Sensitive issue-Special Needs

[kappa2]

I was wondering how you all felt about individuals with special needs going through rush. I come from a very greek family and this topic recently came up in regards to two now young members of the family with special needs. One has cerebral palsy and is in a wheelchair, the other has autism with some social development delays.

My husband had a brother in his fraternity who was deaf. He was absolutely hillarious & just the nicest guy around. The guys loved him, but I always wondered what the rush experience was like for him with the rest of the houses and how he was treated before people really got to know him.

Thoughts??

[ilovemyglo]

I don't see any problems having a sorority sister in a wheelchair (our house was handicap accessible) or with some sort of physical special need, however someone with Autism may be different depending on the level that their autism is. My sister in law's brother is autistic and I seriously doubt he will be able to go to college- or even get a diploma from a "regular" school.

But there is no reason why someone that is deaf, blind or physically handicapped shouldn't be able to go through rush!

[PhoenixAzul]

I would hope that anyone considered "Special needs" would be able to find a home at Otterbein just like anyone else. Friendship is essential to all.

[Kasis-anon]

I've thought of this question fairly often, although I do not have any direct experience recruiting women with special needs.
At one point when I was advising in this areas my fondest wish was to provide a American Sign Language translator for any woman attending recruitment that needed one.
I still think that would be a good idea during Recruitment. If something like that were provided it would be useful to highlight that information in a pre-rush packet or any advertisements. The other part is making sure all events are wheel-chair accessible. I know that past a certain year all buildings have had to adhere to a certain standard with regards to wheelchair accessibility but I wonder if all houses are able to accomodate wheelchairs with ease?
Those are two areas that I think as responsible Fraternity women we can ensure that we are casting the widest net possible during recruitment and hopefully recruiting women with various backgrounds and experiences.
Personally I can't wait to read other experiences and thoughts on this fabulous topic!
Thanks for posting this kappa2!!!

[alphaxikt]

This is a really interesting topic. I just finished a course in "Exceptional Students" as a part of my Masters-in-Teaching program.

I know that my sorority's house was not wheelchair friendly, and I am pretty sure that this is the case for a lot of older houses. However, a lot of chapters with older houses are starting to remodel now, so wheelchair accessability could become more common. Two houses at my school (ZTA and XO) had remodeled and therefore became wheelchair-friendly; I believe that XO had a member in a wheelchair at some point while I was an undergrad. I definitely think a member in a wheelchair would bring a new perspective to a chapter, and maybe help members of the Greek community as a whole develop a sense of empathy (note: empathy, NOT sympathy).

As for autism, it's known as a "spectrum" disease, meaning that individuals who have autism may fall anywhere within a range of symptoms. Severely autistic children may have the really obvious delays (non-verbal, non-reactive, etc..) and behaviors (such as hitting or pinching or otherwise harming themselves). Then there is "high functioning" autism which means that the individual has a better-than-grade level vocabulary, tends to get really into a specific subject of interest, and usually does pretty well in school. However, the biggest problem for individuals with high functioning autism is social interaction. That doesn't mean that sorority/fraternity life would be impossible, but it might present some challenges given the social nature of traditional GLOs. However, in the right chapter, Greek life might really help an individual with high functioning autism learn to better deal with new situations and make lifelong friends.

Gee, apparently I really am into this topic. Sorry for the long post.

[AGDLynn]

I think that each campus would be different depending on when and where recruitment functions are held. Unfortunately, many times functions are held in older buildings which may not be wheelchair friendly but that doesn't mean that there can't be acceptions to some of the rules.

At my school, all the formal rec. parties (except pref) are held in the 3 story sorority dorm. To my knowledge, there has only been one wheel-chair pnm..more on that later. The school is considering new Greek housing which may have elevators or the functions could be moved to the new Student Services building.

As for autism and other related disorders, it definitely depends on the individual and the chapter members themselves. The school would have, hopefully, a pretty good idea of the student's potential limitations before accepting him/her but also the positives.

Decades ago, my chapter pledged a wonderful young woman who was handicapped. She didn't use a wheelchair but we made sure she was always included in our functions.

On the other hand, I know of a past situation where a handicapped pnm went through recruitment.

The problem wasn't the disability, it was the pnm's negative attitude towards people...which was not acceptable under any circumstances. I think she would have been released even if she had invented a cure of AIDS, poverty and cancer plus walked on all planets. The pnm was very aware of what she was saying .

[JenMarie]

I worked with a non-profit whose mission focused on inclusion programs. I think it would be wonderful for students with special needs to go through recruitment and find a home if they so chose.

