Funniest Family.........

exquizit · #1 03-19-2001, 10:28 PM

You guys, all this talk about family superstitions and home remedies got my friends and I started on a new topic....

Your family's funniest sayings......

My grandmother's favorite one to use is..."If ugliness was a sin..hellbound he would be"

or other silly ones like "I haven't seen you since you were knee high to a duck"

Do you or your family have any?

AKA2D '91 · #2 03-19-2001, 10:43 PM

I heard these from relatives of mine...

1. I haven't seen so and so since Hector was a pup...

(Don't ask, don't ask)

2. Sit in the "gap" and wait on a ni$$%, he/she will always have to come through...

TRANSLATION: when someone does something to hurt you or something ill-will towards you, that SAME person is going to have to come your way for some type of favor and/or assistance...so don't worry or fret, they will NEED you!

CrimsonTide4 · #3 03-19-2001, 11:17 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by exquizit:

My grandmother's favorite one to use is..."If ugliness was a sin..hellbound he would be"

Yo Granny is FUNNY

I'm going to have to use that. I have some students that think their sh** don't stink and LAWD it DOES!!

[This message has been edited by CrimsonTide4 (edited March 19, 2001).]

herutopia · #4 03-19-2001, 11:26 PM

exquizit ... how MANY TIMES have I heard the "knee high to a duck!"

AKA2D'91 ... I laughed at the fact that there's going to have to BE a TRANSLATION: for some of these!

My family has TOO many ...

The one I can remember off the top of my head is:

"Five'll get 'ya ten ..." meaning "I'll bet you that ..." etc., etc.

BRB with some more!

SweetestDiva · #5 03-19-2001, 11:41 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by herutopia:
exquizit ... how MANY TIMES have I heard the "knee high to a duck!"

Weird.. my family always says "knee high to a grasshopper." Maybe we're just weird like that.

My mama always compares things to Carter's Cod Liver Pills (i.e. - "Girl, she got more issues than Carter got liver pills!")

lilmama_26 · #6 03-20-2001, 12:52 AM

"tell the truth and shame the devil!"

#7 03-20-2001, 02:01 AM

He/She is about as crazy as a Betsy Bug.

If someone says this you are truly crazy but um....what is a Betsy Bug and how crazy does it get?

Don't give anyone a hammer to beat you over the head with.

TRANSLATION: Don't tell people all of your business. It gives others the upper hand to make you a part of gossip. One day it will come back on you and you might regret it thus beating you over the head.

Conskeeted19 · #8 03-20-2001, 02:22 AM

Granny would say things like...

Lawd dat gul done broke her leg

Don't let no car drive in yo garage. LOL

Don't you open yo pocket book up for no wallet

Don't turn dat stump over you might find snakes.

MaMaBuddha · #9 03-20-2001, 02:48 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Conskeeted19:
Granny would say things like...

Lawd dat gul done broke her leg

Don't let no car drive in yo garage. LOL

Don't you open yo pocket book up for no wallet

Don't turn dat stump over you might find snakes.

conskeeted....where your granny from??? my granny a bit country, from the back hills of tennessee.

funny little sayings..

i look exactly like my Big PoppaBuddha..so i get...

lawd...he look like he done spit you out.

here's another and i find myself saying it sometimes...

Conversation:

Me: MaMa..where juney gone?

MaMa: he fittin' tago roundback tada sto

that's my MaMa....

[This message has been edited by MaMaBuddha (edited March 20, 2001).]

Conskeeted19 · #10 03-20-2001, 03:05 AM

MaMaBuddah, you are sooooo crazy! Instead of saying whisper my granny would say swisper! Do you remember hearing this? Umph Umph Umph gul hush yo mouth - you don't say

tickledpink · #11 03-20-2001, 06:14 AM

Oooh, I like this topic!

Ok, here goes some of my mama's sayings:

"The more I tell you, the dumber I get!" (This was usually said when I was having a hard headed moment).

"A hard head makes a soft behind."

and my personal favorite:

Dumber than dirt/ a doorknob/ a shoelace (replace with any object)

[This message has been edited by tickledpink (edited March 20, 2001).]

exquizit · #12 03-20-2001, 08:49 AM

"Since Heck wuz a pup!!" LOL My family runs that one in the ground!

How about..."I wouldn't touch that with a 10ft pole"

"Find a fool, bump his head"
(If the persons dumb enough to let you do it, then do it)

"Don't nothin' stay open past 2am but 7'eleven and legs" LOL

buterscotch1 · #13 03-20-2001, 09:27 AM

My family uses: "That boy's/girl's so ugly, I've seen better faces on an Iodine bottle" or "Don't pee in my face, then tell me it's rain" and my favorite is fron my Great Aunt: "Gurl I's ain't seens you since Booth shot Lincoln!!!!!!"

[This message has been edited by buterscotch1 (edited March 20, 2001).]

Eclipse · #14 03-20-2001, 10:30 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Conskeeted19:
Granny would say things like...

Lawd dat gul done broke her leg

Don't let no car drive in yo garage. LOL

Don't you open yo pocket book up for no wallet

Girl, I need a translation on these! I understood the snake one, and I think I get the car/garage one, but help a sista out!

Eclipse · #15 03-20-2001, 10:51 AM

We used to say this as kids when someone was selling wolf tickets (hey! that's another one!) but did not really want to fight:
"Feeling froggy? Then jump!"

A friend from Macon, GA turned me on to
"A hit dog will holler."

One of my great-aunts likes to say "So and So is like a broke fridgedaire (yes, fridgedaire)...can't keep nothing!"