I Need A Ventful Ear....

#1 09-26-2003, 11:40 AM

Okay, I used to be engaged to this guy, right? Well, we broke it off for some personal reasons (okay, he was cheatin, but anyway...) Lately, he's been trying to get back with me and I love him and all, but I'm not trying to put my heart out there again. Here's the kicker, too. I believe God gives me dreams about what's going on in our relationship. He's been doing that for a long time, although I tried to ignore some of them. Just like He would show me dreams of my ex cheating on me, but I shrugged them off, thinking it was all in my mind. Well, as you know, that came out to be true. Well, I've actually been thinking about getting back with him. I know, you think I'm silly...sometimes I think that of myself

. Last night, though, I had this dream about him in the bed with three different girls at the same time. None of them were me. My ex and I used to listen to Sade all the time and whenever we heard one of her songs come on, we would say 'I love you' and kiss each other. In my dream, I caught him playing a Sade song for someone else. When I confronted him about it, all he did was cry. I've been having dreams like this for a little while now. I don't know what else to think or do. All my emotions for him have been exhausted, but I still feel for him. Is that crazy or what? Well, I just had to vent a little bit. Hope I didn't get on anyone's nerves. Pray my strength in the Lord, PLEASE!!

treblk · #2 09-26-2003, 11:48 AM

good luck to you..but if your dreams do come ture, then why are you trying to dought them?

CrimsonTide4 · #3 09-26-2003, 11:50 AM

God gives you these dreams for a reason.

Don't SETTLE for 1/2 a man or a man who is not WHOLLY committed to you.

#4 09-26-2003, 01:09 PM

Treblk,
I don't want those dreams to come true, although I feel that they already have. My whole query is that I don't really know what to feel about a man whom I know has cheated on me before, but is now promising not to do it again. I think the hardest part in letting him go is that we've been through so much together. We would have been together for 4 years on October 20. I just don't know.....

Crimsontide,
You're right. I actually had a cousin tell me those exact words. Funny that she's a delta, too, huh?

I just wish I could turn back the hands of time and change some things we both did in the relationship because I have cheated, too. (It's only fair that I express that.) But I refuse to blame myself for his cheating. I know I deserve a man who is going to be wholly committed to just me and I know that he's out there somewhere. I just pray that I find him before my biological clock stops tickin

CrimsonTide4 · #5 09-26-2003, 01:37 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ImaDiamond
Treblk,
I don't want those dreams to come true, although I feel that they already have. My whole query is that I don't really know what to feel about a man whom I know has cheated on me before, but is now promising not to do it again. I think the hardest part in letting him go is that we've been through so much together. We would have been together for 4 years on October 20. I just don't know.....

Crimsontide,
You're right. I actually had a cousin tell me those exact words. Funny that she's a delta, too, huh? I just wish I could turn back the hands of time and change some things we both did in the relationship because I have cheated, too. (It's only fair that I express that.) But I refuse to blame myself for his cheating. I know I deserve a man who is going to be wholly committed to just me and I know that he's out there somewhere. I just pray that I find him before my biological clock stops tickin

Sounds like you have some things that you need to work on yourself. You admitted that you cheated. Why? (You don't have to answer here but think about it.) God has revealed things to you about your ex, but what has He revealed to you about yourself?

treblk · #6 09-26-2003, 01:57 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ImaDiamond
Treblk,
I don't want those dreams to come true, although I feel that they already have. My whole query is that I don't really know what to feel about a man whom I know has cheated on me before, but is now promising not to do it again. I think the hardest part in letting him go is that we've been through so much together. We would have been together for 4 years on October 20. I just don't know.....

Crimsontide,
You're right. I actually had a cousin tell me those exact words. Funny that she's a delta, too, huh? I just wish I could turn back the hands of time and change some things we both did in the relationship because I have cheated, too. (It's only fair that I express that.) But I refuse to blame myself for his cheating. I know I deserve a man who is going to be wholly committed to just me and I know that he's out there somewhere. I just pray that I find him before my biological clock stops tickin

4 years of him cheating doesn't mean you need more years of him cheating
There is no need for you to turn back the hands of time, take these past 4 years as a learning experience and actually learn from them.
As my Soror CT4 stated..it sounds like YOU may need some time to your self instead of trying to give you self to some one else. What is so wrong with your clock ticking. If it's meant for you to have a child, then it will happen. Don't fool yourself into thinking he is the be all end all (however that goes).

all I'm saying is if you love yourself more, then let time heal your pain and move on. You deserve more then him.

CrimsonTide4 · #7 09-26-2003, 02:05 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by treblk
4 years of him cheating doesn't mean you need more years of him cheating
There is no need for you to turn back the hands of time, take these past 4 years as a learning experience and actually learn from them.
As my Soror CT4 stated..it sounds like YOU may need some time to your self instead of trying to give you self to some one else. What is so wrong with your clock ticking. If it's meant for you to have a child, then it will happen. Don't fool yourself into thinking he is the be all end all (however that goes).

all I'm saying is if you love yourself more, then let time heal your pain and move on. You deserve more then him.

You ain't never lied SOROR. Why folks always settling? Raise the bar. HE CHEATED!!! more than once!!! F HIM!!!! God has someone better in store.

You loved him and now it is time for you to let him go. Stop holding on to smelly CHIT!!! If it was meant to be, you would not have to fight to hold on to him.

EnVogue said it best, "Give HIM up, turn HIM loose."

#8 09-26-2003, 05:59 PM

Thank you, girls!! You're both right...I know what I got to do. I've always heard the saying, if it's meant to be, it will be, but God didn't intend for us to be with anyone that will give us mess!! He is not the author of mess or confusion. Thanks again and God bless!

kiml122 · #9 09-30-2003, 08:17 AM

If I can be blunt...which is one of my faults...but drop that fool like it's hot. Don't go down that road yet again for more heart ache and pain.