One thing I did learn while working with this non-profit is that there is a whole set of vocabulary that is more "PC." For example, saying a child "has autism" as apposed to "the child is autistic" or referring to myself as someone without a disability as apposed to "I am normal." (Believe me, lots of people use the normal thing... it's crazy.) If anything it opened my eyes to these disabilities and how including children and adults in activities, like recruitment, can be very beneficial to their development.

So maybe slipping a small sheet of paper in a recruitment workshop packet regarding proper terminology could be helpful. If no one comes through recruitment with a disability, I suppose it would just be good to know anyway.

[FSUZeta]

we had a sister who was deaf-she read lips- and we made adaptations for her. she was a wonderful member and a terrific rusher.

i agree-autism is a whole different thing. with the varying degrees of autism and the traits that someone with autism can have, i think that it would be difficult for the chapter and the individual to cope with.

[DGMarie]

Considering that questions about mental impairments don't show up on many rush applications, most people are taken on face value. If your relative with autism is not able to hold conversations, is extraordinarily shy or anti-social, it may not be a good fit to join a greek organization. Family pressure should be left out of it.

[aephi alum]

If someone with special needs wants to rush, more power to them!

In certain situations, such as severe autism, a social GLO may not be a good fit. That doesn't mean the individual shouldn't try, just that things may not work out.

In many cases, it's not so much a question of having a disability, but rather a question of what your attitude is towards your disability. Say you're blind, for example. Do you let that hold you back, or do you grab your seeing-eye dog and go and do? Your blindness may mean you can't drive a car, but it doesn't mean you can't join a GLO or go to college or hold a job or raise a family.

We had a PNM come through one year who was temporarily confined to a wheelchair. She wasn't about to let that hold her back, though. Panhel made arrangements for her mother to accompany her, so that she didn't have to worry about steering a wheelchair herself, and rush is held in the student center, which is wheelchair-friendly. All went well, and she ended up going AEPhi.

(edited because I can't spell )

[KSUViolet06]

A good friend and Kappa Phi sister of mine is in an electric wheelchair and did formal rush back in 2002. It was a good experience for her. Her Sigma Rho Chi made sure all the houses knew about her and any extra help/adaptations she would need in attending the parties. It went pretty well and she's now going into her fourth year in Chi Omega.

[LightBulb]

Last year, a guy with cerebal palsy rushed at my school. He's a great guy, and he became a TKE and is one of the most popular in his (large) pledge class. This should not be an issue.

[RedRoseSAI]

Originally posted by aephi alum
Say you're blind, for example. Do you let that hold you back, or do you grab your seeing-eye dog and go and do? Your blindness may mean you can't drive a car, but it doesn't mean you can't join a GLO or go to college or hold a job or raise a family.

Agreed. We had a sister in my college chapter who has been blind from birth. She was an active, loving member of our chapter who participated in everything we did.

[nauadpi]

This topic makes me think of someone who I had known since kindergarden... She was one of the most outgoing women I have ever known, but she was born with cystic fibrosis. She spent elementary school in and out of the hospital. I remember going and visiting her there all the time. Finally in 8th grade she missed all of the school year. But during that time she was able to have lung transplanet surgery. She returned with us to start high school. She came back like her old self... A great story comes from one of the english teachers at our high school... He had given the assignment to write about overcoming an obstical. She walked up to him to tell him she had nothing to write about. That was the way her mindset always was. Except for her stuned growth if you met her for the first time you would never know she was sick. After high school she went on to Stanford University where she went through recruitment and joined a sorority. She was an extremely active sister in her sorority and during her sophmore year she moved into the house. But by her junior year she could not return. Her health had deteriorated too far. From stories people who saw her at this time would tell, she was her same self during this time. You could talk to her and you would forget she was sick until she started coughing and needed her oxygen tank. She would talk about her adventures with her sisters. Even in her last weeks she talked about being afraid she was out of school too long and would have to reaply if she missed much more school. She did not want to be considered as sick, and she lived her life that way.

I don't think it is up to us to decide if someone should go through recruitment, but just give them the oportunity.

[33girl]

Originally posted by nauadpi
From stories people who saw her at this time would tell, she was her same self during this time. You could talk to her and you would forget she was sick until she started coughing and needed her oxygen tank. She would talk about her adventures with her sisters. Even in her last weeks she talked about being afraid she was out of school too long and would have to reaply if she missed much more school. She did not want to be considered as sick, and she lived her life that way.

I don't think it is up to us to decide if someone should go through recruitment, but just give them the oportunity.

I think this is one of the most important things to remember when dealing with anybody ANYTIME (not just rush) that has any sort of disability. Take your cue from that person. Don't try to do too much for them - that can be just as bad as not doing enough. If they say they're fine and they don't need your help - BELIEVE THEM. They know their own limitations far better than you do.