Do you....

Buttonz · #1 07-16-2003, 12:47 AM

If a PNM admits and is openly gay, do you look at her diffrently? I know your not supposed to, but whats supposed to be done and what is done is sometimes two diffrent things. (And, before anyone asks, no we don't look at them diffrently at all (at least the SDT chapter at my school dosent! Edited to add: We do have openly gay/bi sisters and we are all find with it...thats why I have been wondering how everyone out there looks at it))

bgsarah · #2 07-16-2003, 12:53 AM

I was wondering about that the other day as well. It seems like with ALLLLLL those girls going through recruitment, at least one would be openly gay.

pinkyphimu · #3 07-16-2003, 01:18 AM

it was never a problem in my chapter.

The_Nash · #4 07-16-2003, 01:24 AM

Last semester we gave a bid to a guy that was openly gay. It didn't change our opinions of him, he was a great guy no matter his sexuality

Lunarwolf · #5 07-16-2003, 01:27 AM

I don't know...If a PNM was gay, then she might not feel comfortable revealing it for fear of being cut. Likewise, even if a PNM is openly gay, sororities may cut her just so other PNMs won't get weirded out. Also, what gay girl in her right mind would willfully surround herself with attractive, intelligent, driven women she can't even hit on because of potential rifts in the sisterhood? It would be sheer torture!

Finally, gay people have great, tight knit clubs and support groups. They don't really need to join a sorority.

Gay men, on the other hand, have gay fraternities where they're forbidden to date a fellow brother.

GeekyPenguin · #6 07-16-2003, 01:34 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lunarwolf
I don't know...If a PNM was gay, then she might not feel comfortable revealing it for fear of being cut. Likewise, even if a PNM is openly gay, sororities may cut her just so other PNMs won't get weirded out. Also, what gay girl in her right mind would willfully surround herself with attractive, intelligent, driven women she can't even hit on because of potential rifts in the sisterhood? It would be sheer torture!

Finally, gay people have great, tight knit clubs and support groups. They don't really need to join a sorority.

Gay men, on the other hand, have gay fraternities where they're forbidden to date a fellow brother.

I think there are plenty of gay women in sororities who don't hit on their sister. I'm a member of AITP, which in my opinion has tons of attractive, intelligent, driven men and I manage to do just fine without hitting on them - same with College Democrats. I know a lot of gay men in fraternities and they don't hit on their brothers unless the brother is also openly gay. I would welcome a gay sister with open arms - she is my sister, and that is all that matters to me.

That being said, I can see where it would sadly hurt people in some recruitments - you can have all the non-discrimanation clauses you want, but I bet every org has a chapter that has rejected somebody for one of those reasons anyway. Is it sad? Yes, but it still happens.

Sistermadly · #7 07-16-2003, 01:41 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lunarwolf

Finally, gay people have great, tight knit clubs and support groups. They don't really need to join a sorority.

Is it written somewhere that gay people should only hang out with other gay people? And as for the attractiveness thing: are you attracted to every man you see? Just because a woman is a lesbian, it doesn't mean she wants to hump your leg just 'cause you have two X chromosomes.

AOcutiePi4ever · #8 07-16-2003, 01:49 AM

"Also, what gay girl in her right mind would willfully surround herself with attractive, intelligent, driven women she can't even hit on because of potential rifts in the sisterhood? It would be sheer torture!

Finally, gay people have great, tight knit clubs and support groups. They don't really need to join a sorority."

...I can't believe that is actually written...

Buttonz · #9 07-16-2003, 02:01 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by AOcutiePi4ever
"Also, what gay girl in her right mind would willfully surround herself with attractive, intelligent, driven women she can't even hit on because of potential rifts in the sisterhood? It would be sheer torture!

Finally, gay people have great, tight knit clubs and support groups. They don't really need to join a sorority."

...I can't believe that is actually written...

You and me alike! Yes I started this thread just to see the opinions out there...being as I am close with one of my openly bi sisters this is how I am going to choose to respond....Just like you dont go after EVERY guy you see, they don't go after EVERY girl tehy see...it works the same way! And they don' t need to join a sorority? If you think about it, how many of us really 'needed' to join one? But we did, right? And why? Because we wanted to! The same with them

...sorry for getting so owrked up I just didnt expect such a response

Lunarwolf · #10 07-16-2003, 04:22 AM

My apologies if I offended anyone, but from what I've seen, gay people do tend to clump together. That, and most of them would never bother with a sorority.

And that bit about the self-torture was meant lightly. God, people, chill out. I just meant that why would someone join a group where the members are all going to be pretty much attractive not necessarily in the physical sense, but in personality and drive. It was a JOKE, albeit a poorly worded one. No, I don't hump every guy I see -mostly because they're all either homosexual or taken or both. *sigh*

Again, my apologies for offending y'all.

WhirlwindTNX · #11 07-16-2003, 08:45 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lunarwolf
I don't know...If a PNM was gay, then she might not feel comfortable revealing it for fear of being cut. Likewise, even if a PNM is openly gay, sororities may cut her just so other PNMs won't get weirded out. Also, what gay girl in her right mind would willfully surround herself with attractive, intelligent, driven women she can't even hit on because of potential rifts in the sisterhood? It would be sheer torture!

Finally, gay people have great, tight knit clubs and support groups. They don't really need to join a sorority.

Gay men, on the other hand, have gay fraternities where they're forbidden to date a fellow brother.

WhirlwindTNX · #12 07-16-2003, 08:46 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lunarwolf
My apologies if I offended anyone, but from what I've seen, gay people do tend to clump together. That, and most of them would never bother with a sorority.

And that bit about the self-torture was meant lightly. God, people, chill out. I just meant that why would someone join a group where the members are all going to be pretty much attractive not necessarily in the physical sense, but in personality and drive. It was a JOKE, albeit a poorly worded one. No, I don't hump every guy I see -mostly because they're all either homosexual or taken or both. *sigh*

Again, my apologies for offending y'all.

Oh okay. Apology accepted.

Much GC love to yah!!

aephi alum · #13 07-16-2003, 08:49 AM

No problem here.

However - in another sorority at my school (which shall remain nameless) there was a young woman who was very well liked in her sorority, she was an officer, very involved, etc. She felt she could share anything with her sisters - so one day, at a fireside, she came out to them. BAM - after that, none of her sisters would hang out with her any more, she was never again elected to office, and she was generally made to feel unwelcome.

MoxieGrrl · #14 07-16-2003, 09:17 AM

I would not see a problem with a lesbian/bisexual joining my chapter. It takes all kinds to make the world go 'round!

There have been problems in the past with lesbian/bi sorority members on my campus.

A national officer of ABC told a girl, "I'm sorry to say, but nothing ruins your reputation and your numbers like pledging a lesbian!"

Another house did the same thing that aephi alum described...basically just turned their back on their sister after she came out to them. The girl ended up spended all of her time at my house, as her gf was a sister.

astroAPhi · #15 07-16-2003, 09:38 AM

We have an alum who openly a lesbian, but as of right now, we don't have any girls who are openly gay. I don't know if any of them are...

I dunno, I'm just kind of the mentality where if they are, and are out, great. If they are, and aren't out, I'm not really going to speculate on it. It's not really my business, and I'd rather concentrate on other aspects of my relationship with my sisters.

I'm just kind of laid back about the whole thing. And after all, a lesbian sister definitely isn't going to check out my boyfriend!