But if there is proof, the option is there.

Otherwise, I think you have little or nothing to gain. I simply wouldn't go back there again. Are you ready to sell out your principles for a free meal?

I would definitely write a letter to the manager of the restaurant and cc a copy to their corporate office (preferably an HR person, a sales person, something like that. Presidents often don't have the time to read this type of correspondence, so they give it to their secretary, and it ends up in a black hole).

If possible, list the location, names of servers/hostess that were disrespectful, exact times, date, etc. The more specific information the better. Inform them that the experience(s) have soured you on the restaurant, that you will be informing anyone who asks of the disrespectful service.

The difficult part of a complaint letter is getting the point across without making empty threats or being obnxious (ie. "I'll make sure no one ever eats here again and your restaurant goes out of business!" is just going to get you laughed at and ignored). Good luck... if you want to post a draft of your letter here, I'm sure there are a few of us who would be willing to help you with it!

[DeltaSigStan]

You guys are awesome. The problem with the whole prejudice thing is that I really can't prove it. Aside from the fact that party after party (of caucasians) were getting called ahead of us isn't gonna do it; they didn't use any racial slurs or epithets, I can only go on the fact that there was no other reason to disrespect us like that.

But, I am going to write a very specific and professional e-mail. Thanks for the support.

[Jill1228]

Definitely raise holy hell with anyone who is higher up! I had to do that with the Mirage hotel in Vegas a couple of years ago. Honey, I am still fuming about that!

And trust me, they don't have to use racial slurs to prove that they have some race issues...TRUST ME! If I told you about my Mirage champagne brunch experience (and yes I got a letter of apology), you would definitely know that someone was trippin!

[DeltaSigStan]

Here's what I sent:

To Whom It May Concern,

My name is Stan Mangindin, and I would like to make you aware of an incident my family and I experienced at your restaurant, and how your hostess' rude behavior was completely disrespectful.

On Saturday, December 20, 2003, my mother, Lourdes Mangindin, had made reservations for four for the next day. She reserved a time of 12:30 PM, and our party of four, including my mother, myself, and my Godparents (whom I hadn't seen in 13 years) arrived well in advance of that time. We were celebrating my 21st birthday at what I considered my favorite restaurant, and I was particularly looking foward to finally being able to sample the fine champagne you offer with your delicious cuisine.

However, upon our arrival, we were told it was going to be another 15-to-20 minute wait, which we kindly obliged. Though as time past, it became increasingly obvious that we were being skipped over, and that parties our size that had arrived there later were being seated ahead of us.

My mother approached one of your hostesses, a very attractive brunette wearing a light blue dress and black jacket, and complained. Because of her frustaration with numerous parties arriving at the time, we again gave her the benefit of the doubt when she responded that "there would be another 15 minute wait".

By 1:10, we were fed up. My mother again approached the front desk, and the afformentioned hostess and another hostess, a rotund blond, told her that "we were next." This was then proceeded with the blond hostess calling three parties-of-five right after that statement. My mother asked the blond hostess "I thought we were next?" The blond hostess just walked by my mother, in front of myself and my Godmother, not acknowledging her prescence even though she was standing no less than 3 feet away from here.

My Godfather then confronted a brown haired male in a brown suit, and we were told by the front desk that, once again, "we were next". The blond hostess then called ANOTHER party of five. We then were fed up, my mother said the phrase "There are better places to eat than here", and we left.

Not only were your hostesses incredibly rude, they ruined what was supposed to be a celebration of my family not only of Christmas, but the reunion of myself and my Godparents, and my 21st birthday. We have dined at your restaurants on numerous holidays over the last four years, and we normally never get this treatment. Everytime in the past, your staff made us feel right at home, seated us promptly, and were constantly checking to ensure our satisfaction. I've recommended numerous friends to your business as well. I cannot believe we would be treated to such disrespect in such an established restaurant, especially since we had done nothing to warrant it.

I would also like to note that the last time we dined at the 94th Aero Squadron, a waitress mistakenly added a child to our bill, and it took another hour to clear the glich up.

Recapping everything, at least 7 parties-of-five were called during our wait. If you could seat a table of five, how can you not sit a table of four who had made reservations? Well, you will not be receiving this party's business ever again. I am also going to forward this e-mail to your other franchises, as well as your corporate office should you have one. My mother's employer, the San Diego School District, will become aware of this in the hopes that the thousands of teachers, faculty and students of our fine city will never do business with you again. My place of employment, the San Diego State University Annual Fund and Alumni Association, will also hear of this incident. Lastly, I am notifying every Delta Sigma Phi chapter that exists near a 94th Aero Squadron to not do business with your establishment. If neccessary, we will bring this to the Asian-American community of San Diego, for even though we cannot prove it, there was no possible reason to ignore us as such other than the fact that we were four Asian-Americans in an upscale restaurant.

I hope this finds someone who'll actually take notice, because you lost two very loyal customers, and possibly many more. Thank you for taking the time to read this.

[DeltaSigStan]

Update:

The ONE Delta Sig I talked to that goes to U of Maryland used to work at the 94th Squadron in College Park...heh

[Jadey28]

DSS,
I used to work at a restaurant, and I would have to handle complaints and the such that didn't get sent to our corporate office first. Your letter is very professionally written and the recipent of the letter should contact you immediately. Are you planning on leaving a contact number or email for them to reach you at? I know we would call the person who was "complaining," listen to them and send them complimentary gift certificates for their next meal. (I say "complaining" because some people had perfect dining experiences and just felt like sending in a complaint because they knew how we handled situations like that~free meal.) My manager would tell the customer to alert the server the next time they were in the restaurant so he could speak to them face to face and make sure their dining experience was just as they wished.

Anyway, I hope that didn't confuse you since it was so long. I definately hope you are contacted by someone at the restaurant. If not, I wouldn't ever do business there again. No business should ever treat customers that way (even if the customers are rude.)

[Tom Earp]

Stan, My Compliments to you!


A very nice and Professional Letter!

I for one congratulate you and think if I were you, I would put this out to as many people that you know!

One can forgive sometimes bad food, but not bad service, manners or stupidity! People like this understand only one thing! $$$$$, they lose enough, da, they go out of Biz!

If you get any satisfaction by way of coupons, I would donate them to a charity! Or maybe a Homeless Person!

I am being very evil over this!

Go Stan!

[Peaches-n-Cream]

I am sorry that you and your family and Godparents experienced this awful treatment on your birthday. I hope that writing and sending that letter will resolve the problem.

When I read about your experience, it reminded me of the Denny's discrimination lawsuit. Six African American Secret Service agents ordered food that took so long to arrive it resulted in them being denied service. There was a lawsuit which changed Denny's business practices and how they train their employees. If you feel up to it, you can send a copy of your letter to:

U.S. Department of Justice
Civil Rights Division
950 Pennsylvania Avenue, N.W.
Housing and Civil Enforcement Section, NWB
Washington, D.C. 20530

They handle discrimination cases at public accommodations like restaurants. If you are interested in filing a complaint, this website can help. Wishing you the best.